Just curious how you folks handle the mail you get from financial institutions, credit card companies, and etc. You know, the ones that have the words “IMPORTANT INFORMATION ABOUT YOUR ACCOUNT” emblazoned on the envelope in big letters.
Then when you open them you find six or seven dense pages, printed on both sides, with single spaced lines, all written in lawyer-speak.
Do you guys chug your way thru all that verbiage? I must confess I don’t usually get beyond the first paragraph, and decide that probably none of this BS will affect me in any way.
Sometimes if it’s from my brokerage, I’ll call up the broker and ask “Say, Mike, does this have ANYTHING to do with me?” Always the answer is “No, none of it.”
Several months ago at work we got a real ball-buster of a letter (at least a dozen closely typed pages) from our bank credit card servicer. I didn’t even read the first paragraph, but immediately sent a copy of this to our banker requesting a translation into English. About a week later I got an email from him saying “Don’t worry about it - this has no effect on your account”.
Anyway, I just wondered how you Dopers approach this BS. It seems a monumental waste of time for both the companies sending the stuff out and the recipients.
I applied to rent an apartment once. The landlord called me on the phone to “interview” me. He said he just wanted to get a sense of who his applicants are. Sounds like a reasonable plan, no?
So we chatted a while. Of course, while he was getting a sense of who I was, I was getting a sense of who he was. If it had ever occurred to him that it might work both ways, maybe he wouldn’t call his applicants like that.
The guy spoke in turgid legalese. Like he couldn’t help himself or something. I assume he was a lawyer as well as a landlord, but I didn’t ask that. I shuddered to think of renting from a landlord who was not only (apparently) a lawyer, but a turgid legalese speaking one.
I’m in the camp of reading the first paragraph. If it doesn’t seem like it applies to me then I pitch it. If it sounds like it might then I skim the rest and try to find the important bits.
Sorry, once I encountered the word “turgid”, blood emptied from my brain and re-pooled elsewhere. If it doesn’t autocorrect within 4 hours I will go to the hospital.
If it is from a credit card company, I always interpret it as “we are going to screw you if we can get away with it”. I do a quick scan for any reference that indicates they are going to start charging an annual fee. If I don’t find it, I pitch it.
I get the prospectuses (prospectii?) for the companies I have invested in, which is pure gibberish to me.
Stuff from our financial advisor I always read. It is generally in English - he’s very good about that.
Everything else gets recycled unread.
Regards,
Shodan, party of the first part, beneficiary of the gratuitous bailment, e pluribus unum, non compos mentis, Gallia est omnis divisa in partes tres
Don’t get me started. The community where I live no longer offers recycling. There used to be a big unit where I took glass, cans, and cardboard for recycling. Then they took it away for good due to overuse. Bars and restaurants were bringing their empty bottles and cans and the thing was filling up too quickly.
I took my next load of recyclables to a neighboring community recycling center, but discovered it’s for residents only and if the guy doesn’t recognize you he wants ID and matching mail showing you live in the community.
This pretty much applies to me as well. Credit card letters go to the shredder and the prospectuses ( I looked - your first word was correct according to Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary ) go to the cats, who use it for the litter box. The financial guy provides a concise version of the investments and how they are performing, all in English.
IMHO, the problem with most prospectuses is that they are about 95% disclaimers and 5% interesting information. Yes, this fund is not guaranteed by the FDIC. Yes, it can lose value. Here is another copy of the standard set of risks that you have read ten times before. Past performance does not guarantee future results (really? Who would have thunk it???). Oh, and our fund specializes in small business and agricultural ventures in Southeast Asia and the South Pacific, and holds a significant interest in Solomon Islands Consolidated Fishing Fleet Concern, Ltd. Cool.
Bank stuff I don’t even open. I’ve already got the account or card, and if I see new fees I will take action proportionate to the amount of damns I give at the time. This is irresponsible and will cost me dearly one day.
But I’ve been known to read automobile insurance policies cover to cover and geek on minute differences in coverages & exclusions from my own. Scares me that so many people don’t read their insurance policies.
I did read one once, and figured out it was an attempt to get me to be part of a class action settlement. I think they were required to inform anyone who fit the criteria wanted to deliberately try and limit the number of people who applied. (If you didn’t respond, you were waiving your rights.)
Now, class actions I always read and get aboard. About once a year I’ve been a member in class actions against junk faxers. Four suits, four settlements. My effort involved signing a paper and faxing (heh) it back. Payoffs have each been more than one hundred, less than two.
) go to the cats, who use it for the litter box. The financial guy provides a concise version of the investments and how they are performing, all in English.