I nominate CKY’s Skelator Vs Beastman.
Lyrics provided below.
[spoiler]Now get outta here.
huuh, you fool get the fuck out!
mmhhhm
You ready?
You Goddamn better believe it.[/spoiler]
Brandon Cruz, formerly of “The Courtship of Eddie’s Father” became a singer in a punk band called Dr. Know, and penned the wonderful song “Fist F*ck”
Hit 'em up by 2Pac?
Get Naked by Methods of Mayhem?
Mr Bungles Squeeze Me, Macaroni is always my vote. The only words I comprehended the first pass through was “Knick knack paddywhack, and give your dog a bone”, which takes on new meaning when you read the lyrics (which aren’t about bestiality but that interpretation does round out the song.)
Little Susie Shallow Throat by David Allan Coe
Little Susie Shallow Throat was lonely
All the girls all made fun of her at school
‘Cause no matter how she tried
She could not get a dick inside
Her shallow throat
Shallow throat
My Ding-A-Ling Chuck Berry 
The Good Ship Venus, in any of its various iterations; my favourite can be found here: [noparse]http://ismaels.wordpress.com/2009/04/12/rogue’s-gallery-the-art-of-the-siren-25/[/noparse] (NSFW, some censored nudity), sung by Loudon Wainwright III. It’s basically a collection of exceedingly smutty naval-themed limericks put to music.
Please confine all song quotes to about one verse, folks. Thanks. If you want to show the full song, the way to go is to link to a page with the lyrics.
“I’ve been so Mad Lately” by the truly awesome but truly terrible punk band Butt Trumpet. The first verse goes a little like this:
Shit fuck hell damn shit fuck shit
FUCK!
Shit-for-brains asshole dickweed lowlife!
You’re a motherfucker and I hate you
Fuck shit hell damn shit fuck!
Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you
Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you
I’m pissed
I’m pissed
I’m so pissed off
I’m so fucking pissed!
How about Adam Sandler’s At a Medium Pace?
Sigh. All of the respect and the new image I’ve tried to help give rap on these boards now gets wiped out in one foul, and I do mean foul, swoop…
Afroman - Crazy Rap(Colt 45) ; Lyrics
I met this lady in Hollywood. She had green hair, but damn she looked good.
I took her to my house, cause she was fine, but she whipped out a dick that was bigger than mine.
I met this lady from Japan, never made love with an African.
I fucked her once, I fucked her twice. I ate that pussy like shrimp fried rice.
Don’t be amazed at the stories I tell ya. I met a woman in the heart of Australia.
Had a big butt and big titties, too, so I hopped in her ass like a kangaroo.
See, I met this lady from Hawaii. Stuck it in her ass, and she said, Aiiiiieeee!
Lips was breakfast, pussy was lunch, then her titties busted open with Hawaiian Punch.
Met Colonel Sander’s wife in the state of Kentucky. She said, I’ll fry some chicken if you just fuck me.
I came in her mouth. It was a crisis. I gave her my secret blend of herbs and spices.
Living Legends - Addicted; Lyrics
I bought the brand new Mac, the high speed Internet
The dual-drives in the back, it’s lots of power like crack
I’m addicted to these sites with the free pics, the tight ones
Lots of categories, point your arrow, they’re a light sum
I zone out in the web world of triple-X
I never knew what a MILF was 'till I seen it, Yes!
I like the Indian sites, forbidden paradise
The red-dot special hoes, black sheep, said it ripe
I like the “BangBus” and “8th Street Latinas”
Tricking amateurs out, avoiding misdemeanors
Flash the cash, they get in
Bash those, kick 'em out
Throw clothes to the floor, next girl on the route, hey!
I’m hella picky, I click off girls quickly
Don’t like them shaved and prickly, no pre-pubescence, icky
That’s a NO-NO!
Grow those hairy creampies
I love the “Big Naturals” and the smooth, thick thighs
I’ll save the lyrics(they’re easy enough to understand anyway), in favor a multiple songs, but while Too $hort was/is good(or bad), Akinyele’s Aktapuss is the definitive dirty rap album. While his range is narrow, he does have some really funny/witty lines.
Akinyele - Juan Valdez, Love; Put It In My Mouth; Take A Lick
okay, no video, so some quick lyrics from the song Three…
Ha! did ginger and marianne ever hit the skipper?
The three’s company chicks ever fuck jack tripper?
