Sure, the Hobbits liked it (for a while).
But I figure to an Elf, lembas tastes like hard tack or a Power Bar or something.
Also, do elf farts stink to the lesser races or do they smell like flowers? I bet flowers.
Nope, tastes like Zwiebac
You are destroying some of my idols. 
I would say flowers, though.
I used to pretend that my Fig Newtons were lembas bread.
Where’s the embarrassed to be such a dork smiley?
The Rivendell Nutritional Council thanks you for your inquiry.
While most of the Elves of Rivendell love and adore Lembas, the Official Food of the Middle-Earth Elven Sports Association, a small minority of the population has moved away from the traditional Lembas-based diet. However, it should be noted that only a few expressed dissatisfaction with the taste - a flavor chosen after centuries of research by the National Lembas Corporation. Rather, some of the Eldar, having had little exercise in recent centuries, due to the paucity of conflict in Middle-Earth, have found themselves developing dwarf-like proportions in their midsections. As a solution, some of these so-afflicted have begun trying variations on their food sources, including the popular Southron Beach diet.
We hope this answers your cocnerns; we have it on good authority that the National Lembas Corporation is working feverishly on new low-carb recipes for Lembas, and expect results within a few decades. In the meantime, please accept this complimentary cookbook : 101 Best Lembas Recipes of the Third Age.
Elves do not smell like flowers. Their farts smell like flowers, though.
Around here? Anyone of them.
Wait, I’m not a dork, I’m a geek.
points and laughs at kaylasdad99
Chicken. It tastes like chicken.
Inhabitants of Middle Earth do not have sex, go to the bathroom, fart, etc. In the Silmarillion, I’m not sure they even eat.
Of interest to all pervy Elf fanciers, is Elf sex as messy as human sex? I bet Elf spooge tastes like ice cream, meaning Elf husbands get blowjobs whenever they want.
No matter how you slice it, Elves are just better at everything.
I agree, and it’s much cleaner and much less silly.
How did Sam and Rosie have all those babies, then? Asexual reproduction? And then there’s all that half-elven business. They must have sex – what’s the point of a heriditary monarchy without it?
I think Elf farts are probably silent and non-deadly. You’re not even aware that they exist.
Though Elves most certainly “git it on”, I personally am Elf-fart agnostic. Avari? Probably. Maybe some of the Teleri (excepting the Sindar). But the High Elves? Farts in Valinor? Did Fëanor occasionally let rip in his smithy while forging the Silmarils? That I seriously doubt.
As for Lembas: My guess is that Elves will tire of everything eventually, being immortal and bound to Arda. “Nothing new under the Sun”, and all that. No matter how tasty Lembas is, they’re bound to get sick of it after a few hundred thousand years or so.
Lembas is not an accustomed food to most elves. The recipe is a tightly-controlled secret, probably known only to Galadriel in the Third Age. She, in turn, would have learned the recipe from Melian the Maia, and Melian wouldn’t have learned it from anyone. The gift of lembas was a greater gift than most of the party could realize, and may have been the first time a non-elf ate it at all. So no, it was not like common hardtack.
As for the rest, Orcs are presumed to be derived from corrupted Elves, and I’m quite certain that orcs fart. So the capability is presumably present in Elvish physiology.
Don’t they have New Lo-Karb Lembas by now? With Atkins being all the rage, surely the Elves would want to get in on the action…
Nah… if their sex was that great, you’d think Elrond could have fathered children a little more often than once every 5000 years or so…
Not even a glance at CandidGamera’s beautiful post? Am I the only one without an ignore list?
As for:
Elves being immortal and all, and with the perfect physiology implied by that fact, I’d be willing to bet they produce at most 10% of the flatulence of even a Numenorean human and less than 1% of a lower human. Less still than the gluttenous dwarves who, although endowed with stout constitution, are not picky eaters. Elves who subsist on Lembas–a perfect food for a perfect creature–would experience negligible flatus which would be released imperceptibly upon defecation.
If hobbits are any measure as to the palatability of a particular food item, I might suggest that Lembas is pretty damned tasty as evidenced by Pippin’s managing to stuff 4 cakes into his greedy maw before the party pushed off from Lothlorien…which action appears to have produced flatulence in him, but then hobbits have been known to produce rectal offgassing upon demand in much the same way some humans can swallow air and belch despite not having eaten for many hours. Elves can remain, by all accounts, unperceived by the lesser races, there is no reason to believe their farts would give them away either. Probably smells like clover flower, hence Haldir’s pet name for Legolas “Yrrichal Caeriathol” which translates loosely as “Fart Blossom,” a subtle dig at Legolas’ lesser, non-Lembas eating heritage.
I don’t have the cite, but I’m pretty sure Elvish women can choose to be with child any time they like, so long as they’re gettin’ busy with their He-Elves. Now doesn’t that make you jealous? They don’t need birth control!!! Gah!
Thanks, Qadgop! Glad to see I’ve not lost my mind completely…from your cite:
I favor the former hypothesis. Elves were gorgeous and generally perfect in almost every way. How could any self-respecting Elf man resist all that fine Elfin nooky? You figure during their courtship Galadriel and Celeborn stopped an heavy petting? I think not.