Fake Advice Column Letters (Another Cary Tennis Thread)

[Freudian_Slit]

I know we’ve had threads on him before. And I’m almost positive this letter about a man whose wife leaves him after he gets a little too excited at SeaWorld has got to be fake. But do you think Cary knows that?

My wife left me because the dolphins at Sea World gave me an erection

Anyway, we were all at Sea World and it was hotter than hell, so we decided to go to a show to cool off for a while. It was one of those shows where the dolphins jump up and do tricks and then the big killer whale splashes everybody with water. And at this show I started watching the dolphins jump around, and it just captivated me. I admired their soft slippery skin. It was just so exotic; I had never felt that way before. Looking at those soft underbellies and long slender fins was like seeing the face of God. I came out of my dolphin-induced trance and wiped the sweat from my brow. It was then that I realized that I had an aching erection. I became alarmed, but that only made it throb harder. For the entire rest of the show I tried my damnedest to keep my arousal in check, but every glance I took at the cetaceans in the pool below induced a surge of hormones from my perspiring testicles.

[Freudian_Slit]

OK, reading his response, I don’t think he believes it either. But still. Why print it at all?

[lavenderviolet]

I’m sure they get a lot of the same questions over and over so I’d guess they were amused by the novelty of that weird letter.
But, yeah, that letter is totally fake. The clincher for me was that I just can’t imagine the wife actually figured out he was turned on by the dolphins (instead of, say, the dolphin’s trainer). I don’t think most people would that easily make the leap to figuring out their spouse is attracted to non-humans.