A high speed car chase in Hazzard county yesterday has left three young people dead after their car overturned in thick bush land during the pursuit which lasted only five minutes.
The three young people two male and one female, all in their early twenties, were well known to local authorities and to the small time criminal world of the area.
Witnesses have confirmed that they were popular youths in and out of trouble all the time with the law and their easily identified sedan was often seen around the streets of Hazzard.
Their names have yet to be released.
The pursuit began in the town centre of Hazzard when Sheriff Roscoe said he wanted to speak to the youths in which one of the males had a warrant out for his arrest but 'they took off" before he could say “Boo”.
The incident surrounding the deaths will be referred to the District Coroner to investigate whether the Sheriff’s department were at fault and whether the police could have done any thing to prevent the deaths.
However, the Mayor of Hazzard, Boss Hogg, confirmed yesterday that he would support his Sheriff as the youths were “known trouble-makers always spoiling someone’s fun”.
He concluded that it was regrettable that the tragedy occurred but warned other would be offenders that “the law is the law in Hazzard County”.
My brains full of short versions. Me and my brother make them up all the time…it started with Rambo when he’s hitching into town, sheriff pulls up along side says “hop in …we don’t like people like you in our town blah, blah, blah” …drops him on the other side of town, Rambo replies “uh uh really donn blame ya, bye” and he keeps walking. Easy. The End.
“In 1972 a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn’t commit. These men promptly failed to escape from a maximum security stockade where they served out their sentences.”
Dr. Bruce Banner is exposed to massive amounts of gamma radiation in a freak laboratory accident. Nine days later, despite heroic efforts (including repeated blood transfusions) he dies of acute radiation poisoning.
Honolulu (AP) - Six people owe their lives to the watchful eye of a young apprentice sailor employed by an island tour boat captain Jonas Grumby. Instead of trusting a faulty weather report, the first mate observed indications in the sky that a large storm was approaching. Capt Grumby concurred, and cancelled the 3-hour tour he was conducting for his 5 passengers.
Los Angeles (AP) - National Register reporter John ‘Jack’ McGee has been arrested in connection with a fire that claimed the life of noted genetisist Dr. Elaina Marks. McGee allegedly broke into the private research facility that Dr. Marks and her associate, Dr. David Banner, were working in late last night. While hiding, he caused a container of volitile liquid to spill into other dry chemicals in a store room, starting a massive fire. Dr. Banner survived the fire somehow. When asked about his feelings about McGee’s transgressions, Banner replied, ‘It won’t do any good to get angry.’
Project Tic-Toc is a top secret U.S. government effort to build an experimental time machine known as “The Time Tunnel”. The base for Project Tic-Toc was huge and located underground in the Arizona desert, Two key Time Tunnel scientists, young physicist Dr. Anthony Newman and Dr. Douglas Phillips regarded the massive tunnel complex.
“Are you high? We wouldn’t set foot in that thing for all the tea in China!”
Come and listen to a story ‘bout a man named Jed,
A poor mountaineer, barely kept his family fed.
And then one day he was shootin’ at some food,
And bagged a big fat possum for dinner.
Sherman Oaks, CA (AP) - A widowed mother of three girls has had her second marriage annulled after its disasterous wedding reception. Her new stepsons’ dog chased her daughters’ cat through the refreshments, causing much mayhem. Carol Martin, refusing to take her new husband’s name since she plans to leave, said, ‘I don’t know what I was thinking. I can raise my three girls fine. But Mike’s (the groom’s) boys are uncontrollable brats!’
San Francisco (FNS) - The USS Enterprise - barely one year out of refit and reassignment to a 5-year deep space mission - has had tragedy strike, reports Commodore Wesley of the USS Yorktown. The entire crew except for one has died of a mysterious ailment that has left their bodies devoid of sodium chloride. The ship was found in a stable orbit of planet M-113, home of a once vast pre-space empire, but now only home to their ruins. The surviving crew member, Crewman Green, is slightly catatonic and nervously bites the knuckle of his right index finger, reports the Yorktown’s CMO. Even though Green appears to be immune to the M-113 disease, as yet not isolated, it has also taken the lives of two of the Yorktown medical staffers. Green has been put into quarantine until the pathogen can be isolated.
Los Angeles (Network 23) - Star investigative reporter Edison Carter was tragically killed in a motorcycle accident in the garage of his employers’ headquarters. Carter, driving the motorcycle without a helmet, hit a security barrier at 45 mph and was thrown headfirst into a warning gate.
Boulder, CO (The Denver Post) - A young Boulder woman had a run-in with a man who she thought was a priest. She found him walking along a rural road, dressed in what she thought was a priest’s cassock. After giving him a ride to her home on Pine St., she discovered he was simply wearing a business suit with the shirt and jacket on backwards. Immediately fleeing, she ran to a local store where she called both the police and her father, a local music store owner. The stranger whom she thought was a priest was apprehended and taken to a psychiatric hospital in Denver. He doesn’t appear to be violent. Although he can speak and understand English, he talks half the time in a unintelligible language. He will be held at the hospital until his fitness to face charges on impersonating a clergyman, although if he had any untoward purposes is unknown.
New York, NY (New York Times) - A portrait photographer has been arrested in the simple assault of his roommate, a noted sports columnist. The photographer was quoted as saying that he couldn’t take his friend’s slobbish behavior. He then broke into an anxiety-induced asthma attack. Asked if he could reconsile with the photographer, the columnist exclaimed, ‘Are you kidding!? He’s psychotic! He makes everyone at my poker games use coasters, and constantly sprays air freshener when I smoke my cigars. And after I took him in after his wife threw him out. I guess I felt sorry for him, since my wife did the same.’
