etv78 - Who the fuck do you think you are? [open spoilers for How I Married Your Mother finale]

The BBQ Pit
1

You know man, I’ve tolerated you thus far because even though you’re an idiot weirdo, it’s good practice to learn how to tolerate idiot weirdos because they are everywhere. It’s no use trying to follow them around and note their idiotic weirdness or you’ll just drive yourself crazy, while they remain blissfully unaware. And whatever, everyone has their problems. Everyone deserves tolerance.

Maybe it’s because I don’t follow you around the board like some other folks do but I haven’t seen you be too much of an asshole. I’ve seen a lot of people say you’re an asshole but I haven’t seen it. I must not care enough to notice.

But today - less than a week after I literally defended you by reporting a post by a poster that was going a bit overboard with their stalking nastiness - you fucking go full asshole on me by totally demeaning my lifestyle choices, calling me an “anomaly” and asserting that a show I’ve been watching for years was “not meant for me.”

Last night I watched the finale of How I Met Your Mother - after having watched its entire run for howevermany year - and gave my impressions of the episode here:

I thought the finale was fine. I wasn’t railing against it like the rest of the Internet, who seems to have lost their minds about it for some reason.

To that post, etv78 conjures up this response:

THE FUCKING WHATNOW?!?!

First of all, dickhead, nowhere in that post and nowhere on this board and nowhere in my life have I ever said I do not “desire companionship.” Dafuck? I have a dog. Does this mean I do not desire companionship? The character Robin ON THE SHOW has four dogs! What does this say about her?

Secondly, because I don’t desire kids I am both an ANOMALY and NOT THE AUDIENCE FOR THIS SHOW? Just because I don’t fantasize about dropping crotchfruit on my living room rug like your fantasy babymamas doesn’t mean that I am some sort of weirdo.

Do you know what television shows have kids? All of them. Every single fucking show ever. Because I am not a fucking psycho, I can enjoy any show ever made that has kids and/or parents in it. Even though I don’t want to have kids! I AM FUCKING SERIOUS!!

Even better, I go out and live life amongst kids and have a grand fucking time! And I still don’t want to have kids! And I’m still not a goddamn anomaly! And I still STILL don’t go around the internet pretending I have fake disabled children because I AM NOT A PSYCHO LIKE YOU.

And I don’t know if you’ve ever watched this show but most of the time, 3 of the main characters are single. Just like me. And most of the time, all 5 of the main characters don’t have kids, just like me. And the rest of the time? 3 of the main characters have married friends with kids JUST LIKE ME.

So what makes you a totally normal dude and totally the audience for this show? Is it that you’re married like Marshall and Lilly? Is it because you have a kid like them? Is it because you go on lots of dates like Ted? Is it because you’re a rich guy who bangs a lot of chicks like Barney? Is it because you’re a single gal just trying to balance life and work and figure out if she’s cut out for love?

Do you go on dates? Do you have a career? Are you married? Do you have kids? Do you even have friends? How is it that YOU are the audience for this show and I am not?

I’m guessing it’s because you’re a pathetic dickhead like Ted that spends all his time jerking off fantasizing about having kids because in your pea brain you feel that passing on your dumbass genes is going to be a real gift to humanity.

You know, you don’t have to BE or even LIKE the douchebag main character to be part of the audience of a show. I like to tune in to just fucking hate on Ted, because he’s a pathetic loser of a man just like you. But at least he has a job and stuff.

Anyway so screw you, you fucking waste of space. I see what everyone was saying now - you’re not just an idiot weirdo you are a full fledged asshole. I’m done even pretending to be nice to you because you are NOT a nice person and you are nothing but a selfish prick who apparently has no regards for the feelings or lifestyles of others.

If anyone has anything else to say about how etv78 is a delusional asshole, well, let’s hear it! I’m done talking about me!

2

Depends on what day of the week it is, and which messageboard he’s posting to at the time apparently.

Go nuts and do an advanced search. Have fun sifting the truth from the bullshit.

:wink:

3

If you’re wondering how he eats and breathes
(and other science facts),
Repeat to yourself: “It’s just a show,
And I really should relax.”

I dunno, I just kinda felt like sayin’ that.

4

Don’t hold back, ZipperJJ – it’s better if you let it all out and tell us how you really feel. :smiley:

5

I heard he’s currently working on a PhD in mommy board trolling.

Between that and watching TV maybe he just doesn’t have time for kids right now but would still like them someday. In the future they could create sock accounts and help with his postdoc work.

6

OMG! Who is the dickhead?

When people get real angry, I can’t follow who they are referring to.

Although, most of the time, when they refer to someone as a “dickhead”, they usually mean me.

Anyway, I hope that is not the case in this thread cuz I never did anything here to deserve that.

7

FWIW, I saw parts of the final episode. Had to work on HIMYM at work, so I was familiar (and still LOOOOOVE Allison Hannigan!) The ending was… fine. I liked it enough, but it’s just a fucking sitcom, Internet! GOD! some of the shit people posted about it on Yahoo was enough ranting to give people diarrhea! And I think if we edit out all the Ted scenes, we’d have an even better sitcom. Shit, Barney is why we watch it.

I certainly didn’t love the show as much as you, Zipper, but in your defense, I don’t desire children either. I can’t fathom my own offspring running home from a public school telling me how Jesus used to ride Velociraptors and soda is bad for me. :smiley:

To ETV78, I don’t desire companionship as a live-in girlfriend. I don’t desire a marriage, unless it’s for big money. Drinking buds and sex with girls is fine for me, and I’m certainly not an anomaly. Hell, even on the “Elementary” series, Sherlock despises marriage and thinks “falling in love” is a delusion. Sure, he’s a weird character, but guess what? He’s right on both, IMFHO.

So now that “… Mother” is over, can y’all send Allison to my house? I’ve got some hummus… (clicks tongue)

8

No, no Charlie. When we say “stupid dickhead” we mean you.

9

“Alyson”. A real fan would know that.

Or a stalker.

10

I think the OP already sifted the truth from the bullshit.:slight_smile:

Crotchfruit. It’s what’s for dinner.

11

He’s a sad little man who lives under a bridge. Don’t feed him.

12

Don’t feed him, don’t heed him, don’t read him, don’t need him.

13

I approve of this pitting.

14

Spoilerific!

15

Man, that sucks. I’m sorry. Asked a mod to fix it for me.

16

Look in the fucking mirror.

17

I couldn’t imagine living even a day in Eric’s head. He desires attention so much that it doesn’t matter where it comes from or why. Trolling mother boards and boards for parents with disabled children just to get an atta boy is so shockingly sad. It speaks to the fact that he has wrung all of the goodwill out of everyone around him both online and in real life because there is nothing inspiring, likable, respectable or even pity worthy about him. I do not believe for a second that he is actually being considered for a masters program, but in the event that this handwritten application (wtf?) to a program that doesn’t require a GRE score (lmao!), I hope that they screen online presence as a part of their admissions process.

18

You need so much more attention? That you’d interrupt somebody else’s (well-deserved) pitting to get more for yourself? Well, ok. Congrats, dickweed. Mission accomplished.

19

I also don’t want kids but the OP is still a freak for having a dog instead of a cat, like I and all sane people do.

20

Well, dogs are easier to cook and have more meat but cats just have that je ne sais quoi flavour. I think they are pretty even there. Of course, the cat also comes with a pan of shit that you get to keep in your house.