Dude, where's my left nut?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Yesterday, I went for a bike ride. For starters, it was 32 out.

For seconds, it was windy, so I had to get low on the saddle.

For thirds, I was wearing tight biking shorts.

I got home, jumped in the shower, and started washing my balls. Ummmm, check that. I started washing my BALL. My left nut was nowhere to be found. :confused:

There was the right nut, filling his rightful space in the ball-sack. But, on the left, just a wrinkly skin-bag. :eek:

Dude, where’s my nut?

I started pushing around and god bless the little guy if he hadn’t curled up inside for a warm winter nap, right next to my wang. I’m sure he woulda come back on his own when things warmed up but I gave him a little push to get him started.

I guess there’s some extra room down there I didn’t even know I had. I just wish he woulda told me he was taking off for a while.

2

thanks for the heads up! I’m going out today since we’re gonna be 36 or so! But I’m sure as hell gonna wear more than shorts. I’ll put a geolocator on my right one, that’s usually the one that disappears on me.

3

Ahhh! You guys’ stuff disappears when it gets cold!?!?!? :eek: :eek: :eek:

Glad I’m a gurl. :slight_smile:

4

Dude, it comes back. Well, sometimes.

5

When come back, bring nut…

6

So, Trunk, is everything where it should be yet?

7

That’s why my final argument to any advocate of the “Intelligent Design” theory is dropping my pants. :smiley:

8

Big smile laughy fun-fun laugh.
Dude, one of my nuts often retreats into the body for unknown reasons. I haven’t found a reason yet to worry about it.

9

TMI

The weirdest thing I’ve ever seen was when my husband (of normal endowment) demonstrated how he could make his flaccid penis disappear “into” himself.

Then there’s the way the relaxed testicles make constant tiny adjustments: the skin is tensing, relaxing, and moving all the time. It’s…alive!

You guys have fascinating apparatus.

10

Isn’t it odd/cool/fascinating how, even though our bodies are basically ‘us’. We still have to learn their idiosyncrasies as if they are somehow completely separate from that which defines us as ‘me’.

11

<elaine benes>
I don’t know how you guys walk around with those things.
</elaine benes>

12

I believe this has been referred to as ‘the poor man’s lava lamp’ on this very board.

13

If it’s wrong to be interested in this kind of stuff, I don’t want to be right.

14

Like a frightened turtle!

15

[George Costanza] Do women know about “shrink?” [/GC]

16

Just sitting here, waiting for the other nut to drop.

:smiley:

In other news: ** Stiff Nipples & the Retractable Nuts** would be an excellent name for a band!

17

Actually, it was Billy Connolly who first mentioned it in one of his stand up routines.

18

It retracted into your body cavity because it didn’t like the cold. If it does not re-emerge within 48 hours, please call your doctor. Sometimes they have to, uh, go fish 'em back out. :eek:

19

faints
I’m so glad I’m a woman. I’m so glad I’m a woman. I’m so glad I’m a woman.

20

Right, because bloody coochie every month is so much less dramatic than the occasional disappearing testicle…

i kid!