I realize that it’s only the U.S. Thanksgiving that’s this week, Canada’s being last month, and other places not having one. (Right?) So, Americans and Canadians: Anyone else that really doesn’t think Thanksgiving is a big deal?
I love Christmas, but to me Thanksgiving is just a big meal. I have to travel to see my family, which I’m doing for Christmas, so it’s not like I have a big incentive to go somewhere for Thanksgiving, since I’ll see everybody in a month anyway. Maybe I’d feel differently if I were married and had a second family I had to split the holidays with, but I don’t. I’m not a big fan of turkey or stuffing, and I loathe the entire idea of “Black Friday” – let the Christmas Shopping Orgy begin!
But when kind friends and coworkers find out I’ll be “alone” for Thanksgiving, they generously invite me over. I then have to explain that, no thanks, I’m choosing to stay home, if I wanted to partake of this particular holiday, I could drive 150 miles to my sister’s house and do so. They all look at me as if I’m very odd.
So I’ll be holed up at home, noshing on a big plate of nachos and watching football, because that’s what I WANT to do. Anyone else just think Thanksgiving is not a big deal?
I enjoy it for what it is – a day off with good eats. One year, a variety of family scheduling paths conspired that I had no where to “go” for Thanksgiving. My mother asked if I wanted to go to her friend’s but I declined and she could tell that I was fine with being home alone. Really, I was looking forward to the day off.
As it turned out, a couple co-workers caught wind of my lack of plans and invited me over. I accepted because I could tell that they wanted to ‘help’ and, hey, a free meal is a free meal. Ironically, it turned out to be one of my busiest thanksgivings since I booked myself with three co-workers.
So, no, it’s not a big deal for me but I’ve never skipped it either.
My wife is somewhat amused by the family spread for Turkey Day but that’s because her family immigrated here from Peru when she was 13 so she feels no special affinity to the Pilgrims & Indians story.
I love Thanksgiving, I think it’s the purest major holiday on the calendar. It’s not about presents, or getting drunk, or people going to war, or shouting USA! USA! USA! while blowing crap up. It wasn’t made up to improve greeting card and flower sales, and it’s not rooted in religious doctrine.
It’s about sharing a feast with the people you love. Simple, I like that.
I like Thanksgiving better than Christmas from a celebration point of view. We can just get together and eat too much and talk too loud and not worry about spending too much.
I love my family! But my situation is odd. My BIL (sister’s hubby), his whole family lives in the same town as he and my sister do (as well as my brother and his kids). So Thanksgiving is BIL’s family’s holiday and while it is extremely generous of BIL’s sister (the hostess) to invite me and my brother and his kids, especially since we’re not related to them at all, the meal is a thrash, and most of the attendees are not my family. It’s BIL’s parents (divorced), BIL’s mother’s BF and his mother, and of course BIL’s sister (the hostess), her husband, and their kids. AND my sister, BIL and their kids AND my brother and his kids.
To do the math for you, that’s 9 adults, and 6 kids under the age of 8. Christmas is the same thrash of a crew, except that my parents get thrown in to the mix as well, but my sister is the hosty for X-mas Eve (the day that “counts” for my family) and, I don’t know, it just seems like there’s more to it than porking down a huge meal. (We all go back to BIL’s sister’s for X-mas Day, which is a complete re-run of Thanksgiving, so it’s not like I won’t get to see all these people soon anyway, related to me or not.)
I realize this might sound ungrateful, but I guess I’d just rather stay home, indulging my hermit side. I don’t think I’ll be missed much in the fray.
Mostly because I believe I have so very much to be thankful for, we have work, a home, enough to eat, good health, I could go on all day.
Pilgrims and Indians aside, I truly believe the world could use more thankfulness.
For instance, if, like me, you are a woman and have had the great good fortune to be born in the ‘west’ it seems to me that event alone is worthy of a day of celebration.
Of course we love turkey too, that helps. Two Thanksgivings means we can have one with the family we were given and another with the family we chose. It’s all good for us.
Go ahead, I dare you, be twice as thankful, it’s great!
I grew up far away from most of my family. We seldom traveled for Thanksgiving, and relatives seldom visited us on Thanksgiving. Therefore, a big meal with umpteen relatives has almost never been my experience of Thanksgiving. It was never more than about a dozen people, most of them not related to me. We always had the turkey, etc., we just didn’t do so with a crowd most of the time.
And so, it doesn’t bother me that I’m fixing Thanksgiving dinner minus the turkey for one this year. (I’m fixing a chicken instead. Anticipated amount of leftovers suits me better that way.)
