Doper men... Emergency! I really, really need your help... it's time to buy my first suit.

And of course, any women who like to see their guys in nice suits (Anaamika, I’m looking at you here…), feel free to chip in.

Later this fall I’ll be attending a musical performance conducted by a friend of mine. This is a university jazz band, and will be performing in the main concert hall on campus. There is a large attendance expected. Following this performance, my friend will be hosting a sorta graduation dinner for his wife, who will be receiving her master’s degree the same week.

So. I need a suit. I’m very much a Carhartt and Levi’s type of guy. When I dress nice it’s black Dockers, hush puppies and oxford shirts. I don’t know shit about suits. My attire for this evening needs to be something above and beyond the typical ‘business’ look, but not on the level of a tux.

First of all I’m 6’3" or so and 300 lbs. I’m thinking a black or charcoal three piece. The only suit I ever wore was a three piece (rented, for my wedding), I loved the look. I don’t want to look like an old-school baron or Mr. Potter, but more like Jackie Gleason in The Hustler. I figure with a three piece I can ditch the vest if I need to wear the suit in a less formal occasion.

Now for some specifics:

  1. The jacket. How many buttons? What really is the difference (I mean in the look of two vs. three)?

  2. Tailoring. Everything I’ve found online says to buy a suit and have it tailored. How? Do you buy a suit that is deliberately large and have it fitted? How long does this usually take and what is a typical charge? Should I look for anything specific in an off-the-rack suit that will make this process easier and/or cheaper? I know I’m going to spend some bucks on this wardrobe, but I would like to at least know what I’m doing before forking over the cash.

The only place I can find within a couple hour’s drive of here is a Men’s Wearhouse. Opinions on this place differ, so I am interested in hearing yours. I don’t care if it’s a cheap suit as long as doesn’t look particularly cheap (not that I can tell the difference).

  1. How to choose a tie/shirt combo? How the hell does one judge what looks good? I’m thinking a white shirt with a very dark colored (burgundy perhaps) tie. Predictable, but hard to fuck up the look. How should I go about this? What about all one color (suit, tie, belt, shoes, pocket square) with a white or light grey shirt? I have no desire to be trendy or modern, but well dressed for a formal occasion among academics and businessmen.

  2. Accessories. I like the idea of a collar pin and nice watch. These things seem to be considered extra fancy. What’s your opinion?

  3. An overcoat. This will be in Maryland, in December, and we will be walking across campus several times, as well as a bit of DC later that evening. Would one of those large shouldered coats worn over a suit jacket be ok? (I’ve only seen these in the movies).

Any an all opinions and anecdotes welcome. I have no clue what I’m doing here.

Step one, lose the beard. It doesn’t go well with your suit.

Step two, get a suit.

Try JC Penny’s. They have a suit section.

As for overcoats - that should be fine. Top coats and trench coats go well over a suit. Make sure it is an actual overcoat.

I’ve never worn a pocket square and I’m not sure you need to.

Some say that your belt should match your shoes, but I’m not sure if that rule is enforced today.

I try to avoid getting dressed up. Clothes just don’t fit me well. But I’ve found the suit you look best in is the one you feel comfortable in. That’s hard to figure out when you’re getting your first one, so I’d suggest shop around and try on whatever you can find at local men’s stores and department stores to get some ideas. The sales guys will be disappointed if you don’t buy, but maybe you can pick up an accessory along the way if that bothers you.

I’ll leave it people who have some real sense of style to give you specific details.

Every man will need a black suit for different occasions so for your first suit, stick with black.

Styles change so look at some magazines or on-line to see something you like. Try to stay fairly conservative in the colour, style and cut if you want to use it for a while and not seem outdated.
A white shirt is another standard and goes with almost any tie, but you can mix up shirt and tie combinations for less formal events. Some stores even sell shirt and tie combos.

I remember my dad’s advice no to shiny lapels, and no double-breasted jackets.

Once you find a suit that you like, they will measure you for alterations. Basically, they adjust the waist and hem the pants and cuffs on the jacket.

First of all, if versatility is your goal, don’t get a black suit. Charcoal or dark navy blue is advisable. I would also ditch the three-piece look, which on larger men gives you a distinctive Boss Tweed look that I don’t consider particularly favorable.

  1. Either two or three buttons is okay, though two buttons is a more classic look. Larger men tend to look better in two-button suits. Regardless, for a two-button suit, button only the top button; for a three-button suit, button only the middle button. The top button of a three is optional, but I rarely see it as an asset.

  2. Buy a suit that more or less fits you off the rack, not intentionally large. With that said, the tailor can alter just about everything except the shoulders. Make sure the fit is excellent there.

  3. If you wear a white shirt, you almost can’t screw up the tie unless it’s overly garish. Match your belt and shoes, but do not, I repeat, do NOT match your pocket square with your tie. If they have a shared accent color, it’s okay, but that matched pocket square and tie look screams Macy’s boxed set. Matching your pocket square with nothing at all is perfectly fine (e.g., white shirt, blue tie, red pocket square).

  4. A watch is nice. A lapel pin looks really smarmy to me, but to each his own.

  5. Yes.

I don’t wear suits much these days, but there was a time when I had to wear a suit every day for work. So here goes. . .

Charcoal is fine. Stay away from black suits. They just look weird. Or cheap. As to your size, let the salesman worry about that. They’ll be able to fit you. Three-piece suits are very much a thing of the past – to me, men wearing them, if they’re under 70, look affected. Kind of like wearing a bow tie (come to think of it, bow ties and three-piece suits are often seen together).

Now for some specifics:

Two-button is the standard, somewhat conservative style. I think it looks better on everyone, but especially on bigger guys. Three-button suits come in two basic types. The first is the currently-in-style type. Often this is a very closely-fitted suit, and looks best on skinny hipster types. It will go out of style. The other is the old-fashioned three-button sack suit. Hard to find these days. Maybe at J. Press. I can’t think of anywhere else that might carry them. Possibly Brooks Brothers, I don’t know. That kind of three-button suit would look OK on a big guy.

You buy a suit that’s the right size. Your salesman should be able to steer you right. Then you take it to a tailor and the tailor will make it fit just right. Since everyone is going to do this, suits often come with unhemmed pants. Some stores will have in-house tailors (Men’s Wearhouse does, at least around here). There may be someone good where you live - ask around. It takes a few days, depending on what kind of backlog your tailor has. As to cost, there’s probably a lot of regional variation. Again, ask around.

Men’s Wearhouse has some decent stuff. Some cheap stuff, too. But you can get a decent suit there. Check their website to see if there’s anything you like.

You can’t go wrong with a white shirt (unless it’s a white-on-white shirt - those are beyond the pale). A white button-down (a good one) will go with anything. If you want to be more formal, a white point-collar shirt with French cuffs is the way to go. And then you get to wear cufflinks, which are pretty much the only acceptable jewelry on men (aside from a watch). Stay away from fitted shirts. They look especially bad on big guys. A dark tie with a subtle pattern is good. If you don’t want to be trendy, stay away from that monochromatic shirt and tie look. You don’t need a pocket square. Too flashy. Plain black cap-toe or wing-tip shoes are good. Belt should match the shoes, either black or brown.

My opinion is to avoid the collar pin. Flashy. Not done in the conservative world. And you can’t wear one with a button-down. A nice watch, sure.

Don’t know what you mean by a “large-shouldered” overcoat. If you’ve only seen it in the movies, probably not the way to go. A good tweed coat is fine, raglan sleeves or regular sleeves.

For the love of god, please tell me you’re joking.

My two cents…

Men’s Wearhouse has reasonably priced suits, so it’s worth a look there, but don’t trust their tailors, especially if you don’t quite have an eye in yourself to how a suit should look. No suit will fit right directly off the shelf, and MW knows this, which is why they have to have a tailor. But the tailoring will be spotty and incomplete, and they will do just enough to make the suit not look awful.

Go to a professional tailor. This can just be a small, well-reviewed (yelp.com?) storefront. You can buy something at MW that seems pretty much right for you (they’ll happily help fit you), and then just take it away. The first time I went this route, I was blown away at the different in tailoring quality. It was obvious to me that it would be better the moment they starting making precision measurements and pinning things as they went. They were actually trying to make *this *suit fit me. The MW tailors just throw a tape measure up against you in a few places and call it a day.

:smiley:

I’m that guy that likes suits. I’m comfortable in them, and I like looking professional.

  1. 3-button works better on a tall man. White shirt goes with any suit you will ever buy. Ties can show some personality, but not too much.

  2. Men’s Warehouse is fine for a first and only suit that you will just pull out for weddings and funerals.

  3. Shoes and belt should match. Don’t forget a pair of dress socks, and a white T-shirt.

  4. Suit will be altered for leg and sleeve length. There are some other alterations that might be needed. Personally, I find the suit shops to be too expensive and take too long for alterations, but I have options where I live. YMMV. Do not open the outside pockets on the jacket (they are stitched closed by default). If you have a Costanza wallet, leave it in your car glovebox. It won’t look good in NY pocket.

  5. I have the nice watch. I mix in French cuffed shirts about 50% of the time. I can’t remember seeing a collar pin in years, but it is possible I just haven’t been paying attention.

  6. I’ve got a 15 year old London Fog raincoat that I got at Burlington Coat Factory for a steal. Its a classic, and still looks barely worn. It has a removable lining and is belted.

Someone related to me their father’s theory that you can’t wear a tie if you have a beard, so you can’t wear a formal suit if you have a beard. The reason is that ties and beards are both neck decorations and you can only wear one of those.

Not my idea, don’t ask me to explain it.

I’m way out of date for DC, but if dark clothes suit the OP (offered only as an alternative choice)…same shirt, same tie, darkest blue pinstripe they carry & a London Fog raincoat. Take out the lining of the raincoat; the suit will keep you warm.

Look, you have to have something to judge against what you really want when you stand by the 3-mirrors, right? Don’t forget to have a pair of black socks & your suit-shoes with you when you try things on.

PS- if you Really like the tie, buy several at once. Because stains happen & you will never find that exact style of tie anywhere ever again.

The charcoal suit is very versatile. Appropriate for weddings, funerals, and everything in between, without looking like an undertaker. Charcoal plus pinstripes is an excellent choice if you’ve got a gut.

Don’t listen to the above about the three-piece. Three-piece suits are awesome. A suit is not a uniform; you want to wear what makes you look good and is comfortable. There’s no reason to avoid a three-piece just because they’re not especially popular right now. A properly tailored three-piece looks fantastic on anyone. You can always omit the vest if you don’t feel like it that day. I say more options = better. And if you’re getting a tailored suit anyway, the vest is not that much more expensive.

For a larger gentleman I would recommend investigating the possibility of suspenders instead of a belt. If you decide on suspenders, get the proper kind that hook onto buttons on your pants (not with alligator clips.) Tell the tailor that you want suspender buttons and he’ll sew them on for you.

I think pocket squares a pretty pointless, honestly. I’d leave the pocket bare. Invest in a really good silk tie instead. (Stripes, not paisley. Jesus hates paisley.) No bow-ties. You’re not Bill Nye.

And since you’re going to an evening performance and dinner you need to wear black lace up dress shoes. Your dress socks match your suit pants, so charcoal, not black to match the shoes. If possible buy a pair of nice dress shoes with a leather sole, not a giant rubber sneaker sole with a dressy upper.

(1) Two buttons or three buttons are both fine, but if you’re getting one suit, I’d lean towards two. Three button suits can make you look slimmer, but two buttons are more the norm. They’re both fine, try a couple on and see what they’ve got and looks better on you. Any color is fine, so long as it’s black, dark navy, or charcoal grey.

(2) Tailoring isn’t nearly as hard as it looks. You try a decent off the rack suit on, it almost kinda sorta fits, you get it tailored so that it does.

(3) Shirt and tie isn’t terribly difficult either, just get a decent white or blue shirt in your size, get it pressed and wear it over a white t-shirt with a decent slik tie. I’ve never needed to get a shirt tailored, but many say that’s the way to go.

