Dumbest/Most Ineffective Ads

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
81

I actually like those Sonic commercials. I’ve decided that the :smack: sound at the end when they plaster the name of whatever food they’re shilling is the sound of the insultee backhanding the insulter. Makes them much more tolerable.

Which sleep aid is it that runs those “Your dreams miss you” ads with the beaver and Abraham Lincoln? That one came on when I was watching TV with a friend who had horrible sleeping problems. He spent the entire commercial yelling obscenities at the screen. I do not think that was an effective ad.

82

[QUOTE=SpazCat]
I actually like those Sonic commercials. I’ve decided that the :smack: sound at the end when they plaster the name of whatever food they’re shilling is the sound of the insultee backhanding the insulter. Makes them much more tolerable.

[/QUOTE]

Yeah, I think they are funny, too. There is one right now where it is two girls and one is talking about how when she was younger and would get depressed, she’d eat like, a whole bowl of cookie dough after a bad date. But then she says she’s grown up and changed. Her friend asks if now she eats like, half a bowl of cookie dough. The girl goes, 'Oh yeah, a half, sometimes two halves." Her friend looks at her and says, “Yeah, that’s a whole bowl of cookie dough.” The girl pauses for a second and goes, “Oh. . . yeah.”

Cracks me up every time.

83

[QUOTE=LurkMeister]
Thanks for fighting my ignorance, butler1850. My only exposure to NASCAR when I was living in Chicago was the occasionally references made on the local country station by several of the DJ’s. When I started visiting a friend in the Raleigh/Durham area (which eventually led to my deciding to move down here) I was warned about the local college sports rivalries but the presence of NASCAR managed to elude me. The occasional culture stock still hits, like when we had the big snowstorm last January (almost a full inch of snow fell overnight, and the morning news was full of warnings to be careful driving).
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You haven’t seen NASCAR fandom until you’ve unwittingly wandered into Concord on a race day. I used to work at the high school that was a block away from Lowe’s Motor Speedway. Fun times!

84

[QUOTE=butler1850]
<GASP!> a full inch??? :eek: How ever will they survive??? :smiley:

The same thing happens in DC… of course, I laughed at everyone that I was working with, and they weren’t happy that I thought their 2" storm was a joke.
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I had called a friend at work that day and in the course of the conversation made a comment similar to yours, which resulted in a firm lecture from her on how badly drivers here react to any snow on the roads. I was also asked if I had made the required pre-storm trip to the store to stock up on toilet paper and other “disaster” supplies.

I think the Sonic commercials are cute too. Although I do want to bitch-slap the guy when he starts all the cran- jokes. Of course, that could be because I know I’m likely to do the same thing.

ETA makes note to avoid Concord like the plague

85

[QUOTE=butler1850]
I knew there was one that was bugging me, but couldn’t remember what it was until I saw your post.

The reality about advertising is that anything that appeals to 18-27 year olds, will usually also appeal to 12-18 year olds. (Camel characters & pretty girls [for the boys] come to mind).
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And don’t forget the “conspiracy theory” one where they say that the convenience-store cigarette posters are deliberately placed at child’s-eye level. Because if they were aimed at adults, they’d be at adult-eye level. Right between your face and the cashier’s.

86

I have to say that a couple recent Jack in the Box ads have really been rubbing me the wrong way.

(1) The burger ad where they brag about the 100% sirloin they use and how the “other guy” uses the Angus! hahahahahaha! What a laugh riot! :rolleyes:

(2) The ad where they brag about how, since breakfast is the most important meal of the day, they serve breakfast round the clock! :dubious:

Both ads automatically assume I’m (a) a complete dumbass who doesn’t know the gaping factual/logical holes in these commercials, or (b) I really can’t think of what B might be. Who would approve these unless they had complete contempt for their intended audience, who they think either wouldn’t mind the stupidity or not see through it?

Ugh.

87

I drive past a really weird ad on my way to work. It’s a smallish billboard on the side of a rundown mom & pop store in a dilapidated part of the city at the edge of downtown. It features a line drawing of some poor heifer suspended in a four-strap harness, with only the words “COW LIFT 2000” and a phone number. It makes my brow wrinkle every single time.

88

Then there’s the ad, frequently seen at bus stops in my town, I think It’s advertising pretzels, it’s a half-eaten pretzel. The caption: “There’s a great butt in every bag.”

89

Two ads I can’t figure out:

The commercial for Starburst candies where some effeminate weirdo in a Little Lord Fauntleroy costume starts jumping up and down chanting “Berries and Cream! Berries and Cream!”. I really can’t tell who their intended market is there. Yeah, I’ll remember the name of the product. But just the memory of the commercial is enough to make me avoid the entire candy aisle.
The anti-drug commercial where the dog is talking to the girl, telling her that he misses the way she used to be. In the commercial, the girl is looking at the dog with a flat affect, no doubt because of the insidious effects of marijuana. In real life, she’d be thinking, “Talking dog? Wow, that’s great stuff! I have to do more of that.”

90

Years ago there was a billboard that had a picture of a baby on it that said: Sledworks or spit!

I have no idea what Sledworks sells/sold or where they were/are located.

91

[QUOTE=tdn]
But maybe I wouldn’t be so hot if I weren’t so fagged and could get off my arse to turn the AC from zed to eleven.
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Oh bollocks. If you were really a hot Englishman you’d know the British don’t hold with AC (still having a problem with central heat for that matter). I bet the Queen doesn’t even have AC.

