#9) In long numbered lists, one number is invariably left out.
I never knew that about British swans, so are there roving gangs of arm-breaking swans over there or what?
Well… No. That’s the point of the joke. Little white lie mothers tell children to keep them from meddling with swans. (or maybe the mothers actually believe it themselves now)
I remember reading about how male ducks can break your arms. Or maybe it wasn’t reading, maybe it was a combination of watching “The Mighty Ducks” and something else. Possibly “The Trumpeter Swan.” I can’t say that anybody warned me about it though.
I’m pretty sure this list comes from Peter Kay.
I am a full grown (rather too full grown) adult man and I could take a swan. Bring the feathery bastards on!
Owl - who has (treasonously) eaten swan - it’s foul.
The attribution at the end of the list in the OP agrees with you.
And, oh, do I empathize with the list. I never knew why I luuurrve sharpening a pencil with a knife. But he’s right, it IS an inexplicably manly feeling.
Harumph! Damn lime-eaters should get some brass. Us 'murricans aren’t afraid of our waterfowl though that is mainly due to plentiful shotguns and we aren’t scared when stroking a horse. Still best to put a hay bale behind old Blue when you’re combing out his tail. We’re brave but not stupid.
…I assume that #15 was referring to coat grooming. I hope it was.
Can someone 'splain this to me, please?
See post #19
It’s already been explained. Enter it in a calculator and turn it upside down. Or just read Flander’s spoiler post.
:o
slinks away
Missing, Presumed Dead was the third discworld video game, I think.
I always thought swans had the potential for extreme violence, especially after a female swan killed Donna Karan’s daughter’s dog in Central Park when it got too close to her nest. My father grew up in Wales, and he remembers being terrified of the swans that lived in the pond in the village common.
This is fricking hilarious. And so true. I think it also applies to any bar near close.
Are you aware of just how painfully a swan can pinch you? It rips out chunks of meat and skin if it gets you at the right angle :eek: . I’ll put money on 10 swans over a full grown adult any day.
From growing up in the 70s when calculators became more common I remember a long “joke” involving oil and the middle east where you entered numbers adding, subtracting, multiplying and dividing (which was all calculators did back then) to spell out at the end 71077345. Does it ring a bell for anyone else?
That was the first thing I thought of when I saw the list. it actually took me a minute to figure out what it really was. 'Course, I grew up (somewhat) in the '70s.
We would always try to talk to each other with our calculators.
07734
14
5318008
We would also substitute the 8 for an A as well and end up with 3704558
Depends on the dog. I’d sure as hell respect a man carrying around a St. Bernard…
Reaper Man - when Death disappears, leaving Susan to pick up the pieces. He is described on the back cover as well, missing, presumed… er… Gone.
If it was with Susan, it wouldn’t have been Reaper Man, as that was the one where he got “fired”.
The one with Susan was Soul Music.
What’s the deal with never running out of salt? I’ve done it lots of times. Is there some sort of Monthly Government Salt Giveaway in the British Empire or something? Lots of Salt Hoarding going on?
Oh, and Eau de Wet Dog is as impossible to describe as Wet Cat. The closest anyone’s ever gotten that I know of is a pronouncement loosely spelled, “EAAAGUGHGGGGGHHHHHYUUUUUUUUUUGHGGGGGGGGHHHHH.”
It is, however, completely distinctive, and once you’ve smelled it once, you’ll never forget it.
I gotta confess, I’m rather puzzled by this whole list.
Uh… yeah… I’m forever getting them mixed up.
Oh yep, that’s right, people stop dying in Reaper Man, but in Soul Music Susan takes over (without knowing it at first) and people do die. (Note to non-Pratchett readers: This, believe it or not, is a good thing).
But I think the quote is from Reaper Man, not Soul Music. I think. Must go and check…