I thought it was no big deal under the right circumstances–Fat Tuesday, wet T-shirt night, etc, but I have recently talked to two females about this. One, a ~45 yo Boston UMC who said that it was aberrant behavior for a female to show her breasts to anyone she wasn’t married to. Another ~25yo said that any woman who would do that must come from a broken home and use sex to make up for a low-self esteem. I know we did the ask the stripper threads, but now I invite all females to respond.
And guys, since I know guys will read this, how would you feel if your SO flashed someone?
I don’t really have a problem with it, and I think some women do just for fun or to be part of the crowd. babygirl is shy about showing herself off, but I have had female friends who have and I haven’t lost respect for them.
I think it’s kind of a lame thing to do, and I’ve never done it.
One time I was at a fancy restaurant, at the boss’ Christmas party. It was freezing cold outside, and I had my back to the giant plate glass window. A girl, who I must assume was rather tipsy, ran up and sort of bodyslammed the window while flashing the restaurant. The mass response was “Boy, that must have been cold.” So I’m not sure what she was going for, besides frozen nipples.
Never have, but I’m still pretty young, so who knows.
To be honest, though, I can’t really imagine a situation where I’d be tempted to do so. Maybe if I were playing strip poker with a group of friends. I don’t know if that would count, though, since I wouldn’t be doing it in public. Actually, I’d probably bow out of the game before it got to that.
The impression from women I’ve got is that everyone does it once and that it’s brushed as a funny little joke that you can tell stories about and act pretend embarassed about.
I’m told it’s when someone makes a habit of it that they become the drunken slut who only gets invited to parties because she’ll lose her top before the end of the night.
Me and my oldest girlfriends (friends for ten years plus) have thought nothing of playing cards topless on a hot night with a few drinks. It’s not a sexy thing, more like having fun and being a bit more relaxed than usual.
It never happens in the Netherlands, that I’m aware of. Women are publicly naked or they are clothed, as the situation demands (nude beaches, nursing) but no flashing. It wouldn’t even be understood.
To be honest, I wouldn’t see the point. I would imagine it’s done to get a reaction (or to appear lively, sexy or fun), but I don’t think I want the kind of reaction that it would garner. This may be coloured by the fact that I’m a 34DD, and the puppies tend to get noticed regardless - I don’t need more attention!
That being said, I have no issue getting naked in a communal changing room at the gym (although that’s girls only).
I did think about entering a wet T-shirt contest at a bar once…the pot was $300 bucks and there were only about eight girls in the whole bar, so the odds were good…but I didn’t. For two reasons.
a.) I had a boyfriend, and
b.) there was a girl with big huge fake breasts that I knew would win.
Oh, and c.) It was a bar I went to regularly.
If I were in a town or a bar where I didn’t know anybody and to which I wouldn’t return, odds would’ve been way higher that I’d have done it. Just to say I did something “crazy” on vacation or whatever.
I don’t have a major problem with it, nor do I think it “says something” about the girl who does it, unless she makes a habit out of it. Sure, it’s for attention, and yeah, it’s kinda sleazy, but it’s also harmless…and if it’s the worst thing you ever do when you’re drunk and partying, you’re ahead of the game.
And now that I think about it, I have no idea what my boyfriend would say if I did it. I’ll have to ask him.
I did it once, on a bet, during the last performance of a student play I was in two years ago, in a scene where, in every performance, someone in the audience had yelled “Show us yer tits!” in response to a certain line I had. No biggie. They’re breasts. Approximately 50% of the world’s population has them; the other 50% has probably come into contact with some at least once or twice in their life.
My then-boyfriend laughed when I told him and said “Well, you get what you ask for.”
Yeah, I did it, more than half my life ago. I think I was about 20 years old.
It was 1970-something, in Colorado, at a huge keg party up in the mountains, an event that was raising money for a friend of a friend who had recently been paralyzed in an accident.
There was a wet t-shirt contest which of course turned into a take-it-off situation.
