“I’m so afraid you’ll work in an office, have children, celebrate wedding anniversaries … The world of heterosexuals is a sick and boring life.” —Edie Massey, Female Trouble
I for one welcome our new Jewish overlords and their delicious Matzo ball soup and Mogen David Wine!
Why oh why are there no “Evolution tracts” that we can give to fundamentalists?
The recipe for Cock-a-Doodle-Noodle Soup (sorry, it was named by a very young child), unfortunately, is not only not Jewish, but only with severe modification can it even be made kosher. Oddly enough, however, it has also demonstrated intriguing reactions when scientists have mixed it with dirt.
So, does that mean Smeagol is one of the Uruk Hai?
This sounds like it might be an unholy corruption of the research on RNA formation from nucleotides in the presence of montmorillionite clay. It’s interesting stuff because it moves the hypothetical origin of life away from the Primordial Soup and onto land, but it’s a far, far cry from “mixing human DNA with dirt” and watching it “react.” (“AAAAGH! Get it off me!!”)
It’s the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup theory of biogenesis:
Scientist #1: “Hey – you got your DNA in my dirt!”
Scientist #2: “Hey – you got your dirt in my DNA!”
Together: “Wait a minute…look!” (Big smiles)
Announcer: DNA and dirt is a winning combination. Try it at your next party. See what kind of reaction you get."
Actually, the Jewish God is strongly against mixing DNA with dirt.
My mother when she used to work as a waitress would often serve “Chicken-Neck-and-Noodle Soup.” One days she slipped and referred to it that way as she served the local Catholic priest his bowl of soup. He was apparantly more amused than not.
That kid’s been talking to Mel Gibson’s father, hasn’t he?