Neither one will eat a single vegetable under the pain of torture or the threat of death itself.
I’ve tried, bribing, threats and reason.
I’ve served them raw, cooked, creamed, in a soup, in juice form… everything.
It’s like poison to them. They will sooner not eat the entire dinner than have a vegetable.
I’m at my wits end. Neither is sick or malnurished but I’m constantly worried that they are not getting some necessary nutrients. They will eat fruit, but vegetables are a constant battle ground and I always lose.
I’d still keep serving them up on the plate but leave it up to them when and if they try them. I’d ask them to try a vegetable at each meal but no threats if not. Your kids are at the peak time for faddiness, in my experience.
Of the kids I know that eat veggies after going through faddy stages, the above tactic was used. Those that won’t eat veggies, well their partents stopped serving them on the plate in the hope they’d try them later on, but it never happened.
Other tactics (which have worked for some family/friends):
• take your kids to the supermarket and get them to choose a veggie to eat
• make a finite list of food stuffs that your children can object to. Anything else can be served up. If they want to add something to the list, then something has to come off.
• Healthy eating education - need for a balanced diet, which foods give which benefits.
• Hiding vegetables in sauces, soups etc.
I also used going out to eat as an incentive. She liked feeling grown up and chosing her own food, trying bits of other peoples’ etc.
Eventually, my daughter came to understand that not everything she ate had to be something she really, really liked. If it was good for you and wasn’t offensive, then it had its place. Now she’s reasonably adventurous.
There comes a time in every parent’s life when they are frustrated enough with their children’s eating habits that they are ready to accept french fries as a vegetable. Been there, buddy. SirDoris gives some pretty good advice - I particularly love the finite list suggestion, as well as the practice of continuing to offer without force. Also, if and when you do get them to try a veggie, don’t be alarmed if they do weird things with them - my daughter insisted that green beans should be eaten like french fries, held with the fingers and dipped in ketchup (BLEEECH!)
For the record, kids need a shockingly small amount of food to get by - something bizarre like a tablespoon of food per meal, per ten pounds of body weight. IANA pediatrician, so don’t quote me on that, but when my daughter’s ped told me this, I almost fell over. Also for the record, kids’ cereals these days are so fortified that they can actually get a fair amount of actual nutrition from a bowlful.
My only contribution to this matter would be my own childhood memories, since I’m not a parent. I was a picky eater as a child, and my parents had an effective strategy to deal with this, imo. They never forced me to eat anything I didn’t want, but if I didn’t eat what was served, I wasn’t given any other choices. Both my parents were immigrants from Eastern Europe, and had personal experience with REAL hunger. They knew that I wasn’t going to starve to death, and that eventually hunger would drive me to eat what was on my plate. As I grew older, the pickiness vanished and I calmly ate whatever they prepared. True, I enjoyed some dishes better than others, but I quickly learned that just because you don’t like how something tastes doesn’t mean it will harm you. I also developed an interest in trying new things, and came to be what some now call ‘an adventurous eater.’
They say they don’t like the taste. But I’m certain it has to do with texture as well because breaded fish sticks are fine but the same fish grilled is out of the question.
I’ve done the eastern europian thing as well. (That was my childhood as well.) They simply won’t eat until breakfast the next morning. I’ve even tried serving dinner for breakfast but they’ll skip breakfast as well if forced to eat vegetables. I just don’t feel right sending them to school without eating - so I capitulate at that point and sheepishly offer cereal. I think they know I’ll fold like a house of cards and let me rant and rave until they get something they like. Evil little urchins!
You have my sympathies, QS. I’m sure my parents felt the same consternation, at least I’m assuming they did… they pretended it wasn’t a big deal, if I recall. Maybe that’s key here? My refusal to eat dinner wasn’t a big thing, and didn’t get me any attention if that was my ploy (I no longer remember if that was why, but I’m guessing it’s a good bet). I didn’t want dinner? They’d shrug and scrape the food off the plate back into the skillet or casserole, or stockpot and continue with their own conversation. Of course the same rejected dish would continue to appear until it was finished. Food was NEVER thrown out.
shrug
I wish you luck. Parenting is hard and you have my respect.
They will almost certainly grow out of it before adulthood; as a child I was a terribly picky (if odd) eater, and now I eat all sorts of things my parents blanch at. They had the “three bites” rule - you must try three bites of it, even if they’re little tiny bites. If you yourself put it on your plate, you’d better eat it. And there was no alternate food source - you didn’t eat it, that’s it.
It got easier when I was old enough to fill my own plate, as then I’d just take what I wanted and either die of scurvy or not.
Then again, I know somebody who’s 27 and still dosen’t eat her vegetables. Every so often she’ll eat a salad, but that’s it. One day all of her teeth are going to fall out.
They won’t starve. Even if they skip dinner and breakfast. I wouldn’t do that because I’m not into doing things I hate, and starting a war falls under that catagory.
I cook the food, with an awareness of what everyone likes. Then I serve it and everyone eats as desired. I don’t do alternate meals and I do not worry about it.
For the vegetables, plant a vegetable garden with the kids this spring.
Frozen peas are tasty finger food.
Shredded beets and zucchini are also tasty finger foods to me.
Baby carrots are crunchy and irresistable when eaten in front of the tv.
Teach both kids to examine and select veggies and fruits and put them in charge of selecting the family’s supplies at the store. They may not like tomatoes, but they’ll know good from bad and have pride of ownership when the family eats them.
Trust me. Sprinkle Parmesan cheese on it or cover it with melted Cheddar.
Remember, no dessert if they don’t eat at least three bites of the veggies. And some veggies they just may not like. I don’t like Brussel sprouts, and I don’t like broccoli unless it’s raw, but I’ll eat peas and green beans like they’re going out of style.
Stop fighting with them. Serving last night’s dinner for breakfast is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard of. Do you really want to waste so much time and energy on something so inconsequential? They aren’t going to die of not eating vegetables. This is just a power struggle now. It’s not about the vegetables, it’s about who can win the fight. Stop making a big deal out of it, and your life will be much easier.
If you are really so concerned about the vegetables, grate them and hide them in spaghetti sauce or something. Feed your kids zuchinni bread, or pumpkin bread. Another option is substituting fruit for vegetables. If they won’t eat cooked carrots or whatever, offer them apple slices or orange sections instead.
If you insist on their eating actual vegetables, stay away from canned vegetables, because those are just gross. Frozen vegetables are not much better. They are limp and soggy with no flavor. Go for the fresh veggies.