Did orca and jaws ever run up in flipper?
Did that spud dog ever fuck them three frog bud
Sippers?
Huh, that’s outlandish shit
Two guys dancin with one girl, that’s that sandwich
Shit
Was wyclef and praswell scorin on lauryn?
Was lil’ cease and un hittin lil’ kim?
Did red alert and scale ever fuck wendy well?
Did ak and flex ever fuck jess and stress?
Shit, we can take it down the alphabets
Did swv get with tlc
And fuck them three fellas down with bbd?
Remember mike bivins, abc
They had more than three
But if they cut a few
Would they fuck them three girls from 702?
Would erykah badu fuck them two righteous dudes
>from the brand nubian crew and include grand pu?
Did mary j. blige ever fuck case and nas?
Was arnold or willis ever comin on kimberly
Drummond?
Check it, remember this record:
And when i’m cool like that, i’m cool like that
I don’t know they name, damn it
But i wonder did them niggas ever ram it
In that girl from digable planets?
I don’t know about being one of the dirtiest songs ever, but I’ve always found it horrifying that a band called the Dead Kennedys had a song called “Too Drunk to Fuck.”
And in looking up the lyrics, I find it’s not only nauseating, it’s misogynistic!
But in my room
Wish you were dead
You ball like the baby
In Eraserhead
:eek:
2 Live Crew’s A F*** is a F***:
[Spoiler]I got plenty many bitches to Move Somethin’ (Yeah!)
I gots no time for silly games
So it’s up to you, either hang on or stroll on!
Only real bitches, not sorry lames (Ha ha!)
If that’s what you want, you’re shit out of luck
(My man ain’t got no time for no motherfuckin’ woman!)
I’m out for the pussy 'cause a fuck is a fuck! (Fool!)
A fuck is a fuck, NIGGA!
A fuck is a fuck, HOE![/spoiler]
…and there’s plenty more where that came from, in that particular song and in their larger oeuvre.
Sunshine, lollipops and rainbows,
Everything that’s wonderful is what I feel when we’re together,
Brighter than a lucky penny,
When you’re near the rain cloud disappears, dear,
And I feel so fine just to know that you are mine.
OK, maybe not.
And now, for something with some class:
Alberta Hunter “My Man is Such a Handy Man”
…and there’s lots more glorious music where that came from…
Not “dirty” in the in-your-face “fuck” and swearing way, but pretty out there nonetheless… two songs by Nightwish
[spoiler]Touch my milklike skin
Feel the ocean
Lick my deepest
Hear the starry choir
…
Old love lies deep you said
Deeper shall be the wound between your legs[/spoiler]
[spoiler]Drink from my thighs
The rain of lies
…
Naked limbs reflecting from the moon
I’ll be there for you soon
First wish for this night:
Let me be your delight[/spoiler]
The dirtiest song that doesn’t contain a single dirty word:
Brand New Key, by Melanie
Khia - My Neck, My Back
[spoiler]Lick this, just like you should
Right now, Lick it good
Lick this just like you should
My Neck, my back
Lick my pussy and my crack
[/spoiler]
Ludacris - My Fantasy
[spoiler]I wanna get you in the Georgia Dome on the fifty yard line
While the Dirty Birds kick for t’ree
And if you like in the club we can do it
In the DJ booth or in the back of the V.I.P.
Whipped cream with cherries and strawberries on top
Lick it don’t stop, keep the door locked don’t knock while the boat rock
[/spoiler]
Eazy-E - Gimme that Nutt
[spoiler]I took her to tha pad and we started tah kiss
Now my dick’s on hard ya know what I’m thinkin’
Took tha panties off and the pussy wasn’t stinkin’
Pulled off my draws and we started to begin
Now tha pussy’s wet so my dick slides in
Oh, hiddy hiddy hiddy you hoe
Ridin’ from the back so I’m fuckin’ kinda slow
http://www.lyrics007.com/Eazy%20E%20Lyrics/GIMME%20THAT%20NUTT%20Lyrics.html
[/spoiler]
And Cannibal Corpse is all around dirty and disgusting…won’t even inline anything. Beware if you click… CANNIBAL CORPSE lyrics
DJ Assault’s Dick by the pound is the raunchiest duet I know.
listen (audio, NSFW)!
excerpt:
“My dick can take a break
and I’ll make your legs shake
'cuz I’ma lick you with my tongue
and get your ass [something]”