I give up.
Discuss letter 1. No one listens to me anyway. :smack:
Nah, it’s just pretty clear that Annie is wrong and you’re right. That sort of behavior doesn’t happen in a healthy relationship. Counseling or something could be more in order.
Well, I still think the letter write in #1 was petty and going out of her way to needle her SIL. Just because someone doesn’t celebrate Christmas doesn’t mean you still can’t buy her a gift. Just don’t expect one in return.
I do think, however, that the SIL is a bit silly in not going to the baptism but showing up for the food. I’m not particularly religious, but I have attended christenings and church services where my nieces and nephews were singing. Didn’t harm me none.
Not as far as I know. It just did not seem a big deal to me. Similarly I would see nothing wrong with a Free Presbyterian not attending my first ceremony (in a Catholic Church), but coming to the reception to celebrate my wedding with me.
As for letter two, I think obviously the wife is wacko, but I wonder what had gone on between them regarding this issue in the preceding years.
By his description, it is appalling.
But one thing I’ve learned in dealing with people: There’s always two sides to the story. I’ve often gotten steamed up with righteous indignation after hearing one side, and go in to confront the other person, loaded for bear. Only to discover that lots of times, things weren’t the way they were initially presented.
What do we know about the situation? Their relationship has problems. If hubby was my patient, and his story was condensible to Abby’s letter, I’d suggest counselling for both. I’d be willing to meet with them both, and see which way was best to steer them. If wifey refused, I’d encourage counselling for hubby so he could learn how to deal with things.
True, the Christmas gift exchange was pretty petty, I agree.
Yeah, I mean, she just up out of the blue tore it up and screamed at him-he’s her HUSBAND? I wonder if he’s cheated in the past, or something like that. At any rate, there has to be something more to the story, and I think the answer was definitely lacking. At LEAST a suggestion for counseling.
The first letter-definitely rude to insist on getting all the gifts and food, but not be willing to come to the christening, or whatever. If there’s a reason you can’t make it until later, that’s one thing. But saying, “Well, I just REFUSE to set foot in a church, blah blah blah…but hey, I’ll show up for the food!”
How about “letter” #3 where Annie gleefully passes along some glurge that was sent to her “anonymously via the internet”? How cute! :rolleyes:
I agree with the OP–Annie sucks!!
Sorry to get back to the first letter again, but…
6.5 years ago my hubby and I were married in a hotel by a female justice of the peace. My father’s born-again Christian mother RSVPed. She conveniently arrived just after the ceremony had ended. Passive aggressive cow.
Someone else’s marriage or baptism isn’t about you. If you can’t attend for love of family or friends, don’t attend at all and certainly don’t bitch about it.
/Ms. Cyros
Just showing up for the free food if that’s your intent will not gain you any points with me.
Okay, I’ll say something about letter #2. The writer says, in plain text, that he has not been back to the doctor since the script was written. The columnist(s) were voicing concern that he was neglecting his health, and possibly jeopardizing his physical well-being.
A conservative assumption that the man was at least 15 years old when he married would make him at least 60 years old after 45 years of marriage. Perhaps Dr. Qadgop could give us the benefit of his experience and training in the question of whether it is generally a good idea for a man in his sixties to skip contact with the health-care profession for two years (and counting).l
Geez, what are you guys serving for food? Stuffed peacocks, twenty year old scotch, bonbons dipped in real gold?
Because, at least among my family and friends, our time is a great deal rarer and more precious than a plateful of cake or catered chicken or whatever. By the time you’ve gotten dressed, driven to a reception, made nice with the happy couple, eaten a piece of cake maybe, driven home…you’ve basically killed an entire afternoon.
No way would I or anyone else I know be bothered to do that for the food.
And if any of my friends had some hangup that kept them from attending my wedding, I would have been delighted to have them come only to the reception. The point is to have your friends join you in celebrating, not to get them to polish the pews for an hour.
Re: the second letter. I personally don’t think impotence is a legitimate “medical condition.” That’s just the way it goes. I also think it’s creepy for these old goats to want to go out and buy boner pills so they can harrass their poor old wives who don’t want to do that anymore and should be allowed to retire from it. If that woman threw the prescription away it’s because she didn’t want this randy old fart chasing her around with a 10-hour hard on. If she doesn’t want to have sex then what does he need the boner pills for?
The fact that we treat male impotence like it’s actually important is disgusting to me. So you can’t get it up. Too bad. Some people don’t have anything to eat. Some people have cancer. Some people have untreatable pain. Don’t cry to me about your flaccid putz. I could give less of a shit. And leave your poor wife alone.
As to the second letter, what kind of A hole would make make a social invite to a friend contingent on whether that friend is willing to suffer through your personal religious ritual?
I hate weddings, funerals, baptisms, etc. not because they’re religious but because they bore the shit out of me…well also because I hate it when I find myself in a situation where I’m forced to either participate hypocritically and insincerely in a prayer or look like a jerk by demurring to join in.
If someone wants to invite me to a party, I’m there, but if they want to invite me to church I’m out like Seacrest. I see them as two separate invitations to two separate activities and I don’t think it’s fair to demand that somebody go to Sunday mass with you or they can’t attend your Superbowl party.
I am not commenting on #1 because I do not want to think about a 60 year old guy with Viagra. The Bob Dole ads were enough, thankyewverramuch. I’m sure it’s just lovely wanting to still get it on in your golden years, but that’s something I’d rather not think about till I get there myself. 
As for #2, count me as an atheist with no problems going to churches. I do get REALLY bored of weddings though. Boyfriend and I have argued quite a bit over this point, because I don’t want one at all, but will probably end up with a totally non-religious ceremony as some sort of compromise if we ever marry. Part of the reason I don’t want a wedding is that I don’t want to inflict that loathesome boringness on my friends and family. I may put a 15-minute limit on it or something. Refusing to go to the ceremony just because it’s at a church or they’re praying is pretty silly though. It’s not like you believe in it, so why does it matter where you are? If you just absolutely can’t sit still for that long even for your friends, that’s one thing, but just because it’s a church…meh.
I used to go to Catholic Mass just because I liked the music. I never quite got up the nerve to take the Jesus wafers and the wine though. I probably would now; I was more timid back then. The last time I went was an Easter, and the priest got me in the eye with some Holy water and said “gotcha!” in a whisper as he passed me… and it burned. So I didn’t go again.
There’s a synagogue (sp?) not too far from me. I really want to go to one of the services or what-have-you to check it out, out of curiosity, but I haven’t met anyone that goes there and I’m not going by myself! 
I’m so sorry you’re having such a savagely ageist day. You must be in great pain.
I’m sure you have the interpretation of the wife’s reasons correctly deciphered, because you’re so certain. I admire certainty in those who are young. So you must be right about those “old goats” who mistakenly believe they still want sex after the god-awful obscene age of…well, I better ask the expert where the cut-off age is; would you say it should be 40, 50, 60, or what exactly?
Gosh, I sure hope you’re better soon.
Women are allowed to retire from sex? What does that take, 30 years? More or less? Do we get a watch at least?
If we don’t want to retire, are we forced to?
I’m kidding… don’t retire me.
Me too.
I wonder what racing horses do. I know they retire once and go out to stud. Do they retire a second time from that?
Is that 30 years of having sex? Because, if so, my retirement is fast approaching! :eek: Or is it 30 years of sex with the same person? If so, we have a good 19 years to go.
If that includes masturbation, I’m working past retirement.