My brother is 5’11 and weighs 220. He has 1 beer when he get’s home from work, 2 beers with his dinner 2 hours later, and 2 beers before he goes to bed (about 4 hours after dinner.) That’s 5 beers spread over the course of 6 hours. He does this every single day, and has for almost 20 years now.
I’ve never known him to drink more than that in a 24 hour period. For his size and weight, 5 brews over 6 hours is not going to give him much of a buzz. However, my sister in law insists that because he drinks that much every day, even if he isn’t getting drunk, or even a buzz, this makes him an alcoholic. I think shes nuts. After all, isn’t the entire problem with alcoholics the fact that they get intoxicated on a regular basis? My brothers drinking never brings him anywhere near to being drunk. According to my sister in laws theory, I guess anyone who ever drinks on a regular basis, even 1 beer after work every day, is an alcoholic, because “it’s the habit that counts, not the blood alcohol level” (her words :rolleyes: ) Can anyone comment on this.
Can he stop drinking?
He may very well be an acoholic, by AA’s definition. :rolleyes:
Hogwash. Is his use of alcohol creating or contributing to problems in his life? If not, the amount of alcohol, nor its frequency of use, in and of themselves, are not an indicator of alcoholism. They could lead to alcoholism, however. AA recognizes that some people can drink alcohol without ill effect, and some cannot.
His use of alcohol is creating no problems. It’s his habitual use of it is what my sis-in-law insists is a problem. Other than his scheduled beers, I know of him drinking at no other time. He hasn’t even been out to a bar in a long, long, time.
The key is indeed can he stop drinking…
An alcoholic DEPENDS on alcohol. Why does he drink. To forget…He is an alcoholic…To sleep…To relax…He is an alcoholic.
If he can achieve thoses things on a regular basis w/o alcohol he isn’t.
I read a great book called the “OSTRICH SYNDROME”
It pointed out how many things we can’t do and how fear increases our dependency.
For instance if you can’t walk into a store and ask for change without buying something you have a problem. Doesn’t look like it, you can go your whole life and not address it…But that doesn’t mean you don’t have one.
I am afraid to fly. I doubt I will ever need to fly…So in reality I don’t have a problem, but actually I do.
So you see it applies to alcohold to.
That is why we have a nation of overweight people. They use food for comfort instead of fuel
I agree mostly with the theory of the drinking isn’t a problem unless it inhibits daily function in some way. If he becomes incapacitated or in any way unable to function normally with the every-day alcohol consumption then he’s definitely an alcoholic. On the same note, if he otherwise seems normal but can’t get relaxed at night without the alcohol, there’s probably some kind of problem in that case too. Just because he can function “normally” with that amount of alcohol in his system doesn’t mean there isn’t a problem. Having grown up with an alcoholic grandfather and an alcoholic uncle, I do know that daily alcohol consumption can do great damage both mentally and physically.
Another question in this line is not only can he or is he willing to stop, but is it an issue in his marriage. If you’ve debated this with his wife, it sounds like there may be a larger issue here. If it bothers her, then there may be more in jeopardy than just a debate. If it comes down to it, challenge your brother to a week of drinking near-beer instead of the real stuff. Kinda like asking a coffee addict to switch to decaf, but if there are medical issues involved, perhaps he can be convinced to try it. Perhaps printing off a list from a medical site with all the nice things alcohol does to his body will help convince him (and you).
(Raises hand)
Practising alcoholic here. Your compatriot seems to fit none of the major facets of alcoholism as I personally know them, with the possible exception of “regulation,” the “I’ll get that bastard in the program no matter what” symptom.
Let me be the first drunk to tell you that the current scorecards for an alcoholic are designed to catch those on their way, not those who are already there. If this is his way of life, watch for symptoms of change, otherwise, who the hell cares?
Besides sister-in-law, that is. Tell her if she wants to see someone skiing the expert slope to Hell, she oughta talk to me first. I’m an instructor.
Hmm. I have a fear of reading books like the Ostrich Syndrome. Do I have a problem?
::timidly raising hand::
The guys’ wife is complaining about how much he’s drinking, right? That qualifies as being a problem. Now, does that mean necessarily that alcoholism is the culprit? no, but to suggest that his drinking isn’t affecting is life isn’t quite accurate.
Don’t know if she’s complaining about : 1. he’s drinking and doesn’t help around the house 2. his drinking is adversely affecting our sex life 3. his drinking is costing us more money that we can afford 4. when he’s drinking he doesn’t pay any attention to me and I’m lonely or some other variation that I haven’t thought up yet.
So, while he may not be an alcoholic (insufficient data), there’s trouble in River City. Hopefully sister in law can come up with specific angle that’s bugging her.
I have a friend who is an alcoholic, and when he can’t afford more he will drink like the guy described here - not enough to get drunk (especially since he has a pretty high tolerance) but he HAS to have a few drinks each day or he gets sick. Many times I have run him to the bootlegger so he could get a single 22 oz. of Bud Ice to stop the sweating and shaking.
I’m not saying this means the guy in the OP is an alcoholic, just providing an example of an alcoholic who drinks lightly but regularly.
Recovered alcoholic here. First, AA does not automatically label people who drink regularly alcoholics. Some AA members who have gone a bit overboard in their zeal may do so, but remember that there is a difference between the organization and its members. The “Big Book” of AA does distinguish between true alcoholics and “heavy drinkers” who may drink to excess but are not necessarily addicted to alcohol.
I am an alcoholic because I have absolutely no control over what happens once I put alcohol into my body. I was a daily drinker but didn’t get drunk every time I drank, although I did get drunk quite regularly. Based on the limited amount of information I have, I’d say it sounds like your brother may not be an alcoholic, but there do seem to be some issues he may want to take a look at. Is he so attached to those daily drinks that he is unwilling to give them up, even though it causes problems in his marriage? Maybe it’s more a problem with the marriage than with the alcohol.
If your brother is interested in taking the AA “12 Questions” test it can be found here. It certainly is possible that he is an alcoholic, considering the amount he drinks and the frequency, but it also sounds like his drinking is not causing him problems other than the problem with his wife–but that clearly is a very real problem.
Some people have to get drunk just to function.
Being drunk does not imply being an alcoholic at all.
As the person above said, it’s what you become when you’re drunk that determines if you are alcoholic.
Also, it depends on the AA group. Here, you can have one drink & then join AA if you want. That’s what they said.