“Darth Vader” tries to robs pizza guy
What are the odds this ends up in News of the Weird if Jay Leno’s Headlines?
the odds are 17 to 6
Never tell me the odds!
I find your lack of toppings disturbing.
Anchovies! I should have recognised the stench when I was brought on board.
This gastronomical marvel you’ve constructed is nothing compared to the power of the Pepcid.
The approach will not be easy. You are required to get flour on your hands and stretch the dough to this size. The target area is only twelve inches. That’s a small, two-person pie, just below family size. The ingredients lead directly to the oven. A precise pizza will start a chain reaction that should get a big tip.
Only a precise pizza will get a big tip. The dough is coated with tomato sauce, so you’ll have to use mozzarella.
OK I’ll bite. (pun intended)
It was as if a millilon pizza delivery drivers cried out in terror and then were suddenly silenced.
He Shouda gone to “Pizza, The Hut” 
“These are not the pizzas you are looking for . . . move along.”
DD
“If they traced the pizzas here, they may have learned who they sold them to, and that would lead them back…home!”
I’ve got a bad feeling about this.
He ate himself… to DEATH!
The anchovies are very strong on this one. I’ll eat it myself.
These are not the pizzas we are looking for . . . move along.
The sauce will be with you…always.
You’re all clear kid! Now let’s bake this thing and go home!
That’s no moon… It’s a pepperoni pizza!
<putting up hand, as to say wait a second> I sense a disturbance in The Sauce.
[a group of Stormtroopers have found the pizza box]
Stormtrooper Officer: Something WAS in the box. The crumbs lead off in this direction.
Stormtrooper: [holding up a scrap of starchy disk] : Look sir, crusts!
“The pizza deliveryman was able to drive away, but not before the suspect pulled a stun gun from his pocket and shocked him.”
…with his beautiful complextion.