When I shake a woman’s hand, I look them straight in the eye and vary the level of pressure to match theirs. I give a small smile but make sure it does not make it all the way to my eyes.
When I shake a man’s hand, I make it a good, firm shake. I also make sure I look in their eyes. I will also tend to widen my eyes into a doe-like stance and smile with full dimples and teeth. (While the recipient usually checks out my rack.)
I have found that in the workplace, this is the best way to open doors when you first meet people. The sexes do react differently.
I shake everyone’s hand pretty much the same. I do hate it when a person- usually a woman, in my experience- just grabs my fingers; I can’t end the shake and let go quickly enough. Although, my grandfather used to shake this way all the time. I also don’t like when someone- usually a guy in this case- gives me the dead-fish shake. I hang onto it and shake even more firmly than I do normally, as if trying to wordlessly communicate with the guy and let him know how flimsy he feels with that kind of shake, in the hopes that he’ll be embarrassed by the difference in firmness between his hand and mine, and change his ways.
I’m working now on teaching my young daughters how to give a good firm handshake.
i don’t why women do that limp-wrist thing. it’s annoying as hell to be on the receiving end - and i’m a woman.
i generally match the pressure of the other’s shake and keep it business-like. maybe a bit more pressure with men than with women. i’m 5’ 9" barefoot and even with just a two-inch heel on, it still towers me over most people.
to date, businessmen and women have always dispensed with the nonsense while shaking my hand, so either i’m lucky or just fortunate in the workplace.
I shake exactly the same with men as women, but probably end up shaking men’s hands harder since they are usually more into the grip and up-and-down part. (Gee that sounds naughty.) If I get a limp fish I try and give them a Grip of Death, or whatever my puny little lady-hand can approximate.
perfectparanoia, doe eyes to the men? Rigid half-smile for women? You sound a little passive aggressive. Or paranoid.
In addition to the limp-wrist ded fish shake, some women offer their hand at a weird angle that doesn’t allow for a normal shake. It’s almost like they are expecting that I want to kiss their hand, very odd.
I’m a female, and I shake men’s hands much harder than other women’s (not like a vice grip or with intent to injure, but PLENTY firm and decisive). I figure men are more used to guys trying to outsqueeze them, so it won’t hurt them, and it’ll make me stand out as a take-charge, ballsy kind of person. It hasn’t hurt me yet. Usually when I shake hands with women, they shake very weakly. So I make sure my ladyshake is firm, but not nearly as firm as my dudeshake (because I don’t want to hurt them).
I offer both genders a firm handshake, but with men I make certain to return what they give. THere is a small group of guys who seem to thrive on trying to dominate via the handshake. I don’t take well to douchebag aggressive hand crushers and have no problem squeezing back hard. I’ve never had a woman try to crush my hand so I always off them a light, firm handshake.
Since I mostly shake hands with older people I give most people a soft hand shake. If any man tried to give me a hand grinding handshake I hope I would have enough presence of mind to drop to the floor crying and screaming.
Normally I would shake a women’s hand softer then I would a mans. This is more a function of where I encounter women that I’m shaking hands with.
I work in the trades a firm handshake is the standard. If I were shaking hands with a female plumber or electrician they would still receive a firm handshake but if I’m shaking hands with a female customer I’m going to be less firm. Females in the trades are very rare however so my vote was I shake men and women’s hands differently.
The same tends to apply to men though, except with men in non physical jobs it’s more of a judgment call.