Which one of you fuckers are letting your dog out at night to ruin my garden?
I’m new in the hood and in a spate of trying to have a decent garden I spent 35 bucks on rose bushes. I just noticed that three of them have been dug up by some fuckers dog. My yard is fenced and I saw the little piece of shit scurrying under it out into the street last night. I know it belongs to somebody because it has a coller on. I’ve seen it around before, just running loose. So just beware I got a package of Ex-lax mixed with some hamburger planted out back. I hope that dog shits to hig hell all over your house. And if any; of you Dopers think I am being cruel, just drop off a live trap and I will take the little fucker out in the country and drop it off.
I think the local animal control or humane society may loan you a live trap if you ask, but the thing to do would be to deliver the dog to the pound so the owner can get it rather than giving it loose bowels or possibly making it sick.
Well, more digging and the hamburger is gone. I hope to hell that somebody is scrubbing dog shit out of their carpet this morning.
I’m sure someone will come along to point out the various legal/cruelty aspects of your punishment method but before they do I will have to just sit here laughing! Classic.
Dude, good for you!
We used to have rabbits in cages in our backyard and, every other day, some mongrel would be out there barking, running around, shitting on our lawn- we called the people, we sprayed the dogs with ammonia, we called the animal control, we called the police… nothing was done!
One time my dad went outside with a 2x4, ready to go beat one of the animals :mad: We managed to stop him, but come on! If there’s a leash law, get fucking electric fences or a lunge-line thing, don’t let your stupid animals bother everyone in the community!! Why is that so fucking hard for people to understand??
As you can see, this is a particularly irritating issue for me 
I have 8 dogs buried out in the field. Their collars went to animal control so they could fine the owners.
After putting in almost 240 stitches into a very expensive ewe due to domestic dog attack, I simply started shooting them. Their owners had all been warned by the animal warden before, and fined, and I have the legal right to shoot any animal interfering with my livestock.
Cant keep fluffy in the yard? not my problem. Fluffy comes near my livestock, fluffys collar comes back to you with a summons and fine. Works for me=)
Change the type of fencing you have, if they can shinny under it, sounds like you need something that comes all the way down. if they dug under it, you can get fiberglass sheets that you drive into the ground on the inside of the fence to make a barrier. You can use a camera and get pictures of the dogs if you want to lurk, and turn them over to the animal control warden and he can penalize the owners. Most communities have some variant of a leash law requiring owners to restrrain their dogs from wandering.
All you assholes (except astro) need to grow the fuck up.
Dogs messing with your sheep? Suck it up! Be glad a dog owner didn’t come after you for killing his purebred hound, you gun-happy aencephalic.
Dogs digging up your precious pansies? Suck it up! Be happy nobody is calling the police against you for poisoning their pets, you shit-happy microparapism.
Are you named WILLASS? Shut it up!
Bah. I don’t know why I bother.
Gee, Derleth…you’d think a person could defend his fucking livelihood without being jumped on by crypto-PETArds. Dogs who attack sheep are interfering with the farmer’s income. Dogs can’t be controlled? Dogs go to the big SPCA in the sky. It’s sad, because it’s not really the dog’s fault, but it’s the owners’ responsibility to keep that dog controlled, and if they don’t, it’s the owners’ fault that the dog was killed.
People who let pets run loose don’t deserve to have pets.
Well Derleth, you might be more than happy for people to let their dogs run around unattended but I personally think that it is irresponsible and cruel to do so. What happens if a loose dog was to run in front of a car and the driver kills it, how bad do you think that person would feel? Or if a dog were to maul a small child? Or attack livestock - are you so heartless that you believe a dogs life is more worthy than a sheeps? You seem to be implying that people should be allowed to let their animals roam around free and I think that doing so makes them cruel, irresponsible idiots. I was half jesting when I laughed at cheapbastardon38thstreets response to a problem animal because I liked the idea of some stupid, irresponsible asshole getting their comeuppance but I do realise the legal and health implications as well and by no means advocate this as a standard ‘cure’ to the problem.
