It’s interesting that even in a world of wizards, psychics are flakes! 
FTR, Dobby is the only house-elf alleged to have worn a tea-cozy. He wore [wears] it as a hat.
True, but my point was that house-elves wear clothing substitutes - if they have no genitalia, why do they need to cover themselves up? You’d assume they’d wear nothing unless given clothes and set free.
Just making the point tat Dobby’s tea-cozy was a proud article of clothing he obtained for himeslf upon acquiring his freedom. He didn’t wear it for modesty’s sake.
I do agree, however, that genital-related modesty is the purpose for the scraps of cloth with which most house-elves bedeck themselves.
Y’all are cracking me up. I love bad pairings (Ron/Giant Squid comes to mind, also Sirius/Buckbeak and Grawp/Hermione) not because I want to actually read them, but because their existence gives me hours of amusement.
I can’t help but read of Grawp/Hermione and Snape/house elf and think of this thread.
Yeah, you’ll be sorry you heard about that, too. :eek:
To be fair, that one was actually suggested in Half-Blood Prince (spoiler that follows is very minor):
Ron ends up dating Lavender Brown for a while (sheesh, man, have you no taste at all?), who turns out to be very clingy, in more sense than one. He comments at one point (after he’s beginning to tire of the relationship, but before he can get up the gumption to just end it) that it’s like dating the giant squid.I can’t really blame some anonymous fan for taking that and running with it.
Oh, someone already has. (To an extent. It’s not really dirty at all, but prolly not work safe, just to be on the safe side…)
Not a bad pairing at all . . . so long as it’s a young, firm, farm-fresh PRAIRIE SQUID! 
http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/hallscience/X0090_WhencePrairieSquid.html
So does that mean if I write a Dobby/Hermione fic called “Womb for S.P.E.W.” you’re not going to read it? aww. 
Aw, I’ll check it out before recoiling in horror and scooping out my eyeballs with an ice cream scooper.