You have no right to be mean to me for being dumb or ignorant!
You break your own rules!
By my rules, I can take the teasing and ridicule. But by the rules of fat people, you can’t sling your hatred-filled remarks at me!
This is the Pit, and there is no apology needed.
I’m miserable, just like I’m miserable when I take nasty medicine to make me better, or get up early to make it to work on time, or get my teeth cleaned. Short term misery for long term success.
The part emphasized is very obviously a lie, unless you care to weasel around “moo” somehow.
** Philster**-I applaud both you and your wife for being "hot.
However, as much as I hate to be the one that breaks the bad news to you, one day you’ll also find yourself becoming gasp older.
Now, I understand that you’ll still both have your perfect bodies. After all, a couple as highly disciplined as you, would never allow life to throw you any curves.
No chance of you contracting an ailment that requires medications that spike a weight gain.
No chance that you may become unable to adhere to your work out schedule.
However, given that your ideal woman is an 18-25 year old Playboy bunny, what will you do when your wife develops crows feet and wrinkles? Baggy neck skin? Age spots?
You’re right. It is the Pit. You aren’t required to apologize.
But you seem to fail to recognize the difference between a justified rant and a random, totally uncalled for comparison of a person with a cow. The former is prone to admiration from onlookers, depending on the ranter’s eloquence. The latter is prone to a severe drop in regard from onlookers, especially when it’s as random and unjustified as the “Moo” was.
And I don’t know how short-term your misery is. You appear to be rigidly guarding yourself against taking any pleasure at all out of eating. Your attitude seems to be, regarding the women in your office, “How dare they enjoy that evil, fat-producing food? And laugh about it as if it were perfectly innocent? Evil women! Burn theeeemmmm!” Okay, that last may be an exaggeration; I’ve watched too much Salem Witch Trials this week…
As much as I hate to admit Philster might be right about something, in attempting to give him a dose of his own medicine, I’ve been hypocritical. For that, I apologize.
Now, I will try to say this in a way I would say it face-to-face. Please, Phil, be nice. I understand how you feel about weight. A lot of people feel that way. Being deliberately cruel to another person because of their weight, however, is unacceptable public behavior.
Save your ‘tough love’ tactics for your children. The real world isn’t the military and most of the adults I know don’t respond well or appreciate being treated like that.
I don’t condone making fun of anyone, fat or not. However, I don’t think it’s unreasonable that criticisms be made on an anonymous messageboard. Obviously, some of you are overweight and proud of it. Good for you. But, some others have complained that they can’t get laid, or that they feel like a loser.
Your weight is in your control, you can do something about it. It’s a small percentage who have some out of control metabolic disorder. I work with a bunch of women who are always on a diet, but they’re forever bringing in cakes, cookies, whatever. They cryass about being fat, but sit there and eat all day long. I don’t “diet,” but I try to use common sense when choosing what I eat. I also work out regularly. If I gain a few pounds, I cut back, nothing drastic necessary because I’ve never gotten out of control.
I think everyone’s so sensitive about it because they know they could be doing something about it. My .02.
Whether fat people can or cannot do something about their fatness is irrelevant. It is their fatness, to have and to hold, to fight against, to embrace, to not care about or to obssess over.
Eveyone is so sensitive about it because making fun of fat people is an asinine thing to do whether you do it in face to face or whether you do it on an anonymous messageboard.
Bitterness permeates the post above. I don’t get the bitterness over someone being proud of taking care of one’s self. I don’t get it. Chastised for taking care of one’s self.
Duh. As we age, I’ll only be able to fantasize about young hot women. Wait! Let me live in the fantasy world where every spouse suddenly becomes oblivious to younger hotter people!
It’s natural to love your spouse yet not be so ignorant as to
accept that you might :gasp: still notice other people!
I don’t think one must feel pride in it to say that it is nothing to be ashamed of. Eh?
Making fun of people because they’re fat, gay or whatever is just immature. You have your own beliefs, fine. You don’t even need to justify them if you don’t want to.
But its damn immature and petty to vocalize and run down the people that “bother you” so much. Fat ladies load up on donughts and coke. So what? How are they hurting you, really?
Likewise, for the large amongst us. The US has a disturbing amount of overweight people. You are deluding yourselves if you honestly believe its all genetic or can’t be helped due to some medical conditions. Diet and exercise would do absolute wonders for the vast majority of the population.
Well Phil, that’s nice, but it doesn’t discount Option “B” that I provided, does it?
You’re right Phil, I should just suck it up when people mock me. When complete stranges make comments about my weight and appearance. I should just accept that people I don’t even know feel the need to comment on my size.
No…I have no horse in this race, but I’ll happily be a member of the anti-anti-fat brigade simply because there IS an anti-fat brigade, and they appear to be somewhat warped. My main objection is to: “How dare they enjoy food. Why aren’t they dieting.” There is no law, no consensus, no cite available for the notion that ‘everyone should be as small as they possibly can’ just because they can. They might have a point with regards to health issues. But that’s it.
