I don’t care what your relationship is to them. I don’t care if you are besties, close blood relatives, their spiritual advisor, whatever.
JUST DON’T DO IT.
Yesterday was a beautiful day, and I had a spurt of energy and decided to tackle those ‘spring cleaning’ chores I’d been ignoring. I started with the idea of washing the insides of all the windows of the first floor. Which inspired me to take down all the associated drapes and hang them outside for a good airing/dust shaking free in the sun and wind.
And then the sheers. I got them all down, too, and put to soak in the bath tub for a while. And then figured, why not do a really good job of vacuuming the baseboard radiators? God know how much dust has accumulated on them. This entailed pulling many pieces of furniture well away from walls for access, which in turn meant unloading several shelves of five cabinets and bookcases to make them light enough and safe to move. All that stuff got piled onto every end table and couch and chair and ottoman and coffee table, safely out of the way. Finally I was able to remove the radiator covers to access the fins.
Oh, and since I now had clear access to the walls, I really might as well take down all the wall pictures and other hanging stuff. Good dusting and polishing of the glass covers clearly needed before I hang them back.
Oh, the sheers had soaked long enough, get the first load into the washing machine. It took three loads to avoid extra creasing.
I came back up from the basement laundry to find someone pounding on my door. Really? I was by then dirty, sweaty, and in no mood to deal with whoever. I ignored it.
The pounding continued. And, i see peering in my now naked dining room windows are one of my nieces and her brood of four children! Guess I can’t pretend I’m not home, eh?
So I opened the door. “Oh, there you are,” chirped Lark. (Not her name, but fits with the chirpy attitude.) "We’ve been on a shopping trip to (local giant enclosed mall) and I thought ‘We should stop by Aunt Starving’s since we’re only a couple miles away!’ "
Now, Lark is nice, and her kids are, on the whole, better behaved than many these days, but it was nearly 11:30 and I was in no mood to entertain anybody because I’ve got to get all my projects done and the house put back together so I could collapse into bed and I’m pretty sure I don’t even have enough lunch type food on hand to feed five extra people and in fact THERE IS NOWHERE TO SIT DOWN on the entire first floor of the house. (Okay, the toilet is still accessible.)
I told her “Sorry, you all can’t come in now. I’m too busy.”
Lark was shocked. “But the kids hardly get to see you!” This is true. Their house is a good 45 minute drive away, even when the traffic is light. “And we’re already here!”
“That’s too bad. But as you can see, I’m in the middle of cleaning, everything is a mess, and if I stop I’ll never get finished.”
“Oh, we don’t mind a little mess! They’ve been so good while I shopped and they really need to run around and get their energy out. And they’re getting hungry–”
“Nope, can’t do it. Why don’t you go to McDonalds? There one just two miles from here. And then take them to a park or something.”
She stared at me incredulously. “I can’t believe you don’t want to see my children!”
“Sorry, it’s just impossible right now. Another time. Goodbye.”
“But they need to use the bathroom!”
“McDonald’s have bathrooms.” And I shut the door in her face.
Okay, pretty rude. But so is simply ‘dropping in’ on people. Other people have lives too, you know? I bet very few people are ready to feed and entertain guests at every random moment every random day. They may have plans, they may be sick, they might be fighting deadlines, they may be busy with a million other things. Phones were invented for a reason!