But, I have to admit, a community Thanksgiving service was announced in church this Sunday, and I just kind of rolled my eyes. We sang some traditional thanksgiving-y hymns in church, I’ll try to remember to say grace over my chicken, but I think I 'll skip the community service thank you very much.
Christmas soften seems so commercialized nowdays and there’s so much import placed upon it. It can be hectic, expensive, crowded, long and loud. Thanksgiving to me seemed to be kind of a kider, gentler holiday. There’s the family gathered around the game, the wonderful meal and the promise of leftovers for days to come. There’s pecan pies, mince meat and no tree to decorate or take down. It’s just seemed more relaxing and only a day long and man, I’m sooo into that.
Jodi, I feel a lot like you do about Thanksgiving. To me it isn’t a big deal.
Now, having said that, I’ll be driving my ass up to L.A. (getting caught in motherfucking traffic while we’re at it) to see some family. But I have had some solo Thanksgivings and I don’t mind it one single bit.
It used to be my favorite holiday. Just hanging out and eating turkey and watching football.
Now it’s kinda awful.
Locally, my health-conscious relatives are in charge of the food, and they make little pointless changes to make things “more healthy” which really only succeed in making things less edible.
I agreed to go to the in-laws’ this year where I thought I could at least count on decent food, but they are buying their dinner from Kroger and I’m not excited at all. Since I don’t like the in-laws, the food was the only thing giving the trip any appeal whatsoever.
I’m passing. Thanksgiving was fun when I was a kid with lots of relatives. Uncle Bob always got drunk and did something silly, grandpa would play poker with the uncles and win all their money, aunt Lola made her special orange cake. I got to hang out with older cousins, riding around after dinner, sneaking cigarettes and listening to rock 'n roll on the AM radio, and drawing names for Christmas.
It became less fun when the grandparents were gone, and even less fun when I had to do all the work.
Yep, I usually give it a pass, and I like the fact that living “out of town” means that we can skip it.
I’m a heretic because I don’t really care for turkey. I mean it’s okay, but there’s about a hundred other things I would rather eat. I know a lot of people look forward to the meal itself, but for me, personally, it’s not all that. (For some reason when I tell people this, a lot of them like to say “oh, but you haven’t tried MY turkey!” – no really, it’s the taste of the turkey itself that I’m not a fan of.)
Aside from the meal, we see the family at Christmas and it’s a huge festive production that is fantastic and also exhausting, and I need one full calendar year to recover. Eleven months wouldn’t cut it.
The best Thanksgivings I ever had were when I was in college, and couldn’t afford to travel home for both Thanksgiving and Christmas. My dad would come and visit me instead, and we would go to a bar and watch football and order every single fried appetizer food on the menu. Those were great years! I was shocked to learn that after college/grad school, I would be expected to pay for travel again. I think my dad would also secretly like to return to Bar Thanksgiving.
This year, we will be at home, and will make some noises on the phone (I suppose) when our relatives say it’s too bad we couldn’t make the trip for Thanksgiving. We will cook something that is nice but is not turkey (probably steak), and watch football and then get caught up on our Netflix. There is a very strong possibility that pajamas will be worn all day.
I don’t necessarily want to give Thanksgiving a pass, but I do wish that it were a bit less stressful. Here’s how most family holidays play out:
My mom talks about how much she’s going to cook, finalizes a menu and gets ready to cook.
She then gets incredibly stressed out because she’s bitten off more than she can chew and wants it to be an absolutely flawless, sit-down formal dinner.
My sister and I step in, cook the whole meal for her while she coyly smiles and thanks people who tell her how wonderfully she cooks while my sister either a) quietly roll our eyes or b) say, “Thank you,” prompting my mom to say, “Oh, the girls gave me a little help, too.”
But this year, no more! I’m having Thanksgiving at my house, I get to cook what I want with the exception of things mom insists MUST be there, which she can worry about herself and I’ve decreed that we’re having our food buffet-style since people will be coming and going and said toddler won’t sit still for 10 minutes, let alone an hour and a half minimum required for the type of dinner my mom wants. So I know that at the outset I’m cooking everything and I’m fine with that because I’ve planned several easy or make-ahead dishes. In fact, dessert is already made.
Also, I get to watch my toddler run around, soaking up all the attention he’ll get. He’s a lot of fun when people are over and delights in showing people his toys. Fortunately, most of our visitors really like kids.
That said, lately, I’ve been passing on Thanksgiving. My family is half way across the country and my brother and his family spend it with my SIL’s folks. I get lots of invites but I don’t want to spend my holiday with a bunch of other people’s relatives I don’t know. My new tradition is to run the local “Turkey Trot” 5 miler and then eat something extravagent I’ve prepurchased from Whole Foods. It’s nice and relaxing.