Descriptions that do not do the movie justice

Inspired by Left Hand of Dorkness post in http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=357335 about Welcome to the Dollhouse.

A touching look at how one medical professional changed a man’s life. - One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

A woman, consumed by love, who will do anything it takes to get her man. - Fatal Attraction

It was a beautiful day for a parade, and (almost) everyone was invited!

-- *Triumph of the Will*

After a thrilling boat ride some guys get some excitement on the beach.
The Longest Day

also works for Saving Private Ryan

and no doubt others.

This has actually been done here before (sorta):

Not saying it shouldn’t be done again, mind you, but there are some gems in that old one.

A boy grows up to be rich
Citizen Kane

A young man seeks his fortune in the big city
Midnight Cowboy

College life in the 1960’s
Animal House

The struggles of a family, spanning two generations, againt a political backdrop.

  • Star Wars (Both trilogies)

A man gets in touch with his true feelings

- Fight Club
A vacationing family gets a surprise visit from the neighbors

- Funny Games
A lonely and despondent man discovers there’s always someone looking out for him

    • 1984*

Serenity - A large black man chases after a young white girl.
Brokeback Mountain - Two cowboys ride the range.
Farenheit 451 - A fireman learns to read.
A Beautiful Mind - Life story of a math whiz.
King Kong - Out of work actress finds interesting pet.
John Carpenter’s The Thing - ALF in the Antartic.
The Omen - Family and friends deal with unruly child.

Crash: A glimps into a city with a multicultural milieu.

The Miracle Worker- a Yankee woman beats up a blind kid til she talks.*

The Lion in Winter- rich powerful dysfunctional family has issues at Christmas.

Gone With the Wind- selfish silly woman rebounds from Civil War by getting married a lot.

Steel Magnolias- like Barbershop but with white women.

Barber Shop- like Steel Magnolias but with black men.

Harold & Maude- weird kid on old woman in a train car action.

Titanic- Romeo & Juliet on the Titanic (supposedly how the movie was sold to the studio, incidentally).

Return of the Jedi- Empire tries that Death Star thing again. Just as successfully.

The Longest Day- John Wayne saves Europe from Nazis.

On Golden Pond- bickering old couple go to the country.

8 Mile- white guy wants to be a rapper.

Shogun- ‘Lost in Space’ meets ‘The Tempest’

The Bad Seed- Before Ritalin, there was murder.
*[SIZE=1]That was my brother-in-law’s description of it, and he was being serious! He also couldn’t remember the name of Planet of the Apes once so he asked me “What’s the name of that movie where Moses goes to the planet with the talking monkeys and they built their own statue of Liberty or whatever?”

LotR: Two Hobbits find forbiden love while camping in the wilderness

Capote: New Yorker vacations in Kansas

LOTR: Gay midgets return jewelry.
Of course this is a little charming “joke” from Ann Coulter’slatest :

Bolding mine in the above, I should have added.

Thank you for that. Now I’ll be laughing my way through those movies from now on. Damn it.

Resevior Dogs-5 guys look for a rat in a wearhouse.

Kill Bill-A woman wakes up and looks for her lover.

Pulp Fiction-Two guys ride around town with a briefcase.

Casablanca-A drunk meets an old flame againest a political backdrop.

Clerks-A man has a bad day off.

Evil Dead-Bruce Campbell has a fun filled camping trip.

Dawn of the Dead-5 guys decide to live at the local mall.

The Godfather-Family Life is murder on your relationships.

A couple are let in by a helpful stranger.

  • The Rocky Horror Picture Show

Old work buddies get together to plan some fireworks in the bay.

  • The Usual Suspects

I didn’t make this one up; it’s straight from the local paper’s “TVWeek”:

These 2 threads now have more than 700 one-sentence reviews. Many I find laugh-out-loud funny, especially the ones for “Airplane!” and “Speed”. Others I think are dead-on, like for “Birth of a Nation”. For some, I think that the definitive review is still to be written. Hopefully my very few contributions can inspire you to do better…

Casablanca: Cafe owner ponders career change in Africa.
Diary of Anne Frank, The: Teenage girl feels stifled by her family and neighbors.
GoodFellas: Neighborhood pals learn the value of free enterprise.
Ikiru: Dying man experiences second childhood.
In the Realm of the Senses: A couple experiments with variations in lovemaking.
King Kong: Independent filmmaker hires unemployed actress for jungle adventure film.
Top Hat: Young man seeks romance in fascist Italy, despite the stringent socioeconomic controls of his girlfriend’s employer.
Z: A talky plea for peaceful co-existence.

Rosemary’s Baby : A young woman deals with a difficult pregnancy.

*Night of the Living Dead * – stoned again, wandering around with a bad case of the munchies …