Does hair grow faster on one side of the head?

… or, Why do my sideburns never match up?

For a while now, I’ve noticed that the sideburn on the right side of my head tends to become longer than the sideburn on the left side of my head. Occasionally this is the result of a careless barber, but I’ve done my best to make sure the two are level when leaving the snip-shop. Invariably, a couple of weeks later the right sideburn is longer than the left. I don’t have muttonchops, or anything remotely approaching that level of hirsuteness; my sideburns are usually 1/4 inch or so.

Is this a common phenomenon? I know from Cecil’s earlier work that fingernails grow faster on the hand you favor (I’m right-handed, if that matters in this discussion). Does that translate to hair growth, too? Or am I a horrible freak of nature that deserves massive federal tax breaks due to my disfigurement?

Were you born on the side of a hill?

What hand do you use when you shave?

Yes. The outside.
jb,
rationalizing by saying “Somebody had to do it”

I use my right hand to shave (electric razor). As info, I get my hair cut over my ears, and the hair on the right side of my head always seems to grow over the top of my ear quicker than the hair on the left side of my head. So it’s not just a matter of me whacking the hair off my sideburn when I shave.

jb, I’m gonna have to hurt you.

I wonder what I’ll do with that massive federal tax subsidy …

From everything I’ve read the following statement is usually true (fill in the blanks)

Is my ___________ more ____________ on one side than it is on the other?

Despite what we may have heard we are only “pretty much” symmetrical.

In fact, watch for commercials that use “Our Brand” on one side and “The Leading Brand” on the other. They usually take advantage of our natural asymmetry to make themselves seem more effective.