I WAS COMBING MY HAIR!!!
Out of your room? I thought you wanted PRIVACY…oh.
Dad walks in on his son yanking the chain of love:
Dad: Stop that son, you’ll go blind if you do that.
Son: Dad? Dad? I’m over here! Behind you!
Oh yes they do! And it’s pretty fun to watch.
Anyway, I haven’t been caught, but me and some friends of mine caught another buddy in the dorm. We were going out drinking, and left this guy in his room. Now before we left, we’d noticed that one of the porno tapes that circulated in the dorm was sitting on the coffee table. We came back about 10 minutes later to get someone’s forgotten wallet, and we came in to find this guy half under a blanket, beet red, no porno tape visible and VCR on. We just got the wallet, left, and completely lost it when we got to the stairwell, and couldn’t stop laughing until we got to the bar.
What is this masturbating of which you speak?
Nope, some close calls though.
Semi-related funny stories:
Two friends of mine had a sleep-over (when they were maybe 14-15) over at which they watched a porno. Afterwards, the friend of mine who was the guest jerked off in a sock (by himself.) Then, he put the sock back on the next morning.
The other friend (the one whose house it was in the other story) came over my house once, and decided to pleasure himself in my bathroom. As he was cumming, he grabbed my shower curtain (he was doing it into the toilet) for support, and accidentally pulled the rod down, causing his jizz to spray everywhere.
(Bolding mine) This guy came over your house? What is he, the Jolly Green Giant? Regarding the toilet incident, which rod was being pulled?
No, no. I was refering to candlelight also. Soft candle there. Ick, melty.
Wine, robes, candles. Damn. I hope your SO treats you as well, if not better.
I was caught by my freshman year roommate. Turned out I was getting caught repeatedly - I thought he was asleep, and he heard me. We both laughed about it - I give him mad props for that, because it was 1986, he was straight, and I wasn’t. Could’ve been so much worse.
My mother walked into my bedroom at an inopportune moment. Her precise comment was: “Eeek!”
She rounded up my father and directed him to sit down with me and instruct me in the Facts of Life.
He began to explain things to me, but apparently not to the satisfaction of my mother, who was listening in from around a corner, and who then marched in and told my father that he had it all wrong.
While my parents vociferously comment upon each other’s subject knowedge, or lack thereof, I quietly snuck away, visited a hardware store, and installed a lock on my bedroom door.
Having a lock on your door is almost as bad as being caught. You are saying “I do things in here that I don’t want people to catch me doing”
…if you get my drift…
Never been caught.
My door is locked any and all times I am in my room. To me it says “GO AWAY!”
Lobsang, the issue is not being caught, the issue is not being disturbed.
Well, you could always tell them you have a crystal meth lab in your closet.
There was a rumor going around my high school that my best friend’s crush was caught jerking off in the bathroom at the dentist’s office. Knowing the guy, I could believe it.
A long time ago, one guy gave me a large box of his Hustler magazines (No, the pages weren’t all stuck together.) Anyway, I shared an apartment with another guy. He was the maintenance guy at the apartment, and he has asked a friend to come over and help him paint some apartments. I got off from school early that day, walked into my supposedly empty apartment, opened my bedroom door…
and found my roommate’s assistant, wankin’ away on my bed surrounded by a bunch of Hustlers open to the fold-outs.
Stunned, I just backed out and closed the door. I went down by the pool for a while. When I went back, he was gone—and I did the laundry.
" No… I’m always careful. There have been some very close calls though "
me too 
like parents are coming home too early, and i hear their footsteps and keys ringin in the doorlock FUCK ! i have to close like a few windows with kazaa porn, and escape the room all in about 2 seconds
This coming from a guy named Jpeg Jones? :dubious:
I’ve been horribly close to getting caught, to the point of getting off the bed, walking two awfully-hunched-over steps, taking something from my dad (shut up) and returning, all with oants fully undone.
Hi I’m Troy McClure! You may have seen me in some ambarrasing situations such as…