I’m hypoglycemic with a warp-drive metabolism, prone to being bony if I’m not careful. Prone to being suddenly on the floor of the bank if I’m not careful. I can’t eat the really good stuff either, it causes havoc with blood sugar levels. (Eating is a chore, like brushing teeth.) So, my body style is entirely thanks to biological issues, and my face would be in a key lime pie every day if I didn’t have them. Key lime pie is very good.
My husband has weight issues. So now he avoids desserts. “I’m dieting.” We go out…he has this skimpy-looking chicken entree for supper, I have my usual fish with veggies…plates are cleared, time for coffee and tea…“and dessert?”
“No. I’m on a diet.”
&%$?! I want one forkful of key lime pie, with a smidgen of whipped cream. That’s it. That’s all I ask. He’s worried about .4 millimeters of cellulite is his nether regions, which is all that one piece of pie could possibly relate to for someone without blood sugar issues…and he says “No.” Not only did I not get my 1 or 2 square inches of steak, now I don’t get the pie.
I freaking hate when people diet.
Anyway…I can think of a zillion reasons why people don’t eat like I do, and most of them are “because it’s a pain in the neck.” Not the least bit enjoyable. I can think of a few reasons why the same husband has not the slender and toned physique…first of all it’s not in his genetic code so it wouldn’t come naturally, and second because he enjoys food - many people do - and third because he doesn’t need one for anything besides health reasons - he’s active, healthy, successful in his field, nice guy, great father to his kids and his wife is after his ass all the time. Everyone’s happy, thank you very much.
So the “fat = unhappy loser” view is entirely unsupported. Voicing it here leaves you open to the possibility that someone just as non-fat as you will come along and call you an asshole, and really mean that you appear to be an asshole. That’s my two cents. 
Tee - why can’t you order your own pie?
It’s a running joke between the two of us. 
I’m not really supposed to have it.
Am I deluding myself that it isn’t that big of a deal?
Unless I know and care about someone, their opinion means jackshit to me. Someone I don’t know thinks I am fat and that makes me a loser (and no, I’m not at all implying that’s what Rexdart said) ? Heh, great – Good for them. My car will still start when I get in it, my dog and fiancée will still be glad to see me when I get home, Dinner will still taste as good, I still will enjoy some TV or a book before bed, and then I’ll still go and get a good night’s sleep.
I’m not saying it’s OK for people to be mean to other people. But why let it ruin your day if someone is a jerk?
Well, some days it’s just a little harder to let the comments slide and be content with one’s appearance regardless of other people’s opinions.
erislover, just to clarify your previous post, are you saying changing one’s diet or amount of exercise “isn’t that big of a deal”?
Absolutely not. If you are overweight and you sincerely don’t care, all the power to you. However, I sincerely hope that most people care if they are healthy or not, or realize they are putting themselves in a far greater risk to die at a far earlier age than need be.
But, if a person sincerely doesn’t even care about their own wellbeing, who is anyone to argue with them?
Sorry a bit more hijack, but my heart went out to you sperfur (sp?)…
These articles and others like it are familiar ones for me. I got the mistaken impression from your first post that you meant that no diet of any kind worked. I see that you have ample information at your disposal.
Also, I got to thinking about what you’d said regarding “I haven’t lost a pound in three weeks”.
Are you also on an exercise program? The scale is NOT your friend. In fact it’s no one’s friend. So, while you may not have “lost a pound” your body very well may be shedding fat. If you are adding muscle at the same time, you aren’t going to show a loss on the scale, in fact sometimes, you may show a gain. Did you do measurements? Or a “jean size” type before measurement?
Judging from the links you posted, you undoubtedly have some really good informatiion on that as well.
I know you didn’t want “help” but I’d like to offer an empathetic and hearty “you go girl” (you are a girl right?), hang in there, sometimes it takes a bit for that first obvious sign of change in our bodies.
IF you do decide you want more help or info, I have a ton of great sites too.
Bitterness? Hardly. I’ve been happily married for 22 years. My body’s in decent shape and Mr.Zania thinks I’m hot stuff.
Being a realist however, I am aware that I’m changing as I approach 50.
There are little lines around my eyes now and streaks of gray in my hair.
It doesn’t worry me because I know that I’m more than just a “hot” body to my mate.
Part of his attraction for me and part of my attraction for him is based on all the other things that we share.
God willing and if we live long enough, we’ll still find each other sexy-even when we resemble nothing more than a pair of old wrinkled cahooties to outsiders.
I’m not aware that I chastised you for staying in shape or taking care of yourself either,Phil.
I just pointed out that, despite your very best efforts, time will take it’s toll on you and Mrs. Phil.
I think I hit a nerve, 'tho.