Dec the Halls with Rants and Howling

It isn’t DEC anymore, it’s Digital.

It isn’t Digital anymore, it’s Compaq.

It isn’t Compaq anymore, it’s Hewlett-Packard.

It isn’t Hewlett-Packard anymore, it’s HP.

I prefer to INC the halls anyway.

Not really a rant, but a vent I guess? The building that my boyfriend’s business is in caught fire due to apparent negligence by a roofing crew laying tar. His and the other retail businesses in the same building are now closed for the time being and the second floor meeting/storage space is a loss (along with it’s revenue). Right at the beginning of the part of the year when they make their biggest sales. Feeling sad/angry/useless about this.
Last week a coworker lost his son to a traffic accident.
Two months before that my supervisor broke his hip and hasn’t been back yet.
Two weeks before that I broke my leg and I’m still not healed completely.
I’m already ready for this year to be done.

My wife paid for street parking in DC, but didn’t realize that you have to change the default vehicle in the ParkMobile app. She got a ticket, I contested it on the grounds that we paid $8 to park a car that was 400 miles away. I hoped someone reasonable would respond.

Just got rejection letter today. This is why people hate the government.

Heifergaria. Everyone remembers Bulgaria, no one remembers Heifergaria. It’s myscowgeny at its purest.

The one in Indiana?

No, Hungaria.

Ah. And not Lithugaria.

Goddammit! Its gonna cost at least $700 bucks to rebuild a Turbo HydraMatic 400 to make my piece of shit Jeep semi-reliable just so I can take a butt-load of fucking entitled Weiner-Dogs running every day.

Maybe I’ll get lucky and find one in a junkyard for a hundy.

Of course, some asshole is tempting me to buy his equally piece of shit Grand Cherokee for $500 since he ran into a parked car and wrecked the front end. I don’t care. Neither do the dogs. I just don’t want another fucking Jeep!

I need to reevaluate my priorities and how I live my life. I’m failing.

Well, at least you’re entitled to butt-fuck wiener dogs.

nm - tags got screwed up it’ll take more than 5 minutes to fix. I’ll fix and repost later

Y’know, some of us make mental images when we read…

And you’re the ones who make it all worthwhile.

Words mean things, damn it.

I am in a meeting on a construction site today. The subject in question was a large sliding door used to separate an indoor living area from an outdoor living area.

All morning I was listening to guys talk about “the door moving east” and “the door moving west”

So I say “when the door is closed how will they get to the switch?” and immediately get corrected.

You mean “when the door is in the west position”. If you say " when the door is closed no one will know what you mean"

Actually, if they speak English and aren’t really stupid they will.

“It’s all a matter of perception.”

No, it really isn’t. I’ve stayed in dozens of hotels and many of them have signs asking you to close the sliding glass doors when you are not in the room. This has never confused me and I have never had to call the front desk to ask whether they mean for me to push them to the east or to the west. And I bet no one else ever has, either.

"Some people might say the door was open when it is in the retracted position

(YES! Those people would be, you know, correct )

While other people might call that the closed position.

Other people might say the light is OFF when the bulb is shining bright and emitting light and heat but they would be wrong because words mean things. For that matter, other people might say the door is festive spaghetti puppies but we would roll our eyes at that because words are supposed to mean things, and they do.

That’s a good one, Ann Hedonia. I get corrected on crap like that all the time in the corporate world. Just recently when I was complaining that my team (which is assigned to the “data out” portion* of our services) was expected to drive the software design and I was corrected. I was told we’re not driving the design. (* Data entered in our systems are distributed in subscription file formats to customers and we publish documentation explaining what that data is and how to use it. It’s a dumb way to divide the organization: input team and output team. Sounds nice, but has major problems.)

Okay, so we the “data out” team is expected to analyze the problem, propose a solution which usually includes deciding which data elements to add to the database (and thus the UI) so that we can then write up our “data out” documentation.

Correct.

But that’s not driving the design?

Nope.

Well, fuck me, then.

You a wiener dog? Instructions unclear…

YOU people. You know who you are. The ones who walk around, particularly around and on public transportation, with your long umbrellas in your hand pointed backward. The ones who apparently don’t give a shit that you are threatening and occasionally stabbing people who are observing normal personal-space boundaries in these circumstances.

Yes, you. Fuck you. And learn to carry your umbrella like a decent human being.

Dear people who stop two car lengths behind the car in front of you at a stoplight and then slowly creep up, inch by inch, until the light changes:

Please shove a rabid opossum up your nether orifice.

Hate,
The person stuck behind you at the light.

That so very, very much explains the Australian ecosystem.

One of my dogs lost her harness yesterday and I can’t find it. I have looked all over the house and back yard. Twice. The damn thing is red and should stick out like a sore thumb. I think I kept one of the old ones. Hopefully I can find that.

Twice I have grabbed an umbrella, from behind the person, and pulled on it. I growled at them to hold it upright and stop stabbing people with it. Both times men. Really just clueless and apologetic.