92

The tofu ads with various variations on “He knows Japan *too * well.”

WTF? What does that have to do with bean curd?

93

[QUOTE=Finagle]

(snip)

The anti-drug commercial where the dog is talking to the girl, telling her that he misses the way she used to be. In the commercial, the girl is looking at the dog with a flat affect, no doubt because of the insidious effects of marijuana. In real life, she’d be thinking, “Talking dog? Wow, that’s great stuff! I have to do more of that.”
[/QUOTE]

Funny. Over in slate, one column is written to critique ads. And they specifically mention that one as a good way to deliver the message to the target audience (teenagers, I guess).

94

Aflac. Quack.

95

In the mornings, while getting ready for work, I watch ESPN2, where there’s a recurring ad for “Timeshares Only” - we turn your timeshare or campground membership into cash!

Well, if that is true, then you aren’t timeshares only, now are you?

AAArrrggghhhh!!

96

[QUOTE=Weirddave]
Any ad by Truth makes me want to jam scores of cigarettes into my mouth, nose, ears and anus and smoke, smoke, smoke.
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Some of the Truth ads are tolerable, some aren’t. By far the worst is the one that implies that Muppets smoke cigarettes and- even worse slander- only appeal to children.

97

[QUOTE=magellan01]
Aflac. Quack.
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You know – this one is kind of ironic in a roundabout way. Whenever I see “Aflac” I think “That’s Calfa, backwards.” Calfa being Don Calfa, whom I remembered from back in the mid-80s from his role in Return of the Living Dead because I had the movie poster on my bedroom wall.

Aflac life insurance. Zombies. Trash dancing nude on a headstone. Good times, good times.

<quack> Braaaaaaiiinnsss!

98

I can’t stand the commercials for Orbit gum! You know the ones I’m talking about, “Dirty mouth? Keep it clean with orbit…” They come on and I change the channel. I just can’t find the genius in it. However, I’m talking about the commercial right now so I guess it did make an impact on me and leave a lasting impression - just not a good one.

99

I hear this radio ad for Blue Bell ice cream every morning. I couldn’t find an audio version of it, but trust me, the country music and singer are as corn ball as the lyrics:

*I remember our old country home
Clean fresh air and the flowers growing
In the fields, along the path, beside our swimming hole

Momma hollering through the screen
Would you kids like some homemade ice cream?
That was such a simpler time and place
Blue Bell tastes just like the good old days*

The line about Momma hollerin’ through the screen makes me :rolleyes: everytime. When my family lived in Austin, I ate my share of Blue Bell. It’s good ice cream, but this ad is so goofy, I think I’ll pass until they get a new ad.

Ah, the early 80’s - that was such a simpler time and place (sniff).

100

[QUOTE=brewha]
Picture this: A guy is walking down the street and gets mowed over by a 10’ beach ball. He manages to get on top of the beach ball as it goes by. He then rides on top of the beach ball through the streets of San Francisco. The ad ends with the slogan “More Happy”. Different commercial, same premise. Except, this time, we have a 100’ beach ball and it is getting passed around by crowds of people and a whale. Once again the ad ends with “More Happy”.

What in the name of Thor’s bleeding asshole makes Pepsi think that these 30 sec slots of drivel will make me want to buy their soda?
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If that happened to you, would it really make you happy? More likely, it would make you battered and bruised and heading for the ICU. An amazingly stupid commercial.

[QUOTE=gotpasswords]
The Sonic ads are really dumb around here. What makes them particularly dumb around here? There are no Sonic Drive-Ins within 100 miles of here! Yes, they keep plugging away. Only thing I can think of is that they’re hoping people will say “Hey, that looks good!” go to the website, be disappointed to find none around and possibly email them to ask when they’ll be in the area. Yeah, a bit of a long shot…

Those Carl’s ads that sound like there’s a microphone in the guy’s mouth as he eats? Repulsive. Are they trying to differentiate themselves in the fast food market by making you sound like the grossest slob in town when you eat their burgers?
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I actually saw a Sonic a couple of weeks ago, when I was driving down Highway 99 on my way to Kings Canyon. I think it was in Fresno, or someplace just north thereof. Nevertheless, your point is well taken: that would be a hell of a drive for someone living on the Peninsula just to get those tater tots. (I think they appear as part of cable channels’ national ad campaigns; I can’t remember seeing a Sonic commercial on any of the local broadcasts.)

As for the CJ’s ads: I used to be in the habit of watching TV while running the sound through my stereo, listening to the audio through headphones. You can’t imagine disgusting till you’ve heard someone slobbering his way through a Super Star in full stereo sound, right in your ears.

[QUOTE=Secret Volcano Lair]
I hate Ovaltine commercials.

“HAY GUISE MY MOM IS MAKING RICH CHOCOLATE OVALTINE!!!”

“I LOVE RICH CHOCOLATE OVALTINE!!!”

“YAAYYYYYYYYYY!!!”
[/QUOTE]

They make a point of mentioning “rich chocolate Ovaltine” because, if you took a slurp of that shit, there’s no way you’d figure it was supposed to taste like chocolate. Liquified gila monster, perhaps, but not chocolate. Only kids could be stupid enough to drink that stuff and call it chocolate. It probably says a lot about the product that the only time I hear those ads is on the radio. On the talk radio station. Late at night. Mixed in with the painting and roofing commercials, and the ads about “proven systems” to make you rich. Way to target the young audience, guys.