Ah, ok. But he’s not a “Nice Guy”. He’s a cyborg. Its even in his name. 
Again, they are discussing me. As a rule, most men earning >30K/y can find a girlfriend. Most men earning >60K/y can find a girlfriend even if they are very antifeminist.
I am not a “nice guy” – I am not looking for female friends.
Oh sure, blame the cyborgs.
This is totally absurd. Totally and utterly.
Most prominent anti feminists do have wives or long time partners.
I mean, can we state the obvious here? Nice guys often end up with nice girls. I don’t mean ‘‘nice’’ in the euphemistic way but in the sense that you are compassionate, considerate of others, and yeah maybe a little shy.
That seems to hold pretty consistently across the board for all the fantastic men I know. There are very few couples I’m friends with where one is an obvious dick. People tend to attract people like themselves.
So sure, if your goal in life is to get a girlfriend who values money above all else, knock yourself out becoming rich and powerful. For some people that’s not even a bad thing, because they will find someone who embraces the thing they value most – money – and it can be a good match. Just recognize a lot of people value a lot of different things other than money and if you truly and openly embrace your own values you will probably attract a partner who values those same things.
Oops. I feel kinda silly. I misread that post. Apologies.
I made it very clear to my GF in the beginning stages of our relationship: If the shit ever goes down, don’t expect me to go full on Chuck Norris defending your honor. I will grab you hand and we’re running as fast as we can.
We laughed, and she still manages to keep me around. So I assume she accepts me in my supposed “Unmanlyness”.
Everything is OK. Not having money means not having many types of relationships – I had recently quit my relationship with my therapist. In many ways, romantic partnership as well as therapeutic partnership does have financial side.
All the women I’ve had relationships though I was a nice guy. They liked that I treated them like human beings, and took an interest in what they had to say.
Unless you are living out of a shopping buggy finances aren’t keeping you single.
I’ve not had trouble even when I was dirt poor. Flexing the pecs make them swoon. And taking at least a weekly shower.
Um. I must commend you on your user name, Sir. I am a fan of cephalopods.
I guess dating for Autistic people is another topic. I do not date. I do not drive.
One of my red flags when dating is if a woman doesn’t seem to value a man being nice. I also expect a woman to be nice. I have no problem sticking up for a woman in any situation but I have no respect for women who don’t try to avoid these situations.
[del]You stay down now, Mr. Swedish Champion[/del] Sorry, wrong thread.
Nope. This subject is about played-out.
From my observation, there’s also a religious demographic: Christian women are significantly more likely than non-Christian women to go for nice guys. In fact this may be true of religious vs. non-religious women in general.
I think it’s partially a stage of life issue. “Nice guy” syndrome is especially prevalent among teenage to early twenties men. “Nice guys” go hand in hand with the “girls only date JERKS because they’re stupid” idea. The thing is, they’re not completely wrong.
A lot of young people of both sexes are pretty terrible at picking good partners. What “Nice guys” really fail at is turning the lens on themselves. I’ve never met a “nice guy” willing to seriously consider that they’re not pursing the type of women who appreciates kind, thoughtful partners. In fact, “Nice guys” are usually super desperate and open to pursuing any women who’ll pay them any attention. Yet, somehow it’s only women don’t appreciate traits like niceness.
There isn’t any contradiction between actually being nice and being confident, and actually being nice gives women a sense of protection. The whole ‘nice guys’ complaint has a whole lot of fallacies behind it. If a guy is actually nice and not attracting women, he’s probably not making a real effort (most of the ‘assholes’ who score a lot also get rejected more times in a month than the nice guy does in his life) or is socializing badly in some way. Neither of those are actually a direct result of being ‘nice’. And a huge chunk of the people who call themselves ‘nice guys’ are actually not nice at all, and view women as a sort of video game where you keep putting in niceness tokens until you win a sexing (or loving or whatever).
You should read this page to get a good deconstruction of the nice guy fallacies: http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/ng.shtml
Evolutionary psychology is a great steaming pile of crap, it’s just people tossing out pseudo-scientific babble to support their existing prejudices. I’ve never seen the kind of evo-psych that supports ‘nice guy’ complaints supported by any real research or critical thinking. The most common failure of critical thinking is taking some 20th century social conventions and ‘proving’ that they must have come from evolution because reasons, and never addressing why people didn’t behave that way through the rest of recorded history. And Youtube comments are a swirling cesspool of broken people, it’s a terrible place to get ideas from.
Could be that “nice guys” are differentially attracted to damaged women–i.e., ones in a series of dysfunctional relationships. The nice guys think they can swoop in and fix things just by being nice, which of course they can’t. So almost by definition, the women they are attracted to won’t return the affections, because the women are attracted to abusive men.
Nah, they’re attracted to all kinds except the kind that’s stronger than them in any fashion.