Years ago my mother was in a dollar store somewhere in Toronto. She came across some of those toilet bowl puck things that make the water blue and picked it up to read the back. She ended up buying a bunch of them because the instructions on the back made her laugh.
Here is a photo of the back of the package.
I love the “Special Notes” section. Just thought I’d share.
That’s awesome! 
You really must submit that to Engrish.com.
I was just going to use the crack basin myself.
I love it!
I’m glad you got the <BLUE> version, which is only affected by hot water and rigidity water, and apparently offs itself. If you got the X-RED-X version, it would try to off you!
Tripler
Not bad for a dollar store pickup, though.
Anyone want some rigidity water cream?
Sign we saw in a toilet in China: “Do not throw useless things to the stool pot. Please erode in time after using.”
Great, there goes my afternoon. When I have no clean laundry tomorrow I’m blaming you.
This one cracks me up! Maybe NSFW?
You know, as trippy as the Chinglish is, you can actually understand most of it. You cut a hole in the box, put the box in your toilet tank, and it cleans and descales your toilet bowl and tank. It won’t work as well if you have hard water (duh), and you should keep it away from children (also duh).
The only thing that’s a little scary is that you have to keep it away from the children “without using the crack basin.”
That one’s going above my bed! 
“protect the enamel from cauterization” :eek: Their farts must be quite impressive (and dangerous)!
We have that rigidity water. I wonder if I could find these around here? Because everyone needs to avoid the crack basin even if they have the rigidity water.
I have to dispute this. I have my own example from a compression gauge manual, key parts of which are entirely undecipherable particularly if, unlike me, you’ve never used one before. I do have to note, though, that the tool itself appears to be fairly well made, all things considered.
The Chinglish on the bowl cleaner package. Not in general.
I agree that your example is too badly mangled to make sense of.
Ah, gotcha.
Awww, that’s so nice that the protecting mirror is named Spark Plug Thing and not Dirty Lose Sucking. How far could it get in life with a name like Dirty Lose Sucking?
I dunno, there’s something to be said for dirty lose sucking. 
Good point.
You know, I wonder if the chainsaw and weedwacker would be easier to start if they didn’t each have an angry valve in the choke. Suppose I could get it replaced with a happy or calm one?
NPR did a piece on knockoffs not too long ago, and they pointed out that some of them are very high quality, and well worth what you’re paying for them, even if they do say “Lolex” on them. If the Chinese can just figure out that melamine is not a food additive, they’ll give the Japanese something to worry about.
