I really don’t understand your post. It’s growth in that you support your significant other. What the hell ME-FIRST means, I don’t understand at all.
We both support each other in our endeavors. And we both grow from it. Please don’t thread shit on me for supporting my wife.
sorry if my post offended you - as that was not my intention …
I guess what I wanted to convey was: Depending on where you stand, that situation can be both a dream come true or a nightmare.
Like several other responders, my wife and I are empty-nesters rather than DINKs.
But for what it’s worth: she designs and makes clothing and other fabric creations.
And I have always been a fairly serious musician… was pro for a while before I gave in to the money in the software racket. These days I do a lot of recording of original material in collaboration with other old musician friends. My wife has a good voice and often does vocals on our work. Can’t say I help much with the sewing and fabric work… though I try to help when asked.
I guess the thing is, there’s no point in ‘wanting to want to be interested’ in things?
You need to find something that grabs you. I don’t really know how one would do that if you don’t already have a skill or hobby.
Maybe read a lot, watch videos about a wide variety of things?
At some point perhaps you will encounter something that makes you think: gosh, I’d like to know more about that…?
Apology accepted. And accept one from me as well. I was being thin skinned. Perhaps I need to work on a little personal growth 
My wifes involvement in things like triathlons taught us both a lot. We each saw the other side of the coin. My wife knew that it was rough on me too. And after one race, surprised me with a trip to go to Europe for 3 weeks. She had it all planned out (and mostly paid for). She knew it was on my bucket list. We had a great time.
We make a good team.
And really, this is a good thread. Many of us here are at that age. Ya don’t want to wonder what to do when all of a sudden you’re not working anymore.
Allow me to suggest trying to learn a new language. True fluency has a high ceiling, you can work on it both separately and together, you can meet other people who speak the language, and you can potentially use it when traveling.
My wife and I met in our late 40s, and we’re now in our early 60s, no kids, both still working (at least for a few more years). We both ski, hike, kayak, and bike; so that fills a lot of our time. We each have separate non-athletic hobbies (pottery, mosaics) and home projects. We travel a lot and plan to spend more time traveling as our work winds down.
We are open to new activites (kayaking, mountain biking) that spice things up. Adapting new aspects of old hobbies (hut-to-hut hiking, cat/heli skiing) makes things interesting and we have the money now to make it happen. I find that we’re always looking at what activities we can do with friends and family, especially travel.
I guess my question to the OP is "what do you mean by “personal growth”?
People need something that gives them a sense of purpose. That could be raising a family, their career, a particular interest or artistic pursuit. I also believe that people need to feel connected with a community or feel they have a place in it. Otherwise you just sort of exist to keep yourself busy filling your time with hobbies and whatnot.
Any of the topics the OP mentioned - travel, board games, raising animals, kayaking, mountain biking, martial arts, history (native American or otherwise), welding, blacksmithing, art, guitar, nature shit, math, signing, even video games - have the potential for long-term deep learning and development with the potential for a social collaborative component.
But I get a sense from the OP that they are someone who tends to jump around to different things a lot and maybe likes the “idea” of things more than feeling a strong desire to delve deeply into any of these activities.
One theory I have is that maybe as the OP is in his 40s (not “old” but certainly “older”) , he has a bit more of a sense of urgency about how he spends his time and wants that time to be more meaningful?
We retired at about the same time, and decided to move to a smaller community, away from where we had worked. We’re both still making or solidifying friendships, some mutual, some individual. We both enjoy walking on trails, and we both enjoy travel. We travel both together and separately (I alone, she with other people). We both like to cook and trade it off. We’ll be gardening in a couple of weeks. I write, she sews. We enjoy “parallel play” where each of us does our own thing, but we’re both in the house. We watch some television in common, but she likes it more than I do. She likes music but forgets to put it on; I put music on. I’m teaching a community college class for fun (it sure isn’t for the $), and she took a class on cheesemaking. It works.
Yeah, that’s probably fair. I’d prefer a less… hedonistic… lifestyle than what I currently have. Through my 20s, I was a pillar in various communities, co-leading a few non-profits, getting groups together for outdoor trips, game nights, potlucks, music jams, etc. Lots of friends and a very full life. That was easy in a vibrant college town. The demands of adult life through my early 30s took a small toll on that, but I was still able to keep enough of it up. It wasn’t until recently, with a combination of a serious relationship, moving to a semi-rural town, and leaving the nonprofit world, that life seemed to become more of a “series of unrelated activities” rather than a cohesive vision. Overall I’m more content and less unsettled, the relationship being a huge part of that, but I do feel somewhat adrift without a central purpose driving me forward. I miss that feeling of working towards something bigger than myself and my immediate circle, and as you said, I end up trying to pad that void with various keep-busy activities.
The town I live in now is bit too wealthy and touristy for my liking, with a strong ski/bike/outdoor rec culture, but not so much of an activist / conservationist / sciency / educational focus. There’s a few nonprofits here, including the museum I volunteer for, but the job market isn’t so hot and I keep having to fall back on my random tech skills — which were never my passion, just a way to pay the bills. Moving isn’t an option right now (her job and education require us to be here), so I just have to find ways to make do in the meantime.
It’s still a good situation, overall, and I’m grateful for what I have. Adulting is a series of tradeoffs, after all 
I’m not looking to overhaul my whole life, just make some small tweaks… e.g. less screen time, more _______ would be nice. Especially something that could simultaneously fill the needs of community, skill development, and intellectual stimulation.
I’m going to seriously investigate the woodworking idea.
Another language is great idea too… I currently speak 2.5, and would like to get better at the 0.5 and add a 4th, but it’s so, so hard without immersion and constant practice. The local community college offers classes, but at pretty inconvenient times.