I don’t live with him, but my dad does this. It’s one thing in his living room, he’s fairly ignorable since nothing he says really requires a response. But I went to a movie with my parents for the first time since I was a kid (and the last time!) in 1998. He did the same as in the living room, but in a packed theater. I was livid. Never again.
I’m even worse. I hate movies, despise actors, and have absolutely zero suspension of belief. I call bullshit when I see it, which is rife in movies, so I gave up on them for the sake of my credulous companions.
Gah your BIL sounds like a PITA!! :smack:
The only thing I do is when driving in rural hilly country every time I see a sign saying “DO NOT PASS” I launch into a monologue about the famous missions of Colonel Beauregard Do-Not who originally explored this area in 1822 and for whom this pass between hills is named. A truly heroic character, his exploits span our fair nation and serve as a beacon of progress and enlightenment for us all. All hail Colonel Do-Not!
No really, it’s a pretty good schtick. You oughta hear it! 
:eek:
My cousin is the one who knows all the actors. Most of them. It almost seems like they are his friends.
“Oh look, it’s Tondelea Vintemiglio, I had no idea she was in this,” which affects his personal assessment of how good the movie is.
“Who is that?”
“It’s Murgatroid von Himmelfarb.”
“What do I know him from? He looks familiar.”
Or the ever popular, “Ignace T. Groën is in this. I don’t want to watch any movie with him in it.”
Bwahaha. Did you ever see the movie “Forget Paris”?
May I borrow that phrase for this holiday season and perhaps for future use?
I will gladly pay a royalty to you for each inane question asked by my guests and people around me while watching a movie in a theater.
STFU and watch the film. Your popcorn munching and soda straw slurping is MUCH less irritating.
(all said in good humor)
I seem to suffer a somewhat opposite fate. The people I usually watch movies with tend to miss half of what happens onscreen.
“Why’s he doing that?”
Because such-and-such happened in the previous scene.
“It did? I don’t remember that.”
[Rewind DVD to show that sure enough, such-and-such did indeed happen just five minutes ago.]
Thinking to self – how can you sit there watching this and fail to notice what was right in front of your eyes?
My daughter is awful with movies. She’s just about eight and refuses to watch movies. If she hears we’re watching ANY movie, she’ll loudly proclaim “I DON’T LIKE MOVIES!!!” and storm to her room. But then…anywhere from ten minutes to an hour later she’ll come out. “What’s going on?” “Who’s that?” “Why’s he doing that?” And it’s like omg you want us to just start it over for you? “I don’t like MOVIES!”
Little Jim…Little Jim!!
Oh yeah, I failed to mention, Dad is also a slightly hard of hearing loud talker. He’s not speaking in hushed tones to the crowd. He’s doing the loud talking on the phone voice.
"Haha, he’s gonna REGRET THAT LATER !!!
Ugh.
No, only when watching small screen entertainment. Weird, but I think it’s a family habit - watching TV/movies on TV must be a sort of social event - when I visit them, they all do it - it’s like trying to watch TV in a chicken house.
My mother is like that. She doesn’t care at all about the story-line, or the photography, or the dialog or the direction. Her only purpose in watching a movie is to be able to identify the actors. And as soon as she identifies them, she has to vocalize it. If she’s not sure, then she’ll start asking, “Is that so-and-so? Is that that really so-and-so? Look at how young she is. Wasn’t she also in such-and-such? I can’t believe how young she looks,” etc. Meanwhile, the characters are revealing the major plot point to the whole film, and she isn’t even listening.
I myself don’t care a rat’s ass who the actors are, so I’ll be damned before I watch a movie with her.
I sat in front of two for Star Wars: The Force Awakens. When the credit came up for Lucasfilm one of them said, “George Lucas.” I immediately surmised it wouldn’t be fun so I moved.
With pleasure! Consider it a late Christmas gift.
Oh yes, this happens regularly.
What I am surprised about is that so far, no one has discussed multi-tasking when watching movies or bingeing a series at home. My wife likes puzzle apps - wordgames, sudoku, etc. - and will work on those while watching.
So take all of those and add: “Wait - what just happened?!” “How’d they end up in a car?”, “What caused that explosion?!”, etc.
:smack:
You are me, except it’s a cell phone. And even the freakin’ glow from the phone distracts me while trying to watch a movie. When I mention it she clicks her tongue and rolls her eyes.
And then asks me to fill in some detail in the movie she had missed.
mmm
Yep. Morgan Freeman lives in the spare room I have. He’s a pretty cool guy, but he burps and farts a lot.
It’s even better when you’ve been watching a TV series for a significant length of time and the “who’s that?” is directed at the main character. Um . . . the guy whose life story we’ve been following for multiple weeks now? (I watch TV late at night with people who fall asleep halfway through, so sometimes it feels like a minority of people on the couch are aware of the overall basic story).
Your comment reminded me of this George Orwell essay - he talks about the “continuous story” that ran in his head until age 25. Feel special! Or crazy. 
At home, my wife tends to be doing multiple things at once and not giving full attention to the movie so she will have questions that to me (who has been only watching the movie for the past 90 minutes) are incredibly silly. To me that’s just disrespectful, both to our shared activity and to the movie itself.
That’s why I love going to the movies, that way we are both concentrating on the movie at hand. Very rarely will the movie theatre movie end and she’ll have questions about what she just saw.
I do this to my husband occasionally - but this is because he insists on starting to watch TV and/or movies while I am conducting mission-critical tasks in another room - such as starting to cook the dinner he has declared he is starving for. And then he has the the stones to get annoyed when I request a plot update because I have been in the kitchen making dinner and could neither see nor hear the TV.
If he could just hold his freaking water with starting the show for 10 goddamn minutes. . .