…and produced by Pixar.
20 posts- let’s sum up what we have so far:
This will be a documentary about the life and death of Jesus Christ, based on the bestselling novel by Raymond Feist (yet to be written?). It is also a platform for Michael Moore and Paul Verhooven to attack each other’s politics. Screenplay by Joss Whedon, directed by Steven Spielberg, J.M.S. and Joss Whedon, and shot in the film noir style.
It will feature Samuel L. Jackson (holding a sword), Ewan McGregor, Angelina Jolie, Geena Davis, Laura Linney, Jennifer O’Dell, Geena Davis and Bruce Campbell, all getting naked and having a variety of unusual sex scenes (including a controversial full-frontal bondage piece from Ewan McGregor) to a soundtrack by Nick Cave. Explosions by WETA.
Dude, I would so see this movie. 
That’s the idea, NailBunny! I’m gonna be rich!
You had me at “Ewan MacGregor”. Throw in a bondage scene? I’m so there. I don’t think I need anything else. Except perhaps corsets. But not on Ewan. On the women.
How about some exploding swords?
Oh, with me NOIR isn’t so much about the shadows and light in the cinematography so much as a twisting, turning dark storyline about corruption and betrayal and danger, where a happy ending isn’t guaranteed or expected. But yeah, add all of your components and a plot that includes elements of the above, and you’ve got a real winner on your hands.
A documentary about Jesus told from two conflicting radical political viewpoints? I think we can guarentee those factors.
I think we’re going to need some major disasters, too…hurricanes, earthquakes, floods, meteors, etc.
Look I’m sorry I’m just not getting this could you give me the logline?
Say:
An obsessive-compulsive messiah, a quirky swordsman, and a talented team of cheerleaders join together for a heist in a Broadway theatre during an earthquake.
So this is how test-marketing is done for movies. Actually, it explains a lot!
But one of them will eventually turn on all the others!
Well, I’m going to demand corsets, but they have to be covered in beautiful dresses from some time period prior to the 1940s. I don’t care if it’s Ewan McGregor in drag, so long as the clothes come off at some point. And he has to have the surprised-with-quirky-smile look, not necessarily while naked.
I think this movie could be made and, with my criteria, aired on Masterpiece Theatre if produced by a British company.
You forgot JThunder’s Pixar requirement. I second that, especially because so far I’m very much not interested in this film. But if Pixar is involved, I’d have to see it.
Judas Iscariot doesn’t hang himself.
He has a crisis of conscience, of course (which is written by Kevin Smith), and, when he realizes his sinfulness…
(wait for it)
(wait for it)
he gets superkicked by the archangel Michael…
played by Shawn Michaels.
And of course, Michael Keaton as Batman. If he’s prepared.
How about a space battle? There just aren’t enough space battles these days.
But the space battle must have NO sound. And no banking.
I know I already requested Bruce Campbell, but is it too late to throw Dakota Fanning into the mix? And maybe a cute little Jack Russell terrier like the one on “Frasier”? Oh, and both Dakota and the doggie are playing angels?
At some point, we must have James Earl Jones and Alan Rickman. With plenty of dialogue for each.