EBayer by proxy - no, I will not sell your stuff for you

The BBQ Pit
1

In my immediate family, I’m the only one that has a real working grasp of computers. (Webmaster by trade, geek by nature.) I have zero problems helping out friends and family when their computers go on the fritz. I’m a helpful gal!

So when my mother in law asked me to help her sell some camera lenses on eBay, I didn’t really have a problem with it. I hadn’t sold on eBay before - hell, I’ve only bought off of eBay twice - but she has no computer, she was sitting on at least $2500 worth of lenses, and I know she’s a reliable person who would ship the stuff out on time. Sure it was an inconvenience for me to handle the cash and keep addresses straight, but it’s my mum-in-law and I wub her.

So, a few months later my sister in law wants me to help her sell her lens (that her mom gave her) and two other items (one probably sellable, the other most likely not at all). So, I explain sellers fees, the whole process, etc. She says that she’ll do all the shipping. Fine.

We sell the lens. It helps that I had perfect feedback from the 11 other buyers of lenses in the past. The guy pays via Paypal. I email him and tell him we will ship within 2 days (I have to get the cash from Paypal into my bank account). SIL comes to pick up the money in a drama snit over her current relationship so I neglect to mention my seller fees. I make sure she has the address to ship it to.

TWO WEEKS go by and the buyer emails me. “WHERE IS MY LENS?” (Verbatim. Caps and all.) I call SIL and get the tracking # and email it to him.

He responds the next day. “I consider 20 days between payment and shipping grounds for negative feedback.”

I’m floored. I respond back that I agree entirely. I explain I was doing a favor for family and since they didn’t hold up their end of the bargain, I’m done with eBaying by proxy. I wish him future success with the lens and apologize.

20 goddamn days it took that lazy broad to get off her ass and go to the post office. Well, selling on eBay is now screwed for her mother so I call her and apologize and explain that I can’t list the last three lenses, when you’re showing as 8% negative feedback that puts a damper on how many bidders you’re going to get and frankly I don’t have the time or energy to explain to prospective bidders that they are certainly not going to have to wait 20 days for their product. Mum was OK with it - her exact words are “I thought she might drop the ball” - and said that she repeatedly contacted her daughter about getting the thing shipped and OFFERED TO SHIP IT FOR HER, but SIL refused. Christ.

So I leave a message on SIL’s machine explaining the conversation via email with the buyer and told her that since my feedback is shot, its a moot point to try to sell anything else, either her other two items (which she listed twice and never sold) or Mum’s last three lenses.

SIL and I go waaaay back and suffice it to say, she’s never wrong. About anything. Unless we go through a huge drawn out battle and I’m not about to get involved in that. She can stew over it for all I care. I’m not going into a blow-by-blow conversation about how she fucked it up. Especially if she wasn’t so needy she could have gotten on eBay HERSELF and READ ABOUT SELLING (like I had to do) and SELL IT HERSELF.

The sizable silver lining on this dark cloud of familial unrest is the fact that I can now easily turn down any family member wanting me to eBay stuff for them. And there was starting to be a line, believe me. Uncle wanted me to sell his freakin’ 84 Corvette. On eBay. Ever heard of a classified ad, people? The guy can’t pay his car payment, what makes him think I’ll trust him to pay me my seller fees on a car??

SIL left a message on our machine yesterday (which I refused to listen to last night - call me passive aggressive but the rest of my day went SOOOOO well that I didn’t feel like ruining my good mood). Hubby says “It doesn’t sound like she hates you” but knowing my hubby that could mean almost anything.

So, to sum up:

  1. I Pit my SIL for once again not following through and screwing me - and her mom - over. (Mostly her mom.)
  2. I Pit people who think eBay is this magical place where people will buy whatever tripe you happen to dig out of your closet at the price you think you should get for it. Double Pitting to people who want me to do it because they’re too lazy to learn how to do it themselves.
  3. I Pit myself for getting this whole ball rolling in the first place. I should have just said “eBay? Never heard of it.”
    To the naysayers: Yes, I need to grow a set of balls when it comes to SIL. However, she is vicious, quick-tempered, easily insulted, and has been (on and off) a good friend to me for 10 years - she just has some personality flaws. She’d still run into a burning building to save me. Plus I’m married to her brother and I’d like to keep it that way - so I’m willing to swallow a little self-righteous pride to keep familial relations smooth. At least I have the Pit to blow off steam.
    Let this thread die, if it must. I feel better now.
2

I agree you have every right ot be upset, I just think that you are overplaying the devastating effects of a single negative feedback. You can leave a response to the feedback and if you keep selling and buying on eBay to get your score back up.

3

Sorry to hear about your probs.
If you ever HAVE to sell for someone again, do what I did.
When my mother-in-law wanted me to sell something on e-bay for her, I set up her own account, using her information. Granted, she had no feedback, but hey, everyone has to start off somewhere.

4

So… did he actually give you negative feedback or did it end at the threat?

Oh… and here -Buy my eBay crap!

5

My wife sells things on eBay for our friends all the time. She takes the item from them, posts the auction, accepts payment, ships the item, and then gives the friend the money, minus shipping and a small commission. Friend is happy because they’ve turned their junk into cash with no effort, getting a better price because it was sold by a trustworthy seller. Wife is happy because she made a few bucks and added another point to her rating.

You know by now that where this fell apart is that you depended on someone else to do something that had the potential to harm you if they failed. I’m sorry that you have to chalk it up under “no good deed goes unpunished.”

6

If the person did leave negative feedback you can respond to it and explain to future customers that what happened will never happen again. Thats if you change your mind about selling stuff online.

I dont shop from E-bay much, but when I do, if I see a negative remark I read it, and if I think the seller has justified the reasoning as to why something is late, then Il still buy from them… Im sure Im not the only one who acts this way.

7

We are sorry, due to the lack of use of the required Pit Words, such as Fuck, Fuck Me Three Ways to Sunday, What The Fuck!, Fucktard, Fuckadilious, goat felching duck fuckers and any variation thereof, this OP is not offensive or filled with enough moral outrage to fan the flames of 100,000 burning dogs and its bearing is most reasonable, ergo, unacceptable for the Pit.

You may apply to MPSIMS where it will be happily greeted with warm fuzzy kisses, cookies and non-sequiters up the butt and out the wazoo.
Please resubmit your entry with the appropraite obscenities and try again.

Thank you for your attention in this matter.

8

It depends on what her rating was prior to SIL’s FU. If she had a couple hundred positives, it shouldn’t be too bad. But if she had say, fifty positives, she’s a little more screwed.

The real loss is the loss appeal she’ll have to prospective bidders. Depending on what she’s selling, some folks might simply look for another seller rather than risk having a bad experience. It might take a long time before she can restore her rating.

Leaving a response to the negative might not save her. If she says the late shipping wasn’t her fault because someone else was supposed to do it, prospective bidders will think she does not have control of her inventory. And again, rather than risk a bad experience, bidders will probably look elsewhere.

My sympathies to you, Twmd…. Because SIL knows jack about eBay, she does not know the consequences you’re paying because her actions. Pray for karma.

9

Refer her to the Training Assistants program. This will allow her to find someone who will help her at a pre-arranged cost, rather than just doing it for free. Explain to her that this is how you’ve ‘helped’ her. :slight_smile:

Try here.