ok, geekdom at its highest level aside…
i believe the star trek universes “Federation” would send someone like Picard to negotiate with the Star Wars “Federation”, having data, worf and troy along for protection and to sense any sith activity from good old Darth, of course if Guinan were around, The star wars “Federation/Empire” wouldn’t stand a chance, but the Destroyer can’t really outmaneuver the Enterprise because the Enterprise always finds a way to re-align the deflector array/dish what have you… and track some type of ion flux/anomaly shift in the pattern of some subspace hoolaboo that the destroyer would of course leave a trail of becuase Darth is too involved in his wardrobe and dealing with too many childhood issues troy would be trying to help him with…
-have i made clear what an interesting episode of SpaceBalls revisited this might make if it were done on the Monty Python scale of themes?
-i’m just this regular guy, ya’ know? ~Zaphod Beeblebrox
Hehe thanks to Soulsling I just realized 2 things:
Conselor Troy could hopefully do wonders to Darth Vader. In episode 1 we never heard of who Vader’s father was. I personally believe this lack of a father figure is what Vader sought in the Senator Palpatine. Another example of the ill-effects of single motherhood.
The Federation may not do so well against Stormtroopers as I previously believed. Marksmanship ability asides, the Federation might not be able to tackle a bunch of bad-guys who don’t lumber along (The Borg) or stupidly engage in hand to hand combat when a Phasor would work just as well (The Klingons).
All in all I still believe the Conselor Troy would be able to bring Luke and Darth back together. Then Darth, Luke and the Enterprise would find the secret weakpoint in the Death Star (probably without having to steal plans either), and the jiggle the reflector array and remodulate the doo-dad and save the day.
Luke and Darth did just fine on their own, thank you very much.
Two words, folks: Size matters. That bloody great ISD bearning down on the Enterprise, after they’d finished changing pantaloons and cleaning themselves they’d already be floating helpless in space.
Re: The ISD’s troubles taking a Corellian Corvette, brought up by the Illustrious Joe X… They were trying to capture the blockade runner. Being so close to the planets surface, I guess, made them decide to capture it in a running turbolaser exchange versus disabling it and chancing having it crash into the planet. See the beginning of TESB? Doesn’t a bloody great ISD get disabled in that?? Takes a big nose-dive towards Hoth??
Anyhow, after snagging it in the tractor beam and taking it into the belly hold, they proceed to board the corvette… notice how well the stormtroopers blast their way in? Exactly how many rebels survive the lasers? Count em as they march em out… How many reb’s die in the fracas? How many troopers die?
They’re better than they look, methinks.
Just forget about that Endor incident… that was the Emperor’s doing…
“Patience, my followers… Go easy on them, or else you’ll get bolts of blue lightning up the butt”.
Suffice it to say, if the Enterprise was boarded, I think they’d lose the fight.
According to the Star Trek: The Next Generation Technical Manual, section 11.3, page 130, a Galaxy-class starship generally carries 275 basic photon torpedo casings. All 275 may be used as photon torpedoes, or up to 1/4 of them may be used sensor probes.
Incidentally, page 129 says that up to 1.5 kilograms of antimatter may be loaded into the casing for use as a warhead. That’s quite a lot of antimatter. One ounce of antimatter colliding with one ounce of matter will produce an approximately one-megaton explosion (i.e. an explosion with the same destructive force as one million tons of TNT). 1.5 kilograms is a little over three pounds – that much antimatter, colliding with an equal amount of matter, will produce an explosion equal to 40-50 megatons of TNT.
A 40 megaton detonation hardly qualifies as a “pin prick”, even if the Star Destroyer has ray shields.
And a little warhead-strength comparison exercise:
[ul][li]A photon torpedo has a warhead strength of 40-50 megatons.[/li][li]The first hydrogen bomb, detonated on Eniwetok Atoll in 1952, had an estimated warhead strength of 12 megatons.[/li][li]The crater created by said 1952 hydrogen bomb was 6000 feet across.[/li][li]A Star Destroyer is about 6000 feet long.[/ul][/li]
Now, while a Star Destroyer IS made of super-tough metal alloys, an atoll is made of rock, which isn’t exactly a pooftah material. Without particle and ray shields protecting it, one photon torpedo will pretty much turn a Star-Destroyer-sized object inside-out.