(4) Acessories: your call, just keep it subtle and don’t go overboard.

(5) Overcoats are fine and sometimes necessary, just make sure that the overcoat fits very well, is very good quality and isn’t too constricting or too overwhelming. If you’re going to spend on the suit, don’t skimp on the overcoat.

Don’t overthink it. If it feels good, fits good and looks good, it is good. Don’t think of it as a chore, have fun.

Disagree. A non-negligible portion of the professional world does not consider a black suit appropriate daytime attire if you are not Johhny Cash, a member of the clergy or on your way to, currently attending or having just attended a funeral. A black suit is appropriate evening attire for less than formal events, but for daytime events, a black suit is less universal than many people realize.

If you’re only going to own one suit (and I’m not throwing stones here, I don’t even own a suit that I could still fit into) charcoal gray is the standard. You can wear it to a funeral without anyone thinking less of you for not wearing black more often than you can wear a black suit suit to a non-funeral daytime event without anyone thinking less of you for it.

I think pretty highly of Men’s Wearhouse, for what they offer. That is, reasonble quality, reasonable price. They’re very successful because they fill a role that’s very common these days. “I just need a suit that doesn’t look like a cheap piece of shit to wear on rare occasions.” The sales people are decent, in my experience, and can help you with shirt/tie combos as well, but this boils down to personal taste. It’s not Brooks Brothers, but they won’t let you leave their shop looking like a clown, either. They do in-house alterations, or you can find tailors pretty easily with google search for your city.

Two or three button is also a matter of personal taste. Try out both. Ask your sales guy which he thinks looks better and why. Then make up your own mind based on what you like. I would avoid a three piece. Few people can rock a three piece suit and look good these days. I wouldn’t bet against the odds on this.

Accessories are another highly subjective decision. Nobody can fault you for wearing a reasonably dressy watch. If you want to go for a shirt with french cuffs (which is a bit flashy, but less risky than a three piece suit, IMO) cuff links are a nice way to accessorize. I’m not a fan of tie accessories. I don’t like tie-bars, tie-tacks or any of it. My thought is: learn how to tie a tie and you won’t need hardware. I admit to being kind of a dick about this.

An overcoat in December (in MD) is pretty much mandatory. You’ll look very akward without it, even if you’re not actually cold. Unfortunately, this will be another significant expense. If money is tight, this is something you may be able to find of decent quality and little wear at a secondhand store to save yourself some coin. If you go this route, take a woman with you for her opinion, if possible. Have it dry cleaned after purchase.

Your beard is fine. Color-wise, navy blue is never a bad idea, but I would go with a medium gray. Not as dark as what I normally think of as charcoal and not light by any means. My guess is I’m thinking lighter than you’re thinking.

Two buttons means the buttons can start lower, which means there’s a longer line running vertically down your middle, which is a good look. A good general rule is to avoid having large swaths of uninterrupted material anywhere. The wrong three button suit will run afoul of that rule, especially if it’s too big for you, which is up next. I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with a three-piece - done well I think it looks really good, plus going with the vest and no jacket is badass, and it actually became so popularly lame that now the cool people say it’s cool - but it’s super hard to do well, and infinitely more so if you’re a big guy. I would avoid it. I do avoid it, actually, and I don’t have a gut. It’s like a double-breasted suit - you see somebody else wearing one and you think holy shit, that is the way to do it, but then you try it and you realize the math is more complicated than it seems.

Well, you get measured, first of all. Then you try on a jacket and see how you like it, and you go from there. At most dedicated suit places, you can get it all done in one shot. I recommend, since you’re just getting the one suit, that you don’t settle. Spend the extra hundred bucks and find one that fits you the way you want it to and looks the way you want it to. If I were dressing you, that would mean: narrower, shorter sleeves and legs, so you can see a bit of shirtsleeve and the pants just barely hit the tops of your shoes, and there’s nothing hanging off anywhere, and a jacket with broad shoulders that comes in at the waist and doesn’t fall down over your crotch.

