Last night I had the following dream:
I was in some sort of sex museum with some female friends of mine. It most definitely was not the sex museum I went to in Amsterdam, as there was no 8 foot tall penis to be seen anywhere. The museum mostly consisted of displays. For those of you from Chicago, it reminded me of the “dead animal displays” at the Field Museum. One of the scenes was a guy felching a goat. Eeeewww. Though I had heard of the term “felching” before my forays in the SDMB archives, I didn’t know what the term meant, and I definitely never conceived of the practice of goat-felching before reading Pit threads.
So we are wandering this museum and I keep complaining about how there are no interactive displays. Finally we find a hidden door, and we all go in. We get in line and all strip naked. There are these tangles of conveyor belts going all over the place - like a really complicated baggage claim setup in an airport. Everyone gets paired off with someone and gets on their own private conveyor belt. The guy I get doesn’t seem quite right to me, but he keeps saying “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you. You have nothing to worry about.” So I go with him, and things are going fine, and I specifically remember thinking “Oh, I haven’t had an orgasm in my sleep for a while, this should be nice.” I’m figuring it’s my dream, I should be in store for a full body massage followed by some serious tongue lashing, right?
Then this guy asks me “When is the last time you got your hair cut?” I reply “Two days ago.” (In reality, I got my hair cut yesterday). He said, “It’s too long” and proceeds to pull out a barber’s electric razor and says he’s going to shave itdown to about 1/4 inches (Note, this was the hair on my head. I wake up in a total freaked-out panic.
Strange, eh?
