Yes, our very own Airman Doors, is off to basic on the 22nd of August, and we, being his dear, dear friends, would be remiss if we did not do our best to render him comatose beforehand, thus enabling us to semi-permanently alter his appearance, making his first days in basic oh-so-much fun!
Failing that, we’ll at least be having a heck of a sendoff party. It will be either the 18th or 19th of August. We are attmpting to come up with a suitable place (somewhere in MD, probably) but suggestions are appreciated.
So all of you MD/PA/DC/No.VA/anyone else who can make it Dopers, come on down (up?) and help initiate the soon-to-be newest member of our Air Force.
Hey sweet! I’m too far away, but you have my best wishes AB Doors. Awww… someone’s gonna be an Air Baby. Let’s hear your reporting statement.
One final piece of advice… if you smoke, do not smoke a lot before you go figuring that you won’t be smoking for a long time. <shudders as he remembers coughing up a black and bloody lung cookie while running the second day>
I certainly won’t be there. I found all of you slow and loathesome, and would not sully myself by associating further with any of you.
Oh no, wait…that was someone else.
Anyhow…about the smoking thing. They told my stepson (in the Army) that he was welcome to quit smoking, as long as he ran five extra miles every morning. He quit smoking.
And heck yeah, count me in if I can get there at all. I mean, Airman Doors is tolerable, I suppose.
Yeah, I think I can make this one… I think I’ll go and root through my cosmetics stash in search of permanant toe-nail polish. In Air Force Pink, natch.
Jeez guys… “I am gay”? “Painted Toenails”? Why don’t you just stick some soap in some socks and save him the trouble.
Just kidding AB Doors. The probably won’t do that.*
[sub]*Not to scare or anything, but a group of guys in my flight did do that to one guy they thought was gay. They’re intolerant morons tho’, and I’m sure that one day, they’ll get what they deserve.[/sub]
Jeez guys… “I am gay”? “Painted Toenails”? Why don’t you just stick some soap in some socks and save him the trouble.
Just kidding AB Doors. The probably won’t do that.*
[sub]*Not to scare or anything, but a group of guys in my flight did do that to one guy they thought was gay. They’re intolerant morons tho’, and I’m sure that one day, they’ll get what they deserve.[/sub]
Seriously though, I am so looking forward to leaving. And this promises to be an amazing going away party, so I’m up for it. I’m looking forward to seeing everyone again, and meeting some of you that I’ve never met before.
Yeah, I think I’ll be there. And anyone who wants to bum a ride is welcome to do so (as soon as I secure a car for the occasion).
I know this is going to sound odd, but could we establish a general time soon, so I can hammer it into my head (literally), have people constantly remind me, and shave whatever time it is on my head?
Shots . . . sorry, Dave, but I don’t drink. I’ll chug root beer all night with you, though:)
Maryland is a bit far away for me to make, but I’ll be rooting for you babe. I’ll be sure to send you something frilly and pink though, so you can remember me…hey, if I were to send you my watch, would you wear it? Now, if you guys wanna relocate to Massachusetts, then I might be able to make it…
Dave, I’m gonna miss you. And if you even get married while you’re gone, just save me the heartbreak, and don’t tell me
If y’all can handle a stuffy old grump, I’d like to make an appearance. Gotta tell Airman about the Dental
Floss Spider and the other dangers of bootcamp.
[sub]Can’t have him leaving in a comfortable frame of mind… Wouldn’t be traditional…[/sub]
Please, keep me posted as to when and where this will happen. I will be in and out of Castell Zappo throughout August but if I’m here when AD’s sendoff happens, I’ll be there!
I don’t think the blanket party’s a good idea, but wrapping his drunken bee-hind in a nice little number from Graves Registration and leaving him on a bus bench somewhere might be fun.
Okay, I think Sat, the 18th, would be best for this sort of get together, to allow Sunday for everyone to recuperate from whatever deviltry we come up with.
I’m thinking something along the lines of a pub crawl earlier on, then back to our starting location for further debauchery.
Weirddave has generously offered the use of his apartment, and so far that’s the leading candidate for location, (at least starting and ending), unless someone else has any other suggestions.
So far, we have Hamadryad Weirddave Jess Spritle(maybe) RTFirefly
can you come on the 18th, andygirl?
of course, the guest of honor iampunha Tranquilis Zappo
myself, and Bluesman
Anyone else? The more the merrier.
I’m too far away, but you have my best wishes AB Doors. Awww… someone’s gonna be an Air Baby. 
Let’s hear your reporting statement.