No! :eek:
Official Jewish Internal Memo
For Authorized Recipients Only
Please submit foreskin DNA and chicken soup recipie for verification…
To: All Fellow Jewish Evolutionary Consipirators
From: Zev Steinhardt, Semi-official Jewish lookout on the Straight Dope Message Board
Subject: Possible Leak, Investigation Needed
To Whom It May Concern:
It has come to my attention that our manipulation of the eveloutionary process has been discovered by someone in the company of kung fu lola. Needless to say, gentlemen, this is bad. This matter was to have the highest classification of secrecy and someone involved has leaked the matter. I recommend a top level investigatory commission to look into the matter. While they are at it, they can also look into who sent my grandmother’s Top Secret chicken soup recipie to Laidies Home Journal, as they printed it on page 57 of the August 2004 issue.
In the meantime, since this method of world domination has been compromised, I suggest that we abandon it at once. We must immediately stop controlling evolution and allow all the other races of the world to devolve back into apes. Remember to stick to the “official story” of Adam being the progenitor of all mankind and being created by a Creator.
Furthermore, it is recommended that we move on to Plan Gamma-Theta-Sigma - the plan to dominate the world by cornering the chicken soup market.
Yours truly,
Agent Zeta-Eplison-Vu
Zev Steinhardt
Shouldn’t that be Agent Zayin Tseire Vav? 
If you stop being gay, why would you enjoy fucking men?
Considering that the World Jewish Population is around, what a couple million? And the World Arab Popular is a whole bunch more than that…and how many “Jews are in Control Of Whatever” theories out there, I am beginning to think that the Arab/Muslim population is a wee bit paranoid.
Not that there is anything wrong with a nice bit of paranoia now and then.
PSSSSST… kfl is one of them les-bi-ans.
Eh. Go back 40 or 50 years and compare the World Jewish population to the World European-descended population. And realize that the “Jews are in Control of Whatever” conspiracies have been around a lot longer than the Arab/Israeli conflict, and that paranoia about the Jews has been pretty much a given for 2000 years or so.
When confronted by ignorance that vast just smile and walk away. It would take you twenty years, the staff of a large university, and a cattle prod to break down a pile of stupidity that big. You’d be spending your time more profitably trying to discuss Descartes with your dog; he’d wouldn’t get it either but he’d at least enjoy the attention.
I got confused because I don’t really ever hear lesbians being referred to as gay.
Huh?
I’m gay and I enjoy fucking men!
:eek: :eek:
Next time, beat him in the head while screaming, “Straight Dope Dot Com, motherfucker!”
Fuck that, we don’t need him. Send him somewhere like the Free Republic or Stormfront, they have it coming.
So, I’m curious. When was the first anti-Jewish conspiracy theory cooked up? Does the whole “Jews control the world” line of bullshit really go back 2,000 years?
Oh, and since this is the pit, fuck that stupid little pipsqueek fucker.
Maybe they ran out of ink? Of all the miracles all of the prophets have performed across history, how many of them turned water into ink?
Ahhh…
-Joe, kind of agrees on Dark Age ][ hitting us soon…
Do you think there might have been a self-interested agenda behind that statement? 
That would just be throwing Bre’r Rabbit in the briar patch.
If the Jews want everyone to believe in evolution, why did the author of Genesis (who was undoubtedly Jewish) write that God created everything in 6 days?
Between the bagel and the the theory of evolution, you guys have pretty much invented everything worthwhile.
I’m pretty sure a goy invented the beer hat, though.
Interestingly, according to… something Engineers, by L. Sprague DeCamp, a jewish woman invented distilled spirits, IIRC.
I think that’s exactly what he wants.