Ever get tired of Microsoft creating a standard process nd then not using it themselves?

The BBQ Pit
1

I just had the ill fate to have to reload IE8 and got the full range of what I’m talking about.

They had a standard Progress Bar, but instead of it going left to right once, stopping at the end, it goes left to right dozens of times, so you have no clue how far along it is or even whether it’s hung.

On the Windows Update page they know that you care about how long the download will take. The thing says that at my connection speed the download will take one minute. Fine, please run the latest batch. But wait, that was not for the full download, just the starter file, which sucks in more and more really long files, with not even a file count given in advance, and a half hour later my computer is still tied up.

It demands to know various versions of software I have, but does not tell me the complete version number of what I’m downloading, so I get some stuff that I already had last time.

Throughout the whole process the hourglass is not started until at least a minute into the process, so I’m not sure if I started it off or not.

At the end, after a couple of forced reboots, it has deleted my settings for home page, search engine, what files I want/don’t want on my Links bar.

Then it offers to remove some of the many extra buttons it’s added, but won’t let me remove the most annoying- an unnecessary separate Search window and an unnecessary Favorites tab. I only use these with hotkeys, so the new buttons are a waste of space, and I can’t even move them out of the way, they are stuck in top and leftmost positions.

Then I wanted to use their forum to ask about one problem. They insisted (insisted!) that I call their support phone line because it was free until December for IE8. Well, there was a endless phone tree, but none of the responses fit my question, I kept returning to the top. Another failure to follow their own format. So I pressed 0 and got a person, who grilled me about my name and city and home phone number and then disconnected me. Ach!

This of course is why I usually use Firefox.

If they simply followed the patterns they themselves laid out for others, I might resent their market dominance less. Somebody should tell them that. But their own email address is a well kept secret.

2

“We are Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.”

3

Lower your shields and surrender your ships. We will add your biological and technological distinctiveness to our own. Your culture will adapt to service us. Resistance is futile.

4

Changing a documented process and not replacing it is another rage maker.

An app I loved in XP was Folder Size. Basically it have you a column in folder explorer that showed folder sizes in addition to file sizes. It worked flawlessly and transparently in the background.

http://social.msdn.microsoft.com/forums/en-US/windowsgeneraldevelopmentissues/thread/2056b237-574d-483c-8ecd-f2842dd70081/

Basically they removed the API it needs, and the maliciously incompetent, goat fucking, subhuman trash, that whores it’s soulless body out for an M$ paycheck was too stupid to replace it with an API that provides equivalent functionality.

Yes I’m slightly bitter.

5

A personal favorite of mine is Microsoft’s preference for using its own buzzword to replace an industry-standard term. I don’t know if they do this so that they can trademark their new custom buzzword, or if they’re just malicious.

Their help index will ONLY find their custom buzzword – so if you don’t remember that, for example, “bookmarks” is called “favorites” in MS products, you can’t even look it up in the help function.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been reduced to idly wandering through the help index trying to look for a hint as to whether what I am lookng for is named “field,” “variable,” “code,” “function,” “subroutine,” or whatever.

6

I’m glad MS didn’t revamp/reorganize the entire menu system of Office 2007. ***PISSFUCK ***I’m glad they didn’t do that and offer no built-in option to have the classic menu functionality. ***GOATRAPER! ***I’m glad it doesn’t have arbitrarily limited customizability. SHITMONKEY GOBBLEFART NOODLE CASSEROLE! I’m awfully glad they didn’t reorganize a lot of the features to put them in different places than their previous menus or from 99 percent of other software. ***COCKSMASH SOCKPUPPET-SPOOGE UNFAIR PARKING TICKET VOMITMEAT!!! ***I’m just so glad they didn’t just add features and functionality, but that they left things that worked alone. ***BOOGERLUNCH MANGLED FINGER ANALPIMPLE FUCKROAST CANCELED ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT MOULDY DOUCHE GILBERT GODFRIED/ROSANNE PORN FUCKNUGGETS [SIZE=7]OVERUSE OF COMIC SANS [/SIZE]TITWHIPS !!!

7

Have you seen this hilarious e-mail from Bill Gates a few years ago?

8

Fact:
A million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will produce Microsoft standards compliant app releases on an average of once every 3 business days.

9

Did you see the part where he says he sends e-mails like that every day? :smiley: