I agree about the money. Weddings and funerals just make some people go insane.
For some people, focusing on the details of a funeral is a welcome distraction; for others, it just the first thing to fight over.
Have you considered pre-planning?
In point of fact, people with a high need for cognitive closure are the same people who need closure in the case of death. Perhaps we have a different definition of “closure”. If you define closure as the end of pain associated with the death of a close loved one (or any other traumatic event), then I agree that there is no closure for the vast majority of people and a funeral would probably serve to make the situation worse in the short term. I am defining closure as described in this Psychology Todayarticle:
Acceptance of a loss or traumatic change is critical. Not accepting the loss/change can well lead to deep psychological issues. Some people need a funeral to help them accept a death. Some don’t. I don’t feel that I need a funeral service to deal with death, but I understand that others do.
No. No children or siblings. My mother didn’t even have a funeral for my father when he died, and anyway, she will be 90 this year. I truly don’t care what happens to me after I die. Except I have arranged for friends to take care of or find homes for my animals.
This is what I object to. When you start throwing “need” into the conversation, there should be something behind that other than opinion. Some cultures don’t even have funerals.
Some people want funerals. Some people like funerals. Some people choose funerals. But if you want to assert that some people need funerals, I expect more than Psychology Today.
As for closure, it’s often used (much like the five stages of Kubler Ross) to try to browbeat the grieving into conformance with a pop psychology view of bereavement and loss. I’ll end my participation in this thread with two quotes that you (or anyone) can take or leave, from people who specialize in grief and trauma therapy:
[
](MentalHealth.com: Mental Health Information + Find a Therapist)
[
](9-11 Anniversary Reactions: An interview with Dr. Frank Ochberg - Gift From With)
I don’t want a funeral. I think they are a waste of money and put a lot of pressure on people who don’t need it at that time.
My father passed away recently, in life he was strongly against funerals. We scheduled a party at a local pub he was a regular at. It was a month and a half after he’d died. It was the type of event he would have enjoyed. Of all his friends and customers no one seemed bothered by the lack of funeral.
No, because I don’t know who will be left behind and what they’ll need/want. What I would like done with my carcass is a far, far lower priority to me than what’s going to help my loved ones get through the day. If stuffing me full of chemicals, cramming me into dressy clothes, and putting me on display before having me put into the most impervious grave possible is what whoever’s left behind needs for their own emotional well-being, that’s okay. And I think that’s exactly what most of my older relatives would need.
I didn’t have a funeral for my wife when she died. About a month later, I threw a celebration of life party, which I shared in this thread..
I put her ashes in little envelopes printed with “That’s Pam!” in a big bowl. By the end of the night, they were all gone. I have received pictures of friends and family spreading her ashes on beaches all over the world.
My executrix has instructions to help herself to my stuff, give other friends whatever they like, sell/donate the rest, and use the proceeds to buy booze for the memorial party. She may optionally inform my blood relatives, but it’s not required; they can do whatever they like. I’m much more concerned with my chosen family, and that I have done my best to provide them with decent beer from beyond the grave. 
Don’t give a flying duck. Funerals are for the living.
ETA : I half-heartedly hope some of my leftover bits will help someone somewhere, but considering what I’m doing to my body on a daily basis I haven’t taken the time to formalize things. My relatives know, though. Let *them *deal with this shit.
I don’t really care. Just as long as I’m surrounded by the bloody corpses of my enemies.
first choice for disposal of my body is donation to one of the several universities that study decaying bodies in the woods for crime scene data. In other words, leave my body to be eaten by bugs and animals.
second choice is donation to a medical school.
As for the gathering of people after to mourn me, I don’t want to plan or pay for anything. I prefer that so many people are so moved by my life and death that there is a grassroots memorial service organized which involves much praising of me and my heroism (I assume I died heroically, perhaps while saving the entire planet from a killer asteroid). I would like world leaders to gather. Also a foundation in my name. And a memorial amusement park with free ice cream.
I don’t care about anything following my death. I’m an organ donor, and they can grind up everything else and sell it to McDonald’s.
How do you define “funeral”? The only way I could interpret the statement is that the people leave the bodies where they drop and go about their daily lives. Even packing up and moving away from the bodies is a kind of funeral.
I figured you would want to be eaten by the cats.
Better that than by the bloody corpses of her enemies.
For anyone who wishes to donate their body to research, please be sure to arrange this prior to your death. Your loved ones cannot just walk up to a facility carrying your corpse, and say “Here, take this.”
As a widow myself, I know too many widows whose husband/partner wanted that, but who failed to make prior arrangements.
OK, since you brought up Kubler-Ross, here is the first stage of grief according to her book "On Death and Dying:
Some people NEED to see the body and/or have a “ceremony” to get past the initial denial phase. You can disbelieve that if you wish, but it is a fact. From the British Medical Journal, which I presume to be an acceptable cite:
Don’t want to call it closure? Fine, call it “moving past denial” or “a critical stage in grief for some” or “moving toward acceptance” or “Slartibartfast”. True, not all societies have funerals, but all have a death ritual. In no society outside of a Monty Python sketch do people drop dead and no one takes notice. Don’t want to call it a funeral? Fine, call it a “viewing” or a “wake” or a “survivor death ritual”.
You may not ‘need’ it and I may not, but to posit that no one does is simply not true.
My understanding (per Mary Roach) is you can leave your body to science, but you have no other say. They could use you to study the effects of girders being dropped on people, or for a decaying farm, or for cosmetology students to practice plastic surgery.
Maybe leaving it directly to a medical school is different.
Nah, those furry little bastards are fat enough already.
It’s a great idea regardless. I’d do it if I weren’t so darned fat - they only take BMIs under a certain level.