Euphemistic references to walking

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

From “Call the Midwife” ( mildest of spoilers)

Chummy, unable to ride a bike, declares that she will get about on Shank’s Pony. The other girls remark that their territory is 8 square miles, and “Shank’s Pony” isn’t going to cut it, and she is going to have to learn to ride a bicycle.

Shank’s Pony clearly is a euphemistic way of saying “I’ll walk” I guess referring to the shanks in one’s shoes.

There was a jazz song, I think, that mentioned “Driving my shoes” in a similar way…making it obvious that you had to walk, but jokingly dressing it up as a preferred way to get about.

I’m wondering about other such colorful ways of describing walking that are in actual use. Not just slang like “hoofing it” but with the added bit of dressing it up…“Taking the Adidas limited” would be the sort of thing, if I hadn’t just made that up.

2

The ankle express.

3

I found the jazz song I was thinking of: Tom Scott “Got to get out of New York” After the 1:30 intro, the lyrics start out “I was playin’ the blues and drivin’ my shoes when I moved to New York…”

4

Similar idea - the ultimate in physical data/information transfer, delivery via “sneaker-net.”

5

I’ve mostly heard this one as “shank’s mare”. This article indicates that it’s derived from a Scottish expression “shank it”, which is in turn a reference to shanks as leg bones. An earlier variant was apparently “shank’s nag” (or some creative spelling thereof).

6

Shoe-leather Express

7

Taking the “Sears Cadillac”, of course.

Jimi Hendrix, “Highway Chile”

8

When I first moved to Colorado, I got around by Zapatomobile. (Zapato being Spanish for shoe.)

9

In Swedish, you’ve got the wonderfully odd “the horses of the apostles”, or “the apostles’ horses”, meaning your feet (when used for transportation).

So, for example, you can say, “eh, I’m just gonna head on over to that hill on ‘the horses of the apostles’”, meaning you’re just going to walk there.

10

“I called/used Feet Bros cab company.”

11

The Dutch use the term “benenwagen”, which would be translated as ‘the leg cart’.

12

While not directly on point, the expression “sneakernet” (a method of transferring files by carrying a floppy from one computer to another) is related.

13

I had a pothead friend in high school who called it “foot rotations,” so I sometimes say “make with the foot rotations.”

14

What shanks in your shoes? Yes shanks mean legs, see for instance Edward Longshanks.

I would hear “shanks mare” from my mother when young.

When I was late-teens and 20s we called walking “cagging” I have no idea why. “let’s go cag the mall”

Hell, first time I have ever written it - for all I know it could be kagging.

15

Zero euphemismsin this thread so far - and there won’t be any either. In order for a euphemism to exist for any X, that X has to be somehow socially unacceptable or painful. Walking does not meet those criteria. A euphemism is a let’s say ‘family-friendly’ term: ‘To pass away’ is euphemism for ‘to die’, and ‘last year’s unpleasantness’ can be a euphemism for the time when you got drunk and danced on the table naked in front of your inlaws until you passed out in your own bodily fluids (which in turn is a euphemism for piss, barf, and shit).

16

Well, it’s a figure of speech, at any rate. It’s probably somewhere in the category of metaphor, but I can’t find anything with the very specific “used to humorously refer to a neutral topic” connotation.

17

While not directly on point, Luka Bloom has a song called The Acoustic Motorbike (e.g., a bicycle.)

18

Actually, to the point that there is some embarrassment involved in not having the money to pay for other means of transport, these can be considered euphemisms.