My guess is that I’m thinking much more fitted and much shorter all over than you’re thinking. Admittedly, I just went and found something that agreed with my opinions, but take a look at slides 8 and 9 here. I think it’s really obvious which looks better. Skinny guys should wear closely fitted stuff because it looks better, but that doesn’t mean bigger guys should wear bigger stuff; it still looks bad.

I would say, ideally, that it’s worth it not to get a cheap suit if you have any flexibility; get one suit that’s exactly right and be done with it. You could try one of those discount places like a Nordstrom Rack or whatever and spend a little more and get something that looks a lot better, fits better and is better-made, and I think it’s worth it.

Just wear a white shirt. The fashionable formal thing to do is have everything slim these days - slim lapels, slim tie, slim suit - but if you aren’t worried about trendy then a fairly bold tie in a traditional color with a white shirt is the way to go. Gray suit, white shirt, burgundy tie would be great. All one color, I don’t think you’ve thought through all the way. Don’t do that. Black shoes/black belt is safest, but I think medium brown or red-brown shoes with a gray suit is awesome and not too flashy. Plus you can wear sweeter socks.

Also, do get a fitted shirt, which means one that fits, of course. I’m not a fashionable person at all, really, but frankly it does look kind of absurd to have bags of extra material hanging over your belt, and my experience has been that classic-fit shirts do. I guess it depends on your proportions, but unless I have a giant neck and a tiny waist, I think you should at least see which cuts closer to your actual shape.

I don’t think a nice watch is extra fancy. An extra fancy watch is extra fancy, but a watch is more or less expected. Pins, eh; whatever you feel good about. I think you want to have a tiny bit of flash somewhere. Also your shoes should be formidable. They should have laces and a bit of heft to them.

I also don’t know what large shouldered means, but if your goal is to do the done thing, you just want a wool topcoat of some variety. People do some crazy shit winter-coat-wise, though; vests and scarves under the suit and that sort of thing, so if you’ve got another idea you might as well let it fly. If you dress yourself willy-nilly you look like an idiot, but if you follow almost all the rules and flagrantly abuse one or two, who’s to say you aren’t just on the bleeding edge?

I needed a suit for the first time ever earlier this year, so I popped into a menswear store and told them I needed a suit and hadn’t bought one before. After half an hour of trying stuff and talking to the salesman, I had a new suit that looks excellent for a decent price. (Concur with everyone else, charcoal gray is just fine for a multi-purpose suit.)

The salesmen want you to be happy, and they like showing off their knowledge. Let 'em.

I’ve had some…interesting experiences with Men’s Wearhouse.

One time I bought a new suit there and they said the alterations would be done next Tuesday. So on Tuesday I went to pick it up. They made me wait for a while because obviously they hadn’t finished it and were frantically stuffing it into a garment bag. So finally I got the suit and took it home. I took it out to wear to a function that very evening. I put on the pants and shirt and tie and the jacket and was pleased to see that everything fit perfectly. I go to button the jacket and…WTF? No buttons. Yes, they had neglected to sew the buttons on the jacket. I never even realized that they unsew them when doing alterations. But there I was, in a perfectly-fitting suit, buttonless. My other suit was at the drycleaners, so I had nothing else to wear. Nobody really noticed, except one drunk lady who complimented my “daring fashion choice.” :cool:

Anyway, they fixed it for free, of course, but jeez.

Another time, they were doing a buy a suit, get an extra pair of pants 50% off sale. Sounds good. So I buy the suit and pick out the extra pants. I pay for it and hand them over for alterations, then go meet someone for dinner. Halfway through dinner I get a frantic call on my cell phone, “Hey, it’s Dwayne from Men’s Wearhouse…uhhh, I just realized I forgot to charge you for the extra pair of pants. I need you to come back right away so I can charge your credit card again!”

Okay. I mean, I didn’t want this poor sap to be stuck paying for my pants, but the tailor still has the damn things in the back. You couldn’t just fix it when I come in to pick them up? But whatever, I went back there and paid for the pants (50% off, you bet your ass I checked.)

Anyway, I don’t go to Men’s Wearhouse anymore.