"Dear Advice Columnist: I'm divorcing my porn-loving husband."

[Inigo_Montoya]

@Der Trihs

@The Flying Dutchman

Count me as one who can’t understand why a married man who has a healthy married life feels the need to masturbate.

Because being married doesn’t mean you have a synchronized sex drive. It doesn’t mean you’ll both want sex just as much, at the same times. Should a man divorce his wife just because he’d like to have sex more often than she does ?

I don’t mean to be a One Trick (heh) Pony here, but I have an interesting perspective on this. My estranged and I have known a rather spartain sex life for many years. I figured it was because her drive had just naturaly dropped off-neither of us is particularly unattractive. Certainly not “bucke of cold water on the 'nads” unattractive. So I just kinda did without and had some reliable websites memorized to kind of cool the engines from time to time. Never turned her down on the rare occasion she wanted the best of me, and never turned to another person. When she took her lover…like rabbits, the two of them. So aparently there was an underlying communication problem (we didn’t/couldn’t) that had really cooled things off. The marriage was, in most other respects, a healthy one.

As for the OP? Yeah, it’s a case of the ignorant leading the stupid, but what can you do?

[Aeschines]

@Ensign Edison

You’re a grown man who calls other adults “dear child” in the middle of arguments and I’m a tool?

You’re a tool because of your overall cluessness combined with an outlandish and swaggering confidence–not because you used one phrase I didn’t like.

[Miller]

@Aeschines

You’re a tool because of your overall cluessness combined with an outlandish and swaggering confidence…

Now that’s what I call ironic.

[HMS_Irruncible]

@Inigo Montoya

When she took her lover…like rabbits, the two of them. So aparently there was an underlying communication problem (we didn’t/couldn’t) that had really cooled things off. The marriage was, in most other respects, a healthy one.

But it should be obvious that in the chemistry department, the non-spouse by definition is favored by the novelty factor and a complete absence of domestic baggage. Not wishing ill on anyone but check back in on the fortunate couple in 5 years or so; if they are still together, chances are it won’t be “like rabbits” anymore.

[Aeschines]

@Miller

Now that’s what I call ironic.

You just doubled the irony.

[HMS_Irruncible]

@Aeschines

You just doubled the irony.

OK… so does that make him rubber, or glue? Just trying to keep it straight.

[Aeschines]

@Brain Wreck

OK… so does that make him rubber, or glue? Just trying to keep it straight.

He’s a double rubber, double glue sandwich. Suitable for pr0n.

[Malacandra]

@Miller

You know, “Lukewarm Buttcheek” would make for a spectacularly bad band name.

Or a dysfunctional one-book character in a Pratchett novel.

[betenoir]

Ok, have to admit I haven’t read most of the thread…mostly because my connectioning screwed and I think I’m going to get thrown off again (meaning no more porn tonight).

But I wanted to respond.

I wanted SO much to agree with you.

I’ve seen similar letters…mostly because I read Christian web sites. Porn is a serious plaugue on the land and a major problem in marriage. I can’t say how many “my husband is addicted to porn!!!” articles I’ve seen.

But honestly.

Your husband is not looking at porn because you are overweight, or because there is ANYTHING wrong with you. he is looking at porn because you note, men look at porn. Men like to look at (various) naked women. They also like to see people fucking (come to think of itsoi do I).

I’'d also like to mention that my SO looks at porn (often with me…remind me I was going to send him some i particularly liked…but his main complaint it the girls are to skinny…not like me. I believe comment at one point was “there’s an ass not even worth spanking”.

What else? ok, MOST men look at porn. Some (no doubt more than .1%) don’t…that doesn’t make them weirdos. Sexuality takes many forms.

Conseling CAN help. Assuming the conselour doesn’t think like the advice colmnist. But it can help people understand each other.

Monogomy is not natural. It IS however a choice. And cheating on your spouse when yuo’ve agreed not is a nasty thing to do. On the other hand it has nothing to do with porn.

Anyway…I expect this has all been covered in the last 5 pages :o but I had to say it.

Before my connection disappears.
I REALLY wanted to agree with you. Oh well.