"Dude, Where's My Car?" Is Oscar-Worthy Compared To This...

This…festering pile of crap that is soon to be inflicted upon us all. Don’t get me wrong - I loved the cartoon when I was a kid. But…really. This can’t be good. In any way.

When I pointed on the link, I thought the movie recap you were linking to was called “Fatal Bert.” Though a homicidal Sesame Street puppet movie would have probably been preferable.

And who are the guys in yellow in the back of this picture? Is this Fat Albert and Kid and Play or something?

Oh, dear lord, no. Are screenwriters really so lazy/uninspired/completely desperate that they’ve sunk to the point where anything on TV that people remotely liked is now fodder for the big screen?

Not with Kenan Thompson in it.

If they used some of Cosby’s old Fat Albert stories for the screenplay, then it has potential.

I hope the Frankenstein story is in there.

I’d blame the studios, not the writers, but I don’t think there’s much room for doubt left. I’m eagerly awaiting a Heathcliff movie. :smack:

This is going to be a big Fat Abortion.

Read the summary on the page I linked to…there’s no potential for anything but ruined careers of anyone associated with this turkey.

Inflicted on “us all”? Like hell it will! Unless 20th Century Fox takes a page from A Clockwork Orange, it ain’t gonna be inflicted on me.

Cat shit may be nasty, but if you pick it up and eat it, don’t go complaining about the cats.


I’m pretty sure we’ll be subjected to a marketing blitz that will be impossible to ignore…product tie-ins, TV and radio ads, toys, tee-shirts…it’s gonna be everywhere.

Wow, I’m glad to see that I wasn’t the only person that read it that way. Man, I was already anticipating a sequel where Ernie sets out to seek retribution for the cops, lawyers and judges that sent Bert away for 25 to life.

Hollywood execs have been trying to get a Fat Albert movie off the ground since at least Cosby’s last TV series. Cosby has a credit as both writer and producer so there’s a chance that it’ll do better than 18%.

Exactly, vote with your wallet.

Fair point. Sorry about my, um, vehemence there; I think my lunchtime coffee was brewed extra-strong.


Nah, 99.9% of the time you’re exactly right - “you don’t like it, don’t watch it/change channels/turn it off” is my credo, too. Unfortunately, the Hollywood marketing machine being what it is, I fully expect to be bombarded with ads and tie-ins from all directions until Fat Albert mercifully dies at the theaters.

Any bets on how long the build-up period lasts? I’m thinking 6 weeks of hype, then the permiere, maybe a week on the screen, then relative peace again.

What about Paul Anderson (the hack)? Is he involved? Will Fat Albert and the gang be fighting the cast of Good Times?

Dear Lord, this is a bad, bad sign. Just when you think Hollywood can’t do anything to make them seem even more idiotic and out of touch…

I mean, when was the last time Fat Albert even aired? Do they think the people who remember the show will have any inkling whatsoever to go see this, or take their kids to see it?

And I’m sorry, but Mushmouth just doesn’t work in real life. It was funny for that one Saturday Night Live sketch a few years back, but outside of that…what’s the point? Overexageration works in cartoons, not reality.

That idea of Fatal Bert though…I’d pay to see that.

I’m only going to go see this if I amba guaranteed toba seeba Mushmouth putba capba inba sombadies assba.

I think I have it easier than most. I’m online a lot, but not on any sites that advertise shitty movies. I watch the boob tube an average of an hour or so a day, but it’s almost exclusively DVDs; we just canceled our cable, and I won’t miss it at all. I see about one movie a month (maybe a little more), and kind of enjoy gaping in horror at the previews.

So my exposure to their advertising campaign will possibly consist of one appallingly bad preview, which I’ll get to make cutting comments about to my wife, and then it’ll be over.


TV Tome says 1984. Cosby started discussing a movie deal about 10 years after that.

Man, can’t they get a real-life large Black person play Albert? They couldn’t find a high school offensive tackle or something?