I just read Cecil’s postscript to this week’s column, aka BirdDog21’s incoherent rant.
Do folks like this know how illiterate they are? If so, why do they attempt to communicate via the written word?
I appreciate Cecil’s holding this guy up to the ridicule of the Teeming Millions. God knows I’ve tried to do it in the past, with not much success. And it does tell us that, yes, UncaCees does plow through even the most indecipherable letters and e-mails.
Please tell me this guy isn’t a registered user on the SDMB!
Homepage: http://www.bigfuckinboatwithbadassplanes.mil
Occupation: Swabbie Pounder, First Class
Location: Anywhere you feckless landlubbers ain’t.
Interests: Navy Chow, Port of Call, The Head, Air Superiority
ICQ Number: CVN69 – An UncleBeer Profile
“Avast and ahoy, landlubbers! Shore leave’s in August. Hide your women.” – A WallySig
I don’t mind the incoherent writers, but what’s terrible is the number of people that forget to put in a link to Cecil’s column. See the question at the end of the 31 March 2000 straight dope column.
I’d almost say that one was the product of an “artificial stupidity”. That sort of thing is called “flight of ideas”, symptomatic of mania, and can be convincingly machine simulated. However, I think this one is somebody who just ran out of lithium, or who is having an obscure joke on us.
Is that gibberish before or after being put through babelfish a half dozen times?
Your Official Cat Goddess since 10/20/99.
I just washed my cat. It’ll take me hours to get the hairs off my tongue.
                                        --100% certified genuine WallyM7™ sig
Gee, I don’t know what you guys are complaining about. He makes perfect sense to me. I have taken the liberty of translating his remarks into something perhaps a bit more comprehensible by mere Earthlings. http://www.straightdope.com/columns/000331.html
Here are his original remarks:
first of x-files and the video game are just another thing to incourage sceptics and futher more talking to any1 about it and the abduction theories they don’t care and it gets me a lil’ pissed off i’ve treid streiber and another and they don’t return anything by looks the government has sold our souls to the greys and i think any concerned people about this area 51 crap is nothing compared to what evidence there is in the past are possesions of these inteligent intergalctic beings after all we where created by them why do u think that after all this time there still isn’t peace in the world plus there are so many religons although we have changed hands many times --BIRDDOG21
Here, Earthlings, is the translation, with a few amplifying remarks:
First off, “The X-files” and the video game based on it are just another thing to encourage sceptics. If we can make the idea of alien occupation of Planet Earth into a joke or a game, people won’t take the idea seriously. Furthermore, it’s no use talking to anyone about “The X-Files” and the abduction theories. The people I talk to about it don’t care, and it gets me a little pissed off. I’ve tried to talk to Whitley Streiber and a couple others, and they don’t return any of my phone calls.
It looks to me as though the government has sold our souls to the Greys.
I think that any concern people may have about this Area 51 crap is nothing compared to what evidence there is of alien occupation of Planet Earth in the past. You are all wasting your time chasing around after flying saucers out in Roswell, when there are much bigger and more important aliens present.
We are the possessions of these intelligent intergalactic beings, after all. We were created by them.
Why do you think that after all this time there still isn’t peace in the world, plus there are so many religions? It is because we here on Planet Earth have changed hands many times. We have been owned by many different intergalactic beings. --BIRDDOG21
No need to thank me; I will be amply rewarded when the Mother Ship arrives.
:::sarcasm enabled::: :rolleyes:
“Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast!” - the White Queen
Damn, Not da Mom! Can I send you some of the reports that cross my desk each day? 'Twould make my life so much easier not having to guess what people mean.
Homepage: http://www.bigfuckinboatwithbadassplanes.mil
Occupation: Swabbie Pounder, First Class
Location: Anywhere you feckless landlubbers ain’t.
