Endtroducing.....[drumroll please] Crack'dOff

Yes… There is a new member on the boards. His name is Crack’dOff and he is a friend… Everyone give him warm welcomes, and the proper SD greetings…Try not to scare him off. Hopefully, he won’t scare any of you off either, though I’m not holding my breath.

Hi. Fun. Here. Have some.

Hi Crack’dOff.

No, i’m not just saying this because Scratch told me to. No, really! Hi!

Hi. Oldie gave us all this link in #straightdope so we’re scared of him and consequently posting here.

Did he ever tell you about the dog?

Hi. I don’t scare. :smiley:

Whaddaya mean I can’t scare him off?

Oh, right, I’m not scary :frowning:

Enjoy your stay :slight_smile:

I scare easily.
Please don’t hurt me with plungers.
Oh wait. That doesn’t hurt. Plungers have more than one purpose.
Who would have ever thougth that?
A plumber maybe? They have good imaginations.
I am not scared anymore. Never again will I be frightened of the unknown. only of the known. Even then I will not be scared, only apprehensive and chattery. Even then I will eat cotton candy flavored salad dressing to calm my nerves. WHat a wonderful world.
Oh what was I saying?
Yah yah. Welcome welcome Cracked Off. Have fun in the pleasure room, and please don’t touch the gold fixtures. They are for Ed Zotti, and Ed Zotti only.

pat

Well, hello Crack’dOff. I’m only here cause Oldie told me I had to post or else he’d hurt me real bad. No seriously, welcome to the board! I hope you enjoy it here. If we can handle oldie, i think we can handle you looks nervously out of the corner of his eye at oldie…

Thank you all for the welcome. I’m looking forward to my time here (even more so than my time with oldscratch in Langley Porter. :slight_smile: Ahh…those were the days (14 to be exact).

No, he didn’t. He’s threatening to now, though. Do I really WANT to know?

You’re welcome. :slight_smile:

I’m pretty sure that story can be found here, if you’re really curious.

Wow . . . his first post and he quotes me. I feel so . . . honored or something.

It was a thread about a phrase abbreviated TMI. We all know it well here. People got into a contest to see who could post the most TMI thing.

Oldie won . . . others tried, but when Oldie posted about the dog we all sorta admitted defeat.

Crack’dOff

God, what a name! Capitals, apostrophes, double letters …oh my! Well, we’re not in Kansas anymore, Toto.

Oh well, despite my having to scroll up and down three times just to spell your name right (and I’m still not positive?) Welcome!

I’m still somewhat of a newby here myself but it’s not a real bad place to be (Pssst, avoid the pit …nothing but a bunch of degenerate psychos over there).

Anyway, enjoy and learn. IMHO, your friend oldscratch has just turned you on to the most addictive and gratifying site the net has to offer. Thank him or kill him, I’m not sure which.

“You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave”.

Hermit

well, if my assorted threads haven’t been enough to send GuanoLad into apoplectic fits, then Crack’dOff’s threads will.

heh.
be very very scared… this man is armed, he is dangerous, he is a fucking loon. I’m scared to sleep tonight. That’s why I’m up at 3:20 am…
If I disapear from the boards. Call the police.

oldscratch

Insomnia, apoplectic fits, dangerous loon, armed and dangerous? Sounds like one of us, so whats the problem?

By the way, nice to meet you.

Hermit

You’re only scared because of that meaan trick me and you pulled on him earlier in chat :slight_smile:

looks sweetly over at Crack’d…

No, I was scared far before now…

Have you seen what he does to his cats? :eek:
:shudders:

Jeez! See what happens when I sleep? My second favorite person on the West Coast goes ahead and becomes a member!

I have to break this all to you. Not only is Crak’d (may I call you C’dO? Too bad, I’m gonna) not scary, he is incredibly not scary. This is a man that allowed oldscratch to house sit for his 3 cats for almost a month. My arrival in California coincided with C’dO’s return from his 3 week long business trip. In the kindness and charity that is C’dO, he graciously allowed me not only to stay at his condo during my trip, but he also gave scratchie and I his own bed, so that we didn’t have to share a couch! (Um by the way, sorry we traumatized Outside Kitty… heehee)The man hadn’t slept in his own bed in a month, folks! Can you get any kinder? He also didn’t complain when we turned his shower pink and purple from dying my hair. We have a winner!

Female Dopers, take note. He’s one of the good guys. I am now accepting applications to get to know C’dO better… hey, it’s my job. I promised him. :wink:

Anyway, welcome aboard. Glad to have you. I think you’ll find it much like Langley Porter, except you get to keep your belt and shoelaces.

Oh, and you are a de facto member of the posse. Don’t ask.

Doob is eeeeevil. That’s why I like him though. :slight_smile:

I suppose any friend of scratchie’s is going to become one of my harem eventually. What do you bring to the table, Crack’d?

Of course Doob is evil. But if Crack is a friend of scratchie’s, then he’ll probably be evil too…welcome aboard.