Derleth - one other hypothetical situation, if your neighbours pet alligator attacked your pack of purebred labradors after you had repeatly reported them for this same behaviour and you were holding a gun what would you do?
You know, OP, you could get even better results with a paintball gun. The dog would get immediate negative reinforcement so he’d know digging up your roses is wrong (he won’t make that connection with laxatives) … however you’d have a major drawback in having to sit and wait for Rover to show up.
I recommend a Tippmann A-5.
But yeah, ex lax and burgers work well too. Good for you. It’s about time homeowners started fighting back against dickweed dog owners.
I should have put in a note that I was joking about the paintball gun. While I have no problem with poisoning vermin and the like, getting shot with a Tippy hurts, a lot, and there would be better (and non-traceable) ways to take out a dog.
So you PETA nutjobs can just chill, mmkay?
I have to add a discalimer here:
I really do feel bad that the dog is the one getting the punishment in this case but the difference between paintballs (which is plain cruel) and laxatives (which is inspired) is the pain aspect. Laxatives will not harm a dog or cause it discomfort, it will simply spray shit all over its owners house, the only problem is that the owner , being such a cock monkey, will most likley beat the dog.
Kidding? Darn it, I was just about to recommend that the paint be kept in the freezer before use.
But the laxatives will do nothing (other than possibly killing the dog) to stop the unwanted behavior. The dog won’t know why it is shitting everywhere, nor will the owners.
And even supposing that the cock monkey dog owner beats the hell out of the dog for shitting everywhere, how does that stop the dog from its behaviour? He/She won’t know why the punishment is happening… nor will its owners.
Dumb. Dumb. Dumb.
I’m pretty sure my post says that that is the problem. I’m sorry if I didn’t spell it out for you. The problem with the plan is that there is a lot more to it than the owners house getting covered in shit. I was laughing at the thought of that. I realise that it is neither a solution or a viable option it just sounded funny. Happy?
No.
How do you feel that laxatives are inspired?
The dog won’t know why it is shitting everywhere. The owners won’t know why it is shitting everywhere.
The pet psychic they consult won’t know why the dog is shitting everywhere…
How is this inspired?
Oh for fucks sake. I am laughing at the idea of it and feel that I have explained over and over that I don’t think it is a good idea. Imagine it this way; If it was in a comedy show I would laugh at it if it was used in real life I would not think it was a recommended solution to the problem. Is this clear enough for you now?
Dogs know what their territory is, and this little fucker knows that my yard is not his or he would have no reason to run off when he sees me coming into the yard.
And nobody has the right to deprive me of enjoyment of my property, either by their own acts or by proxy with their animals. Animal controll won’t do any thing about it, get real. this is some lazy ass neighbor who lets their dog out to take a shit and don’t want to be bothered with keeping it under controll. I don’t care if the dog or the owner knows why the dog is shitting all over the place, just so they get fed up and get rid of the fucking dog.
Abbie the only thing I have close to an A-5 is Remington’s clone of the Browning, I think the neighbors would complain.
** Derleth** You are the one who needs to suck it up. Nobody has to make any kind of sacrifice for a dog, for any reason.
cheap bastard, why don’t you just go kick a dog and make yourself feel like a really big man, you child?
Unless, you are wooshing us, this has got to be one of the more idiotic statements I’ve read recently.
Why on God’s green earth should a farmer or rancher condone the killing of valuable livestock?
Why don’t you think that it’s responsibilty of the dog’s owner to properly control his animal?
It’s been my observation that dogs that persistently hunt stock tend to do it packs.
And once those packs go feral, the dogs can fail to differentiate between sheep and small children.
They both run and squeal.
Or does the mutt get a free pass on kids too?
I think that the OP was remiss in feeding the dog a laxitive too but your caviler attitude towards truly destructive dogs just astounds me.