Interests: Navy Chow, Port of Call, The Head, Air Superiority
ICQ Number: CVN69 – An UncleBeer Profile
“Avast and ahoy, landlubbers! Shore leave’s in August. Hide your women.” – A WallySig
So, when I’m walking down the mean streets of the city and the sidewalk homesteaders are announcing what seems like incomprehensible babblings to me, what are they really saying?
Record it, drop it onto disc, create a wave file, forward it to Notthemama, he’ll translate, send it back, you return to the steam grate, read to the babbler, record his response.
Repeat as necessary.
Homepage: http://www.bigfuckinboatwithbadassplanes.mil
Occupation: Swabbie Pounder, First Class
Location: Anywhere you feckless landlubbers ain’t.
Interests: Navy Chow, Port of Call, The Head, Air Superiority
ICQ Number: CVN69 – An UncleBeer Profile
“Avast and ahoy, landlubbers! Shore leave’s in August. Hide your women.” – A WallySig
There was an article in the New York Times a month or two ago that I feel explained a lot about life (sorry, I don’t know if it’s available on line). A group of psychologists were studying intelligence and found that the skills that were necessary to be intelligent were the same skills that were necessary to judge intelligence. In other words, clueless people don’t know they’re clueless because they’re clueless. A person of average or above-average intelligence will have a generally good awareness of how intelligent he or she is. But a person of below-average intelligence will be unable to recognize the evidence indicating that their intelligence is below average.
Notthemama: Such precision! I hope the Mothership lands soon to take all the well-honed bloodhounds like Birddog on to happier hunting grounds. The Truth is waaaayyyy out there…
Thanks, NTM! I had actually (for a moment there, probably when away from the computer) thought of similarly translating that run-on sentence for the … slow :D–I mean, those poor at deciphering–but then I forgot. Glad to see you did it.
Y’know, I can understand that stuff (of course, I think in stream myself) but in great heaps it just loses me: Finnegans Wake, technical manuals, etc.
Yes, I am an egomaniac; why do you ask?
…You didn’t ask?
Ah, but I knew you were dying to!
…You weren’t?
Aw, shucks, it twarn’t nuthin… ::: scuffing ground shyly :::
Actually, I can’t read Joyce, either. I get about one page into Ulysses, to the part where the guy is walking up the steps of the martello tower, carrying the tray, and then I have to close the book quietly and go outside to play for a while.
And I can’t really take any credit for any particular skill at translating things. It’s just good genes; my great-great-grandfather was Vulcan, so…
“Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast!” - the White Queen
Unue, “La X-Dosieroj” kaj la komputila ludo bazita sur ghi estas nur alia afero por sproni skeptikuloj. Se ni povas fari ludon au shercon el la ideo de eksterterula konkero de la planedo Tero, homoj ne taksos la ideon serioza. Plie, ne utilas paroli al iu ajn pri “La X-Dosieroj” kaj la homshtelaj teorioj. La homoj al kiuj mi parolis pri ghi ne taksis ghin grava, kaj ghi iom ghenas min. Mi provis paroli al Whitley Streiber kaj kelkaj aliaj, sed ili ne respondas al miaj telefonvokoj.
Shajnas al mi kiel la registaro vendis niajn animojn al la Grizuloj.
Mi kredas ke iu ajn zorgo kiujn homoj havas pri chi tiu bovfeko pri Areo 51 estas nenio komparate al la pruvoj kiuj ekzistas pri eksterterula posedo de la planedo Tero en la pasinteco. Vi chiuj malshparas vian tempon chasante flugtelerojn che Roswell, kiam estas multe pli grandaj kaj pli gravaj eksterteruloj chi tie.
Ni estas la posedajhoj de chi tiuj inteligentaj intergalaksiaj estuloj, fakte. Nin kreis ili.
Kial, lau vi, chi tiom malfrue ankorau ne estas paco en la mondo, kaj estas tiom da religioj? Estas char ni anoj de la planedo Tero shanghis je proprietuloj plurfoje. Ni estis proprietitaj de multaj malsamaj intergalaksiaj estuloj. - BIRDHUNDO21