Or at least, it should. The photon torpedo blasts seen on the show tend to be a lot wimpier, for some reason.
Enterprise D is Picard, who would talk Dath Vader to death. Kirk is another matter. While Darth Vader was saying “Evil will win because Good is Dumb”, etc., etc., Kirk would kill him.
Well, photon torpedoes can have a warhead of UP TO 40-50 megatons. They probably don’t launch fully loaded torps very often, since that’d be seen as overkill and, from most points of view “barbaric”.
Most photon torps you see flying would probably be a couple of megatons… maybe ten, maximum, for Romulan Warbirds. The 40-50 meg torps would be specially reserved for Borg. But that’s from a logistical standpoint, not an “Enlightened”, Federation standpoint. Who knows? Maybe the Enterprise always fires dud torps as “warning shots” all the time, and that’s why they never seem to do anything (except in “Generations”… man, that was cool).
It is nice having a strength gauge, though, for a photon torpedoes (kudos to Tracer!). Anybody have anything about proton torpedoes. I’m pretty sure they’re akin to hydrogen bombs, but I’ve got nil as far as the warhead-strength goes.
Borg: “WE ARE THE BORG. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED.”
Picard: “Be that as it may, I felt I should inform you that one Darth Vader has insinuated on numerous occasions that your maternal parent’s feet are encased in military foot wear.”
Borg: “YOUR SOCIETY WILL SERVICE…WHERE WILL WE FIND THIS DARTH VADER?”
Picard: "It is fortunate that I have spacial co ordinates for his location. Set your scanners to ‘Double Ugly’.
Spock: “Captain, these vessels are manuvering with aerodynamic control surfaces in the vacumn of space! Fascinating!”
Kirk: “Uhura, call Star Fleet Command. Tell them these people violate the laws of physics worse than we do. Mr. Chekov, screw the Prime Directive. Blow their ass off.”
Janeway: “Tuvok, who ARE these people?”
Chakotay: “My people can be evil too, but better.”
Dr. Bashir: “What an intersting skin condition, Mr. Vader. May I prescribe a lotion?”
Yeah, carnivorousplant, that was pretty funny, but I’m gonna take issue with one thing:
With the exception of the Force, ST violates physical laws a LOT more often than SW. Every time I heard La Forge toss out something about “tachyons” or “phase converters” or some other such nonsense I just have to cringe.
thank you Carnivorous!
yes, exactly!
Fellas and Broads, listen here, we see The Enterprise can fire a couple of torpedoes at the ISD and blow it to Kingdom come, There’s always some damned Vulcan, Android, Scottsman, or Blind Computer Technician capable of rearranging that damned deflector dish (…wonder what channels they get on that thing?..) to configure for the shields on the ISD to avoid having their torpedos miss like in ID4, and the ISD didn’t have transporter technology, so they couldn’t board the Enterprise, and transporting a torpedo in the ISD would work too, so the ISD is fucked, and Darth can take his little conehead self into his damned escape tie-fighter-pod which is nowhere near the size of a shuttle craft and crash land himself on some moon where Klingon children can have thier field day with him.
Thats if it ever came to blows, Kirk wouldn’t do it because he would go for The Princess knowing full well it was her father that he was up against, and he would settle for threatening to destroy the ISD if big o’l hard hat himself didn’t back off, Picard would definitely send Troy out to massage those childhood worries away, and bring peace to the galaxy so far far away, and if it was Voyager, well, it just might end up being a clone ship or something, so it doesn’t matter does it?
Thats settled it i think. The Enterprise would win. I suggest perhaps Battlestar Galactica’s ship though versus the ISD? much fairer. How about Sandmen from Logans Run vs. Starfleet Officers?
Tracer, Xwing’s are atmosphere ready, too. See the Xwing series of books. Thus the need for intakes I guess, they’re supposed to be a space/atmosphere superiority fighter. Though I can’t remember if they need the S-foils closed in order to fly thru atmosphere.
