I got stopped for speeding once, just after having dropped off the last of the sloppy-drunk friends who’d been packed in my car (I was Designated Driver). It was wintertime, so they’d all been talking and singing and breathing and snoring and so forth with the car windows up.
Well. When the cop approached my car, and I rolled the driver window down, I can only imagine what foul and heavy liquor-esque stench flew out to melt off his eyelashes! :eek:
He immediately yanked me out of the car for the whole “walk the line, touch the nose” routine, and then gave me a breathalyzer.
He made me take the breathalyzer again.
He called for backup, and used THAT cop’s breathalyzer machine on me.
At the time I was all nervous and shit (even though I knew I hadn’t been drinking… people in passing cars were staring and all), so I wasn’t thinking to explain to him that I’d just dropped off a carload of heavy-breathing Jack Daniels in Skin Sacks. It didn’t even occur to me WHY he didn’t believe the results of the breathalyzer test(s) until I was back at home. (He couldn’t do anything but give me my speeding ticket and send me on my way, because I wasn’t showing up drunk… but he ordered me to go straight home. I should have said, “I will, officer… right after I make that stop for Dollar Drink night at the Hootin’ Horsie.”)