(CAVEATS I know many of you simply hate these threads…and I am fully aware “race” is a mostly bogus concept in scientific usage. I am talking about ethno-social groups as defined by mainstream North American society. Personally I don’t like these categories much. And I know one or two black people can’t speak for 35 or 40 million of people. Furthermore, I guarantee I will say at least three or four stupid things here).
Anyway, there is a lot in the media, films, popular culture about the fact that many black women feel there is a ‘shortage’ of black men - as growing numbers of black men date primarily women that are not black. Just from my own observation, I rarely see black women with men that are not black.
One reason I have heard, especially as it regards to white men, is that many black women are very sensitive about the history of being sexually exploited in the past. Is this something that is openly discussed by a lot of black women, or just some sociological theory heard in academic circles? Also, in the past black women were viewed as unattractive by many other people - I mean some people even today say things like “good hair” for straight hair, or prize thin lips and light skin. Yet, there is no shortage of black female sex symbols today.
Also, I think many non-black men have sexual stereotypes that black women expect things out of a lover that white men can’t often provide, or are otherwise “different” sexually…as the Rolling Stones’ “Some Girls” said:
“Black girls just wanna get f*cked all night
I just don’t have that much jam”
Yes this is a really stupid line from a silly song, but it seems to be a common ‘locker room’ type view. And I am sure many black women are wary for that very reason.
Anyway, today there are many black man/white woman couples, white man/Asian woman couples, quite a few Asian woman/black man or Asian man/white woman coupls, and Hispanic (who really can be any race or any mixture of races) with non-Hispanic white/black partners…but black women just don’t seem to date others that often.
And I haven’t even brought up gay or Lesbian couples…