Elevator Pitch Superhero Movies

Doctor Strange 2: Mordo returns to hunt Dr. Strange, but Strange doesn’t realize he has turned evil. Mordo takes him by surprise (eg without his magic implements) and traps Strange in the Mirror Dimension… permanently. Strange tries to use his incredible mystic skills to return to Earth, but finds it is indeed impossible to return without a Sling Ring. However, the Mirror Dimension is “closer to the Dark Dimension,” as we have learned. Strange discovers a way to escape to the Dark Dimension, but has to make his way across this strange alien landscape without his most powerful tools. Along the way he meets Clea, and is pursued by Dormammu (who no longer has reason to fear him!)

There. I wrote it, it’s on the internet, and when Marvel makes it they will owe me money.

Anyone else got an idea for a movie?

Mine is more like an SNL superhero skit.

A year has passed since Thanos killed off half the universe. Captain America sets up a meeting in downtown L.A.

Cap: Black Widow, you’re sure here earlier than usual.

BW: Yeah, traffic was like nothing coming in. I even had time to pick up Starbucks for everyone.

Cap: Where’s Thor?

BW: Last I heard he was at Disneyland.

Thor (bursting into the room): Guys, you have got to go to Disneyland. I got on Space Mountain like 15 times before noon.

Banner: Hey, anybody want some tickets to Hamilton?

Cap,BW,Thor: Nah, seen it too many times already.

Banner: Damn, I can’t give these things away.

Cap: Okay, so has anybody come up with an idea to defeat Thanos and reset the universe?


Cap: Yea, so, meet again here say next year?

All: Sounds good.

Cap: Cool, so after party at my place. I got this sweet place up in Malibu for a steal.

Two words (and a hyphen):

Ultimate Stilt-Man

Stripperella - The Movie (add a Deadpool cameo just for fun)

Deadpool 3

Vanessa is busted on a parole violation and gets assigned community service as a candy striper in a hospital. Unfortunately, the city is in the midst of a crime wave and the hospital is overwhelmed with patients. In her time off, Vanessa is exhausted. Deadpool teams up with Colossus, Negasonic, and whatever other X-Men we can afford to help clean up the city. DP pretends he’s changed his ways, but he’s just trying to keep a lid on the violence so he can get some hot monkey lovin’ from Vanessa.

In a side plot, Blind Al’s Ikea creations get a gallery show and she becomes the darling of the art world.

Everybody in the Marvel fights the all-powerful god of another universe, who has a perm and wears a white leisure suit.

That sounds terrible. Why would anyone write a tory like that? :stuck_out_tongue:

Here’s where some lower-power heroes can shine. Die Hard but with a lone superhero on a spaceship.

Doctor Occult: saving the day while making superheroics look like heroics. The grateful damsel in distress says I saved her from a wild-man assailant? Well, then, officer, I won’t talk like a crazy person who deduced where a werewolf would hunt; I’m just a good samaritan out for a walk under a full moon. The silver-plated bullets? They were a gift from your captain, after I rescued her from a guy who thought he was a vampire: he recoiled in horror when I brandished a holy symbol, giving me time to stab him with a piece of wood I saw there.

(You maybe heard about how back in October some robed cultists were about to use a ceremonial dagger to sacrifice an innocent on an altar? But then a do-gooder clad in a Halloween costume showed up and foiled them? I didn’t say the cape and the boots and the whole underpants-on-the-outside look is ritual garb worn when using a magic belt; I’m not delusional. I just said I was on my way to a masked ball.)

Captain America:
On his way to a meeting with Nick Fury, Steve Rogers gets stuck between floors with a claustrophobic citizen. Looking up, he quickly realizes that those handy escape hatches only open from the outside for safety reasons. Determined not to cause any damage, he presses the help button. He then heroically spends the next 90 minutes helping his companion stay calm while waiting for maintenance to get it going again. Filmed in real time.

That one’s been done.

A movie version of Misfits: people get weird powers based upon their deepest desire. And they don’t fight crime with it, either.

Elevator Pitchman: Has the power of being completely convincing, but only in a confined space that moves vertically, and only for a few minutes at a time. His goal - to find a hotel so ritzy that it has elevator operators to relieve its enormously wealthy customers of the need to do something so plebeian as pushing buttons - but he has a dark design should he get that job. Tension mounts as the numbers on the display increase…

“The Creeper”. He’s like the Joker, only a good guy.

Super Stuntmen:

Stuntmen in front of the cameras, superheros behind the scenes.

Batman: The Long Halloween. It would need to be a series on Netflix, or Amazon, or Hulu.

The Incredible Hulk, The Musical. I just want to hear The Hulk sing It’s Not Easy Being Green.

Squirrel Girl.

Can we cross platforms? How about the Tick vs The Hulk? The Tick is nigh-invulnerable. He should be able to take anything the Hulk throws at him. They eventually reach an understanding and become friends.

And if they can find some red superhero, they can form the League of RGB, and can do battle against the evil organization Hurt Destroy Murder Inc.

Hey, I came up with it on the elevator, and I only went one floor…

Add in Deadpool and I think you have a winner -

“Friend - I think we need to be a little less stabby”