Everyone, except sociopaths, are motivated to do the right thing when it comes to the serious shit. We know not to steal someones car, kick a puppy, drive 20 mph over when school’s letting out, or not to mace a random guy and cut out his kidneys to sell on the black market.
But when it comes to less dire things, some people still want to do what’s right, no matter how low risk the situation is. An example, stopping at a stoplight at 3 am when there’s hundreds of feet of visability each way. Some people would roll through that light. Others, will stop as if it were a busy intersection at 3pm, on a hill.
Sometimes not doing the “right thing” is simply more productive. What’s the matter with cheating on a geography test in high school. You’ll get a good grade and save time by not studying. Geography is mostly useless. Now, it would be much different if a med student cheated on a test on how to perform a successful surgery.
Then there’s the fun factor, many of the fun things are on the illegal and/or the unethical side. Speeding is a thrill. So are drugs and excessive use of alcohol. And who wouldn’t like to get back at an asshole who did something shady to you, by sleeping with his girlfriend?
So what motivates some people to always do what’s right* in situations where there’s little to no consequences? I know the fun factor is kind of a separate issue, but the reward, but in those situations there’s an obvious reward and that’s a rush. I’m shocked there aren’t more people who are tempted to do bad things in trade of a thrill.
It’s easier to do the right thing when it counts if you are in the habit of doing the right thing. You get to the point where you don’t have to think about doing the right thing in that situation, you just do it because it’s what you always do in that situation.
Sometimes, doing the wrong thing has cumulative consequences. You’re not likely to suffer any serious problems if you get drunk once. But if you start doing it every night, you will see some consequences. Sometimes it’s easier to never do something than to make sure you don’t do it too often.
Some people are just more risk-averse than others. For some of us who are risk-averse, the risk involved in doing some things makes them a lot less fun.
Besides the high falutin answer of “its the right thing to do so thats that” (which is my main reason) I am also secondarily motivated by the feeling that I can never get away with the smallest social infraction and also a morbid fear of what goes on my “permanent record”.
If you do the right thing, even when you don’t have to, you get to think of yourself as someone who does the right thing, or at least as someone who does not do some particular wrong thing. You can say things to yourself like, “I might not be terribly successful, but at least I don’t cheat on tests, even when nobody’s looking.” That sort of thing. It can make you feel better about yourself.
I stop because I’m paranoid about getting a ticket. I may be 100% there are no other cars or pedestrians, but for some reason I am never 100% sure a cop isn’t hiding somewhere.
It depends on several other factors as well. Are others cheating (you may have to “level the playing field”)? Can you be 100% sure I won’t be caught? Etc.
You may be disregarding the degree to which potential consequences can be a factor in the examples you’ve given. The red light and test cheating examples involve severe enough potential consequences to warrant the caution to “play it safe”. Even in cases where the potential consequences are not consciously understood, for example when a child is told to “not cheat” or “don’t do drugs”, they may still have some vague internalized fear of being caught by their parents. If not, they may just be blindly following the rules without ever really questioning them; sometimes just following the rules is so easy that the question of disobeying them never even enters the mind.
It never hurts to ward off the possibility that you’re being filmed for What Would You Do? or some other kind of hidden-camera program, and doing the wrong thing is going to lead to you being portrayed as a selfish jerk on national television.
But doing estimable acts is often hard. It’s usually easier to not do bad things, and you can still get self esteem from not doing bad things.
Or a cop might be hiding somewhere, or there might be a red-light camera, and you’ll get a ticket. Dealing with getting a ticket is a hassle, and it sucks. It sucks a lot more than waiting at a red light when nobody else is around.
Or you might not be as good at hiding your tracks as you think you are. A lot of criminals get caught this way.
Or you might not want to bother with having to hide your tracks. If you don’t cheat on your spouse, you don’t have to do anything to make sure your spouse doesn’t find evidence of your cheating, because there is no evidence to find. You don’t have to make sure your spouse doesn’t read your email, or hide the credit card or cell phone bill from your spouse.
Some of us, when we do a wrong thing, worry about other people finding out. If you don’t cheat on the test, you don’t have to worry about whether someone will find evidence that you cheated on the test. You know they won’t. That worry can outweigh any good feelings you get from not having wasted time studying for the test, if you’re prone to worry.
Well, really, self esteem comes from estimable acts that require some actual exertion on my part. Returning my shopping cart only nets me a little smug.
I think it’s about acting in line with your values. Knowing that you are doing something that is congruent with the person you are or want to become, with the side bonus being that others may appreciate this as well.
Yesterday I helped my neighbor fix her car, spent a few hours on it and refused her offer of money. Why do such a thing? I don’t even know her, because
1 she needed the help so she could go to work today
2 she needed the help and I had the tools, time and knowledge
3 she needed the help and I am in a society with her
4 she needed the help
5 Karma or “do unto others…”
6 makes the world go round and sometimes it comes full circle
Look we all can’t be perfect altruists at all times but it is the grease that keeps society turning IMHO
Because I like knowing that I’m the kind of man who will do the right thing even when nobody is watching, because it’s the right thing to do.
Because I don’t want to feel like a hypocrite when I tell my stepson to always do the right thing, even when an adult isn’t watching you. Otherwise it gives the message that it’s not about doing the right thing, it’s about not getting caught.