My parents told me, and the eye doctor confirmed it, that when I needed to get glasses in third grade, it was just a growing phase I was going through and eventually I wouldn’t need glasses any more. Bastards.
My two older brothers were in high school in the 60’s, when we were living just over the hill from Berkeley. They would smoke dope in their room and burn incense to cover the smell. My mom complained that incense made her sneeze, and could they please not burn incense? So, they stopped doing both.
Fast-forward twenty years. My parents have gone on a trip to Germany and returned with these amazingly kitschy incense burners, which are wooden dolls about a foot tall. You pull the top half off, put a cone of incense right where the stomach would be, light it, and put the top back on. The smoke comes out the doll’s mouth, like it’s smoking. My parents have several of these going 24x7, and give them away for christmas.
Brother: Mom, how come you’re doing this? I thought incense made you sneeze?
Mom: Oh, we just said that to make you stop smoking dope.
Brother: :eek: :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack:
Oh, I should mention… It’s actually “Brother, PhD”.