I am sure it was my then-boyfriend who talked me into it.
I was more of a peasant blouse hippie type than a raucous Look At Me woo hoo girl, but that old boyfriend was always talking me into crazy stuff.
Sure it was silly standing up there with guys hooting at me, and, then and now, I hate being the center of attention–but at the same time, the whole thing just cracked me up.
I won, probably less because of the medium-size boobs, and more because so many in the “audience” were friends, and they shouted and clapped the loudest for me.
The pot was about $125 or $150, half of which we gave back for the hurt guy.
AFAIK, nobody lost respect for me. My self respect is certainly intact.
Have your friends considered seeing someone about having those sticks removed from their asses?
I don’t recall ever flashing random strangers, but by your friend’s definition of aberrant, I’ve been aberrant all over the damned place. And if sex *isn’t * bolstering your self-esteem, you’re doing it wrong. Just sayin’.
Hmmm… does broken home count if your parents divorce AFTER you’ve moved out?
Well golly gee, sign me up to the emotionally damaged sluts club for aberrant behaviour, then, because I’ve flashed the girls on a couple of occasions.
Actually, one time it was a tit for tat (I flashed the girls, he flashed a very impressive six-pack and pecs), so does this make the guy involved an emotional-baggage-laden man-ho too? I certainly didn’t lose respect for him, nor did he lose respect for me - we’ve become good friends over the years and like to joke around about the crazy silly things we did before settling down into a respectable yuppie career path.
Your friends need to leave the judgemental statements at the door, IMO.
I’ve done it a few times, once in real public, but kept my bra on, and several times at clothing optional festivals for fun.
Scene the first:
An improv show where I was in the audience. I was not, I promise, a plant or part of the cast in any way. I didn’t even know them. It was quite a silly show, with a frequent refrain of “take off your shirt!”, to which a (male) cast member would then, unsurprisingly, take off his shirt. This little bit of silliness punctuated a number of skits, and then finally died down as it was no longer funny.
You see where this is going, right?
I was pulled up on stage for some bit or another. I don’t even remember what it was. But for about 10 minutes I was part of the show. At the end of the bit (which got the appropriate number of laughs), someone, I think it was an actor in the wings, yelled, “take off your shirt!” So I shrugged, and I took off my shirt. Brought the house down.
As for the multiple incidents at clothing-optional festivals: There’s an interesting bit of human psychology wherein anything covered becomes shocking when exposed. I think we all know that. What’s more interesting is that even when said assets have been exposed all day, after you cover them, uncovering them in the view of others becomes shocking (and funny) again. So I’d be nekkid all day (or, more commonly, topless and wearing a skirt) and then when it came time to cook or it got chilly, I’d put a shirt on. Invariably, someone would jokingly make sad noises, so I’d grin and flash them. And it was WAY funnier and shocking to see my bare breasts underneath the lifted hem of a t-shirt than it had been to see them all day in their full glory.
No. But I’m shy and prudish and modest and don’t see the point. I don’t make the assumptions that the friends described in the OP make, I just lack the inclination to show off my body.
If someone told me that she was in the habit of flashing people, I probably would conclude that we wouldn’t be likely to make good friends–it’s not that I’d think I was better than her, just that we’d be too different to relate well to each other.
I don’t know why anyone would need to make a habit of flashing people, but I also don’t really see anything wrong with it, either, unless it’s done in a situation where flashing is inappropriate. I’ve never flashed anyone; I was embarrassed the other day at work because I accidentally gave the computer guy a view of my cleavage. I’m not particularly modest or prudish; I just keep things under wraps (har!) unless there’s a reason not to do so.
Aren’t topless and flashing two different things though?
I’ve gone topless, in appropriate situations, no big deal. Flashing? Once by accident (startled roomie and his girlfriend at an ungodly hour when I took off my top after coming in the door and walked past the living room to my bedroom…) and once or twice on purpose (which was more of letting a guy get a good look down my shirt).
