No; I am a God: “Let the be LIGHT!”
Trying to find a thermostat for a 1970 Corvair is no different from seeking one for a 1963 Mustang. Try telling the new guys to look up 1965 Corvair radiator caps or antifreeze recommendations.
Corvairs had thermostats, but you’ll probably have to go here Clark's Corvair Parts - Clark's Corvair - Clarks Corvair Parts for them.
That being said, we used to send kids all over the school seeking left-handed post hole diggers, metric adjustable wrenches, board stretchers, and the like.
Working as a scuba instructor we had a couple terms for particularly bad certified divers… Bicycle was for those who had bad form and kicked the reef, kicked their dive guide, kicked their buddy, and/or pretty much kept their legs moving constantly in an ineffective manner.
Muppets. Just like Kermit and Ms Piggy, diver Muppets can’t do anything on their own. They need someone to pull their proverbial strings for them and its all they can do to breath for themselves. And yet they choose to engaged in an activity that requires a form of life support equipment!? :smack:
Either term could be referred to just by whistling a few bars of the appropriate song.
PEBCAK: Problem Exists Between Chair And Keyboard.
The first item, of course, I call “IDAT.”
We joke about “I-TEN-T-D” errors because our desktop support guy is dyslexic.
Electrical and electronic things that have failed are said to have had “all the smoke leak out”.
Variable names like “I1|l” or “O00O0O00OO” are always fun, especially in groups.
Auto parts: Weber carburetors are known by their bore size(s) and a several letters model name such as 45 DCOE, or a 32/36 DGV. We would tell customers that Weber had moved production to the mid-east and had a new model coming out the 32/36 PLO. Or if we had a dense customer we might describe him as needing a 45 ID-IOT.
Training: a golden retriever (or cocker spaniel). When you are teaching a subject you look out and see one or more students have that same intelligent look on their face as a golden retriever puppy. You have LOST them.
One instructor told this story at an instructor conference. Instructor is from Texas with the accent to go with. He is teaching in Orlando to a class of Hispanics (mostly Cuban) students. Class is on electrical fault tracing and he is describing how a wiper switch works. He notices he has a room full of cocker spaniel puppies and asks one student where they got lost. The answer was (with a heavy accent) “What is this whopper switch you are talking about?”
We all laughed but at lunch we went to Burger King got a Whopper box and stopped by the auto parts store for a toggle switch. We installed the switch in the lid and that afternoon gave him a whopper switch.
Spark plugs for a 300D Mercedes. Got my boss on that one once.
What passes for humor at my job doesn’t amuse me at all: the boss and coworkers making fun of “stupid” customer requests and “incompetent” people in other departments.
No you cannot use all the power and balance your load Dammit! 
CAPT
I’m a balloonist (both hot air & helium). After a festival last weekend, was talking to my boss at irk about it. Now I realize that not everyone has been in one & may not know the finer points of flying but…
he was asking me about how we inflate, which is to cold air inflate it most of the way with a large fan & then hit the burners to heat it up & rotate it upright to the normal flying position. He then cut me off to say, “when you get up in the air, you rotate them 90º to control direction, right.”
Ahhh, no! The big flame it to heat the air in the balloon & make it hot (hence the name ‘hot air balloon’) allowing you to rise above the Earth where we proceed to travel with the wind; we do not have afterburners like a #@$^& military jet shooting flames in the opposite direction of travel! :smack:
One year at the annual safety seminar, we had a really great guy from the electric company. Instead of boring us with the voltage in specific lines, which we would never remember later & really didn’t need to know, he put it in very simple terms that I’ve never forgotten since. He said you can tell how much current is in the line by looking at the resistors; holding up a small one he said, " if you fly into a power line with this attaching it to the pole, you’ll get an open casket", holding up a medium sized one, he said, “closed casket”. He then put them down & picked up a large one in one hand, blew across the palm of his other hand & simply stated, “no casket”. Very simple & very effective!
A few weeks before I started where I work now, they hired a new Accounts Payable employee. We are a food processor, and we have a Food quality testing lab in the plant, which is next door to the main company office.
Our food quality lab has an attic where a lot of archived accounting documents and computer boxes are stored.
This new employee was asked by our controller to go look for some documents in the attic. So she went out to the lab, after being familiarized on the requirements for being in the plant (hairnet always and lab coat if you have any buttons on your shirt.)
Out in the lab, there is a shower system for emergency chemical burns or whatever, with a lever which activates it.
One the new employee got out there, the ladies in the lab showed her the lever and said it would release the attic ladder so she could go look for her documents.
So she walked over to the lever, pulled it, and got soaked.
Another joke is related to the hairnets and beard nets. Often when someone has been a little lax in shaving, one of our managers will insist that they need to use a beardnet.