Ewwww. Thank Gawd for nose hairs.

So an old high school friend of mine took me to my first Rennaissance Faire. Interesting experience, but this thread is not about that.

The venue was kind of dusty; there were large patches of bare ground, and the wind would occasionally kick up large clouds of dirt. I was breathing fine, so I didn’t think anything of it, except for a bit of cogitation when I had to wipe a layer of dirt off my glasses, and it actually stained my shirt.

But then I got home and showered. I blew my nose… and my snot was BLACK. If not black, it was definitely a very DARK hue. I thoroughly cleaned out my nostrils, and MORE black snot and goo came out.

My Lord, it reminded me of those Oreck air filter commercials. Was I really gonna breathe in all THAT before my body’s natural defenses stopped it? I usually think of nose hairs as necessary annoyances, because they tend to peek out of my nostrils and make me trim them, and go to the bother of clearing out the little bits afterwards. But now I’m utterly grateful!

I mean, ewww.

When I was travelling by London Underground on a regular basis, I forgot that snot came in any colours other than black.

Welcome to the wonderful world of Faire boogers. Just wait until you have a crusty, and try to flick it off your nose, and it won’t budge, so you gently and discreetly hook it with a fingernail, and instead of coming loose it pulls with it a grape-sized blob of mucus from your sinuses!

Not like this has ever happened to me, of course. It happened to…a friend.

Yeah, try living in India. My snot was black every day from the pollution and dust.

If you didn’t have nose hair, then wouldn’t your nostrils start sticking together all the time? Ewww…

Whenever I work in dusty locations (usually doing electrical work in a dusty insulation filled sub attic at work) I have black snot for at least two days.

My brother-in-law just poured us a new concrete (colored/stamped) patio. My snot was the same color as the powder coloring agent he used.
It’s less surprising when you learn to expect it.

If it’s green, that means your brain is moldy.

I used to work at a place that did energetic material testing. One test we did was to determine the characteristics of a new type of rocket fuel. After the test was over, I had to go into a structure that looked surprisingly similar to a restaurant “South of the Border”, and clean it up to get ready for the next text. You guys think dirt and grout coming out of your nose for a couple days is bad, try spent rocket fuel. And I even wore a SARS mask!

Funny, I remember someone once commenting to me about black boogers. We were on our way out of a Ren Faire.

Trying working in a haymow for an afternoon. Your snot comes out this hideous black-green/forest green color, which is also the color of the sweat-mud under your bra, in your gloves, and in between your toes. If you’re mowing straw, it comes out in this burnt sienna color. Unloading the wagon produces snot with flakes of hay in it and a grass green color.

It’s a Crayola box of snot-venture.

I was going to mention this as well, but my experience was just a day sight seeing in London. This was 20 years ago, been back more recently and I didn’t find it as bad.

Go riding an ATV on a dry dusty trail. You’ll have dirt coming out of your nose for a week. You need to use nose nasal wash to get rid of the concreted nose. Every bit of clothing is 80% dust by mass.